A Matrimonial Accord
by skygirl55
Summary: A long lost relative, a curiously worded will, and an expansion of their partnership agreement lead Castle and Beckett down a path neither of them could have ever imagined. Caskett. Set mid-Season 3.
1. Chapter 1

**A Matrimonial Accord**

* * *

A long lost relative, a curiously worded will, and an expansion of their partnership agreement lead Castle and Beckett down a path neither of them could have ever imagined. Caskett. Set mid-Season 3.

20 Chapters + Epilogue

Thanks to Travis for the cover art!

* * *

**One**

Richard Castle stepped off the elevator on the homicide floor of the Twelfth Precinct with a spring in his step and a whistle on his lips. For some reason that morning he had awoken in a particularly positive mood. He had no concrete reason for feeling the way he did, but his gut told him that something good was about to happen—perhaps even something extraordinary.

As Castle rounded the corner of the wall partitioning the hall from the seating area he was able to spot his partner seated at her desk. Though her back was to him and thus he was unable to see her gorgeous eyes or knee-weakening smile, Castle immediately knew his day was about to get even better. It was all-but impossible for him to have a bad day around Beckett and seeing as his mood was already above-average, he didn't see that changing.

"Morning Beckett." He greeted her pleasantly when he was about a foot away from her desk. He didn't bother to wait for her to turn around and look at him; he simply slid into "his" seat beside her desk and folded his hands in his lap. "Sorry I wasn't here earlier, but Gina insisted that I…what's wrong?" Castle's story about his publisher's impromptu meeting that was, in his opinion, a waste of his time, died on his lips when he saw his partner looking far more befuddled than usual.

As though she hadn't even heard his inquiry, she gave him the smallest of smiles and said, "Hey Castle," before turning back to her computer screen.

Castle opened his mouth to respond, but perhaps atypically, took a moment to consider her before speaking. As they had been partners for nearly three full years, he believed himself to be well-versed in Beckett-ology. He knew her moods, her tones, and certainly her looks. The way she had said hello to him was pleasant, though distracted, almost as though she was deep in research for a case and wished not to have her train of thought interrupted. Yet, as the murder board beside them was pristinely white at that moment, he knew she was not preoccupied with a case, but something else. From the way he could tell her shoulders were a bit hunched and her left arm was resting on the desk yet also tight against her body, he knew something was going on and naturally his curiosity was piqued.

"Anything I can help you with?"

"Wha—I. No. No, I'm fine." She responded, only glancing at him for a brief moment.

He hummed and responded with, "Are you sure about that? You seem…stressed."

She huffed out a breath and turned to him. Her expression had softened slightly, though it was still clear she was not in a place to be one hundred percent truthful with him (though, to be fair, when was she?). "It's…I don't know." She dusted her fingers over her brow and then propped her elbow against the desk so she could cradle her chin with the heel of her hand. "It's a long story."

He grinned effortlessly and his heart jumped with anticipation. "Those are my favorite kind."

The corner of her lips curled briefly, and then she explained in a soft tone, "I got a really weird phone call from a lawyer yesterday and I'm trying to sort it out."

Immediately, Castle's brow wrinkled. His brain began to sift through all the possible scenarios that involved conversations with lawyers that could be both strange and slightly upsetting. Several dozen possibilities popped into his mind, and he took a few seconds to mentally scan through the most likely results, but almost all involved activities of a suspicious nature. Considering that upholding the law was literally her job, Castle very much doubted Beckett would have dabbled in any of those, which made her predicament all the more confusing—and worrisome. "Are you in trouble or something? Because my lawyer is great and he can-"

"No, no. It's nothing like that. Just forget I mentioned it."

"Well you know I can't do that," Castle responded pointedly. Honestly—how long had she known him? When had he ever let anything go (without the threat of force)? He crossed his right leg over his left and leaned his left elbow heavily against the desk while skimming his index finger over his top lip. "You know, I bet if I sat here long enough I could figure it out."

"Oh, please don't."

He grinned as he'd finally heard the hint of levity in her tone. "Where's the fun in that, Beckett? Now perhaps if you could just give me one clue—a place to start. Then I could start narrowing down the—oh." Castle cut off his own musings when an unfamiliar man approached Beckett's desk from the opposite side. The man, who appeared to be in his mid-sixties, was dressed in a long-sleeved polo shirt with khaki pants and a black jacket. Given these visual clues—and the fact that Kate did not have an active case—Castle guessed this man was not an employee of the NYPD, but a guest like himself. Perhaps he was just the clue Castle had been asking for.

The writer found the answer a moment later when Kate glanced up and gasped, "Dad!" She quickly pushed herself up from her desk and stammered out, "I—I thought I told you to call me when you got to the lobby!"

The elder Beckett gave a casual shoulder shrug. "They let me up. What's the matter Katie? Don't want me to meet your work-friends?"

Castle beamed as he watched their exchange. He pushed himself up out of his seat and smoothed down his blazer. So maybe this man would not help him discover Beckett's latest mystery, but the opportunity to meet Kate's father, a man whose story he also longed to know, would be a very worth consolation prize.

"No, obviously it's not that. Um, Dad." Kate paused to glance back to her partner, who was grinning like an over-excited child about to receive a present. Her lips curled softly in his reflection as she did the introductions. "This is Rick Castle; Castle, this is my father Jim Beckett."

Castle leaned in and extended his hand to shake the elder man's. "Pleasure to finally meet you, sir."

Jim smiled at him, pleasant with perhaps a hint of amusement. "You as well. I've heard so much about you from Katie."

"Good things, I hope."

"Some days," Kate interjected with a smirk in her partner's direction. Then, she quickly locked her computer and pulled the blazer off the back of her desk chair. "Anyway, my father and I are going to an early lunch so-"

"Why doesn't Rick come along?" Jim suggested.

"NO!" Kate barked practically before Jim had finished his question. Then she hastily looked at her partner and attempted to soften her answer. "I mean, I'm sure he has writing to do."

Castle fought to hold in his smirk. He would have _loved_ to go to lunch with Kate and her father but did not even have to see how Kate got whiplash at the suggestion to know it was something she would not agree too—especially not two seconds after their first meeting. He wasn't even offended by her reaction as much as he was thoroughly amused by it. He considered making a joke about his favorite hobby being procrastination just to see if he could ruffle her feathers even more, but considering she already seemed on the edge, he didn't want to push her over it. "No worries; I wouldn't want to intrude on a family lunch."

"I was just thinking he might have some insight into your dilemma."

"The legal dilemma?"

"No. Well, yes—but I'm not in any sort of trouble." Kate explained. She clearly struggled for a moment internally as she opened and closed her mouth several times, but no sound came out. Ultimately, she rounded her shoulders and dropped her chin, clearly giving in to sharing the story with her partner—much to his extreme delight.

"It's just, um, well the thing is… Evidently my mother had a very, very distant cousin who she didn't even know about or, at least, she never told either of us about. He lived in some far-off corner of France and he died a few weeks ago and…well, it's complicated."

"Complicated how?" Castle asked, not sure how that scenario related at all to her.

Kate spoke the next sentence as though it involved dental work without the use of any numbing medications. "He left his fortune to my mother or her, ah, heir…"

His brow raised quickly. "You?"

"Not exactly…"

"I don't understand," he said in response to her evasiveness. Thankfully, her father stepped in.

"The man's will stated that the heir needed to be married in order to receive the funds."

Castle opened his mouth, but immediately found himself at a loss for words with regards to such a strange circumstance. "That's…odd."

"Ridiculous," Kate snipped.

Castle took a half step back and considered. If he had been presented the scenario and asked how his partner would respond, he would have guessed "poorly" without second though. Considering that he would have described her at present as "conflicted" he believed he had not yet received the full story. "Not to overstep, but I'm guessing the value of the inheritance is rather significant."

While her father merely described it as, "Very," it was Kate who confessed, "About twenty million dollars."

"WHAT!?" Castle yelped so loudly that half the homicide floor looked in his direction. He hastily apologized in a lowered tone, but Kate appeared too overwhelmed to really react. Instead she said, "Now you see the issue."

"Hang on a second," Castle began as the information processed inside his mind. "You…you're not disappointed you can't get the inheritance—you're confused. So…so, does that mean you could still get married and accept the money? Or does the will not allow that? And what happens to the money if you don't marry?"

She nodded tersely. "We're currently trying to answer those questions. Dad's got a buddy of his looking into it."

"But you know, Katie, it's interesting that Rick mentioned that, because—"

"Well," Kate began loudly, clearly cutting off whatever her father was about to say, "we're going to be late for lunch. I'll text you later if there's a new case, okay Castle?"

She didn't even wait for his response before practically shooing her father towards the elevator. Castle watched them as they walked away, curious as to how the bizarre inheritance situation would play out. One thing was for certain: his gut had been right; that day had led to something extraordinary, he just wasn't yet sure how extraordinary it would be.

* * *

As the elevator doors closed in front of her, Kate Beckett shut her eyes and brought the fingers of her left hand up to pinch the bridge of her nose. God, hadn't the last twenty hours been stressful enough? She didn't even know what her feelings were for this whole situation, and now she had to deal with Castle's input, which, given the subject matter, would undoubtedly be exhausting and over the top. She knew she wasn't ready to deal with that yet, but now she didn't have a choice.

Still annoyed, she opened her eyes and turned to her father, snipping. "Thank you for that."

The elder man looked momentarily taken aback. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I hadn't planned on telling him, and now you did, so he's going to be all…Castle-y about it."

Jim arched a skeptical eyebrow. "You weren't sure if you were going to tell him about this? Really? Have I…misinterpreted your relationship all these years? I thought he was one of your closest friends."

Kate grumbled, unable to argue with that technically true statement. Still, this scenario came with many complications. "Okay, fine—I was going to tell him…maybe. I mean, if we find out that since I'm not currently married I cannot get the money, what's the point in telling anyone? It just becomes a sad story. If I can still get the money, I would tell him. I mean, he's the richest person I know—he'd give me a place to start with the financial aspect of things. But now…there are too many unknowns."

Jim bobbed his head. "True, very true, but I notice that there is one scenario that you didn't mention."

The elevator car doors opened on the ground floor of the precinct. Kate and her father stepped out and made their way towards the street through the crowded entryway. Once they were out on the sidewalk heading towards the subway, Kate asked, "Okay—what's the scenario that I didn't mention?"

Her father gazed at her a bit incredulously. "The one that you're most afraid of; the one where you can still accept the inheritance if you get married in the next ten days."

Kate felt her heart clutch with anxiety inside her chest. Her father was dead-on in saying it was the scariest possible scenario. The one she had thought about obsessively as she paced her apartment between one and two o'clock that morning. In ninety-nine-point-nine percent of situations, getting married for the sake of inheriting money or winning a contest (or whatever the insane scenario) would never have been something she considered. But twenty million dollars? That was a sum worth considering.

"Dad, how long have you known me?"

He smiled at her. "Over thirty years."

"Right. So given that knowledge, what do you think the odds are of me getting married in the next ten days if the situation you just proposed is correct?"

"Were you required to marry a stranger or someone chosen by the will or executor, I would say the odds were zero; however, assuming you could marry anyone—including a long time male friend or acquaintance—I'd say they were worth considering." Without missing a beat her father continued with, "Rick Castle is unmarried, isn't he?"

Again, Kate's heart clutched in her chest. She felt perspiration form along her hairline as she insisted, "I'm not marrying Rick Castle."

"It wouldn't be forever," her father gently reminded, "Just until-"

"Dad c'mon!" Kate huffed and swiped her Metro card so aggressively that it did not register, and she had to swipe it another time. Once her father was also through the turnstile, she continued. "Whether it be for a day, a year, or five years I'm not marrying Castle just to get some inheritance."

"Twenty million dollars is more than just 'some inheritance'. Think of all you could do!"

"I don't need money," she pointed out. Would she turn away a windfall of several thousand dollars to cushion her retirement account? Of course not—assuming there were no other strings attached—but she did not need millions and millions of dollars to live her life. She didn't need designer clothing or vacation homes or even extravagant vacations. She was perfectly fine with how things were.

"I'm not saying that you should buy a penthouse or a yacht. What about charities? Cancer research? Homeless people—homeless animals?"

Kate pressed her lips together slightly as she considered his statement. Her brain had been so busy panicking that the word "married" was even remotely connected to the inheritance that she had failed to think much beyond the fact that she did not need or want twenty million dollars. As her father was implying, she could give every penny of it away if she so chose and that certainly put a different spin on her consideration. With that amount of money, she could do a great deal of good—so much good that she did not want to completely shut down and make a selfish choice, even if the sacrifice could be a significant one.

Shaking her head, Kate pushed those notions from her mind and said, "Let's just see what the lawyers come back with, okay? Once I actually know what my options are, I can make an informed decision."

Jim nodded, reached out and gave his daughter's hand a little squeeze. "You would have made an excellent lawyer, you know."

A soft smile crossed her face and she said, "I know."

"I'm always so proud of you, Katie. And I'm not just saying that to get money from you, either."

Kate laughed, and led the way towards the arriving subway car. "Good to know, Dad; good to know."

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**A/N** Hello and welcome to my CastleFicathon2019 entry. I am VERY excited about this one. I really think you guys will love it.

As per usual, bi-weekly updates. 20 Chapters + Epilogue

Thank you for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

**TWO**

On Thursday, Castle stepped off the elevator on the homicide floor with cautious excitement. Since he watched her leave with her father two days earlier Castle had heard nothing from his partner and, in a rare moment of self-restraint, he had not reached out to her, though she had been on his mind almost continually during that time. Her predicament certainly was a far more interesting story than even he could concoct—at least, for the moment.

The afternoon after he learned about Kate's possible inheritance, Castle found himself thinking about what she would do with such a windfall. He knew his partner was not a frivolous or materialistic person, so he did not believe she would use the money to buy a designer wardrobe, an expensive car, or a penthouse apartment. He could see her possibly taking a nice vacation—or treating her father to one—but nothing too extravagant. With that volume of money, though, the possibilities seemed endless. He was sure she'd save some for retirement—she was practical that way—and he decided she would probably make substantial charitable donations. Donations to charities her mother favored, he hazarded to guess.

The fact of the matter was: it was just so much money! When he had received his first check from Black Pawn, he had promised himself he was going to spend it reasonably, so naturally all of it was gone inside of a year, which in hindsight was not all that surprising. Though it had seemed an extreme amount to him, a college student in his early twenties, it really was not all that much. He was young, and a bit too irresponsible and overzealous. Had his twenty-three-year-old self been given the twenty million Kate was set to inherit, he doubted he would have gone through it that quickly—assuming he had at least tried to be reasonable about it. Of course, there was no concern for Beckett blowing through all her cash, but even if she wanted to donate the bulk of it, it would practically be a part-time job to do it the way he imagined she'd want to.

As he spent several hours thinking about the many possibilities, Castle could not help himself but to bring up the subject at the dinner table that evening. He told his mother and daughter all he knew about his partner's potential inheritance and a rather interesting discussion commenced. His mother insisted that she did not think Kate would take the money if she was required to marry in order to accept. His mother said that while she did not know Kate very well, what she did know told her that she would not compromise her morals or personal standings for any amount of money. Alexis, on the other hand, said she would absolutely accept the money were she in Beckett's shoes because with that amount could change many lives in the right hands. Castle did not feel overly surprised by her answer, particularly given her age, but he was a bit caught off-guard when she turned the question on him and asked what he would do if he was in his partner's place.

To that point in the day, he had not actually asked himself that question, which surprised him. He had been so preoccupied with what Kate might do (and, okay, a little preoccupied with what Nikki Heat might do, were he to incorporate such a storyline…which of course he would not, because that was far too meta) he never really put himself in her shoes.

After thinking for a few moments, Castle decided that if he was in Kate's place, he would take the money, because of all the good that could be done with it, as his daughter had mentioned. When their discussion furthered into a "what if this happens to me" scenario, Castle decided that, oppositely, if he was put in Kate's position, he would most likely not take the money. For starters, he did not need twenty million more dollars; he had more than enough to live the kind of life he wanted and there was no need to be glutinous about it. Furthermore, as he had experienced not one but two unpleasant marriages, he would certainly not take the inheritance if he had to go through with the marriage clause. True, having a business-arrangement-like marriage from the start would be different and certainly less heartbreaking than his previous experiences, but as he had no real desire for the money, he had no real desire to tolerate whatever marital arrangement would be required in order to accept it.

As the evening wore on, Castle began to second guess his "what if" scenario assessment, particularly after checking his email. Almost as if the universe had seen him hop up onto the fence of indecisiveness, one of the top emails in his inbox was one from a Manhattan animal shelter he had supported in the past at Alexis's request. The email contained several photos of sad, lonely cats and dogs alone in cages and Castle felt tugs at his heartstrings. Maybe getting married to get the money and giving it to those less fortunate would be a worthwhile exchange—assuming the person he would be marrying was someone he actually knew and liked.

By the time he crawled into bed, Castle genuinely wasn't sure what he would decide were he in Kate's situation, and he certainly did not envy the decision she had to make. That was the main reason he decided to leave her be, as much as it pained him. Now, though, he was more than ready for an update, and strongly resisted the urge to actually sprint to "his chair" beside her desk. Instead, he strolled as casually as he could and slipped into the seat with a nonchalant, "Good morning, detective."

"Castle," she said in acknowledgment, her eyes not leaving her computer screen. She finished typing the email she was in the middle of, clicked the send button, and then turned to face him. "How are you?"

"Good; I'm good. And you?"

"I'm doing just fine. We don't have an open case right now."

He plastered on one of his classic, charming smiles and said, "That's okay Detective; I just came to hang out."

She arched a skeptical eyebrow at him. "Hang out?"

"Of course." He casually folded his fingers together and rested them against the edge of her desk. "You know how I like to get away from my office to find inspiration."

She chewed on her bottom lip in that way that drove him crazy for a moment before letting out a huff of breath and shrugging her shoulders. "Okay, go ahead."

He tilted his head, curious. "'Go ahead' what?"

"You know what."

"I do not."

"Castle!"

"What?"

"We both know exactly why you're here so just…" She gestured towards him with her left hand. "Get on with it."

Castle opened his mouth, poised on his lips was a flowery and slightly dramatic speech about their partnership, what it meant to him, and how offended he was that she assumed he only came to see her to find out more about her possible inherence. He was one second away from professing said thoughts when he thought better of it. He could hear the edge in her voice and could not blame her for already being agitated, so he decided not to poke the bear, so to speak.

Lowering his voice, he leaned in close to her and asked softly, "Did you find out more about the twenty million yet?"

She bobbed her head tersely. "It would appear the inheritance is directly tied to me being married; there is no way around it."

"Does that mean you can get married now and still inherit?"

She nodded again. "I have to get married in eight days or forfeit the money."

"Eight days!?" he squeaked, stunned by the limited timeline.

"Yes. Per the will, I must present my birth certificate and marriage license no later than thirty days after the death of Michel Bernard in order to collect my in heritance."

"Michel Bernard?"

"Yes. He's my very, very, very long lost second or third cousin—I forget how it all…works out," she said with a waving arm gesture. Then, she dusted her fingers across her brow and gave him a rather weary half-smile.

Castle felt his heart clench with sympathy for his partner. He could only imagine how stressful this all was for her, and how weighed-down she felt by the decision she had to make, particularly now with the tight timeline. Deciding to stay on the positive end of things as he liked to do, he gave her a reassuring smile and said, "Well, eight days is pretty quick, but it's more than doable. New York state only has a twenty-four hour wait period which means…" He paused to do some quick mental calculations. "You would have up to next Thursday to get the license and still be able to be married in time."

Her brow tightened, almost as though he suggested choosing the first man she bumped into on the subway on the way home to be her future husband. "Yeah, I'm not doing that."

"Really? You're not going to get married for the inheritance?" He asked. Since she did not respond, he took her lack of answer as an affirmative and followed up with, "Why?"

Kate slapped her hands down against her desk and gave him an incredulous look. "Really Castle? Why? You, the man who has shadowed me for the last few _years_, can't figure out why I wouldn't want to get married with just a few days' notice."

Castle cleared his throat to give him a moment to delicately word his answer. Of course he could name at least half a dozen reasons why the Kate Beckett he'd come to know and care about would never agree to such a hasty arrangement under normal circumstances. The fact of the matter was, however: these were _extraordinary_ circumstances. Plus, she was thinking of marriage in a far too traditional way.

"It does have to be a _real_ marriage, Beckett. It would be a fake one and people have those all the time."

She clicked her tongue, annoyed, and muttered, "I'm not having this conversation with you," as she turned back to her computer screen.

He sighed in silent agreement—well, mostly agreement. "Okay, okay—just indulge me for one more question. Please?" he added sweetly. She gave him a dangerous look, but he continued anyway for he knew his question was not overtly offensive. "What happens to the money if you don't get married and accept the inheritance? Do you know?"

"Yes. According to what we discovered, it would simply default back to the French government. Don't!" she snapped the moment his lips separated.

"I—I wasn't going to say anything…" he lied in self-defense.

"But you want to."

He shrugged his left shoulder and confessed, "I was just thinking…You—and, frankly, a lot of people—could make better use of that amount of money than any government ever could."

She grumbled something beneath her breath. When he asked her to repeat what she said, she muttered, "That sounds like my father's main point of argument."

Castle smiled and found himself even more appreciative of the man he'd met briefly two days earlier. "And you still don't want to get married? I assume there's a term limit on the marriage? As in, if you got married and divorced in…three years would you have to give the money back?"

"One year; it's one year."

"One year!" The writer squeaked perhaps a bit louder than he should have. "Three hundred and sixty-five days? Please—take it from an expert who has suffered through two painful marriages; that's _nothing_." Were the term length several years, he could have very easily been swayed against the decision. Certainly, if it was more than five years; that was far too long to disrupt one's life, even if it was for twenty million dollars, but one measly year? It was almost a crime not to accept!

"That's not the point, Castle. I always—" For one moment her expression had softened, then she almost looked startled, as though she was fearful of revealing too much. Instantly, she sat up straighter and placed her palms flat against her desk. In her business-like Detective voice, she said to him, "You know what? Never mind. We are not having this discussion. I am not getting married. I am not inheriting any money. End of story."

Before Castle could even think of a rebuttal to offer, they were interrupted by their approaching colleagues. "What? Are you serious Beckett? You gotta take the money!" Esposito insisted.

Kate's jaw dropped to the approximate position of her mid-chest as she slowly turned to his partner; he swallowed reflexively. "You told them!?" she hissed at him.

"Uhhh…" He hedged, not sure what answer would allow him to live another day. Just because he'd given Kate a reprieve the day before did not mean that he could prevent himself from being curious at all. Around lunchtime he'd texted Ryan what he hoped would be a vague question, but of course there was no subtle way to ask if Beckett had been in any particular mood without being asked "Why" as a follow up, and so he'd told his friend, who evidently passed the word along to the fourth member of their quartet.

"Castle!" Beckett barked at him as she stood up from her seat. She snatched her coffee mug violently off her desk and muttered, "You're unbelievable," at him before stalking off towards the breakroom.

"Shit," the writer muttered under his breath. This was definitely _not_ good.

Obviously still in shock, Esposito continued with, "I can't believe her. I'd marry just about anyone for twenty mil!"

"It is a lot of money," Ryan reasoned. Then, turning to Castle he said, "Sorry we kinda got you in trouble."

Sighing to himself, Castle stood and adjusted his blazer, saying, "Well it's not like I don't get myself into trouble as it is…" Then, after nodding to them, he headed towards the breakroom to do some damage control.

* * *

Kate could feel the blood in her veins boiling just like the dark-brown liquid in the coffee maker before her. Unbelievable—this was just unbelievable! Well, no, actually it was one hundred percent predictable. She should have known that Castle would blab to everyone her personal business. That was one of the reasons she hadn't been sure she would tell him at all! Now, Ryan and Espo knew. LT probably did too, which meant when she didn't get married she would face questions from many people instead of no one, which is what she wanted. Actually, what she really wanted was to not be related to Michel Bernard in the first place, but clearly that was no longer an option.

"Hey Beckett, I"

"DON'T!" She practically screamed as she whipped her head towards the opening breakroom door.

Castle halted immediately and put his hands up in a defensive position with palms facing towards her. "Whoa—armor down, Beckett; I came to apologize to you."

"Oh," she responded tersely. Then, she turned back to the coffee maker. While she did appreciate when he apologized to her, she was more than a little embarrassed about the entire situation and just wanted it to be over—for good.

"I'm sorry for pushing you about this marriage issue, and you're right—I do know you well enough to know that you would never want to get married without very long, very in-depth consideration, but my point was: a marriage to accept the money wouldn't be a _marriage_ per-se. It would be more like a partnership. A three hundred and sixty-five day partnership in order to get twenty million dollars that you could use to change the world."

She scoffed as she pulled the now-filled coffee carafe out of the machine. She glanced over to him before focusing on the liquid she poured into her cup. "That much money isn't going to change the world, Castle."

"You never know until you try. Just…don't close the door too quickly, Beckett. At least give yourself the weekend to think it over. As I said before, you have nearly a week to get married under the deadline. I'm not saying the decision isn't difficult, because of course it is. I don't envy your position one bit. In fact, I'm not sure what I'd do if I was you, but I do know I'd be giving it some very serious consideration."

As much as it pained her to admit, she knew that he had a valid point. While she did not agree that twenty million dollars could change _the world_, she would easily admit to that amount of money being able to change a lot of lives, even in a city as big as New York. Even though she was quite confident that marrying to inherit money was not something she wanted for her life, her partner did have a shockingly reasonable point: perhaps she had not given it quite enough thought.

Turning to face him, she tapped her fingers against her coffee mug and said, "Thanks Castle. I, ah, I appreciate what you're saying and I promise to give it a little more thought."

He smiled genuinely and gave her a slight nod. "Glad to hear it. On that note, I'll get out of your hair. Have a good afternoon, Detective."

She watched him go while chewing on the inside of her lower lip. After lingering in the breakroom for several minutes with most of her focus on the email from her father's lawyer friend she'd read over a dozen times in the prior few days, Kate shook her head and decided that for the next few hours her mind needed to be on her work email inbox. Then, once she was at home, she could think about—okay, obsess over—the inheritance debacle as much as much as she needed to.

She had only taken two steps towards the breakroom exit when Esposito came through the door. She stepped aside to let him by, but instead he stopped and apologized for calling her out on the marriage issue and she thanked him. Before she could walk more than another step towards the door, he added, "I'd do it, you know."

She turned and arched an eyebrow at him. "Excuse me?"

"If you only have to be married for one year to keep the money, I'd marry you with no romantic strings attached. If that's what you wanted, I mean."

She half-laughed, unsure if he was being serious or not. "Thanks…I think."

"The thing of it is," he continued, his voice a bit lower, "we both know who you'll choose to marry if you do decided to do this thing. Still, the offer is on the table."

"I—I…yeah…t-thanks…" She stammered before quickly exiting the breakroom knowing that from how aflame they felt, her cheeks surely would have been turning red. She wasn't sure why, though, particularly since she had no idea what Esposito was referencing; she had absolutely no intentions to get married, so how would she know who she would marry?

"Beckett?"

"Y-Yes?" Startled by the sudden sound of her name, she jumped and splashed some coffee out of her mug; it dripped down onto her boot and she cursed beneath her breath. She then turned to face the uniformed officer who had called her name and said, "Sorry, what is it?"

The young man smiled at here. "There's a call for you on line 4."

"Thanks." She nodded to him and then quickly walked to he desk; there was work to be done.

* * *

**A/N**: I am blown away by the response to the first chapter - thank you all so much! I hope you keep enjoying this story :)


	3. Chapter 3

**THREE**

Standing in front of the door to Castle's loft, Kate Beckett anxiously tapped her right foot against the ground and subconsciously began to chew the inside of her inner lip. When she hit the spot she'd already bitten through, she gasped aloud with discomfort then grumbled with annoyance. She brought her left hand up to rub across the spot from the outside of her lower lip and winced again at the discomfort. Simply put she was a bit of a wreck.

Ever since Castle had left the Twelfth earlier that day, Kate had found herself thinking of her inheritance dilemma quite frequently. While she had work emails to answer and forms to fill out she did a fairly decent job of keeping the persistent thoughts of marriage and a two with seven zeros behind it at bay. After her shift was over, though, she though of it almost continuously. That morning she had been staunchly against the idea of marriage and thus the inheritance, but then something Castle had said really changed her thought process.

Partnership. He had dubbed the relationship she would need to have in order to accept the money a partnership, not a marriage. By the most basic of definitions, any marriage would be considered a partnership, but of course they were partnerships with other considerations like romance and intimacy, which was why she'd almost immediately shut down the notion. However, if whatever marriage she had was exclusively a non-romantic partnership, that certainly opened the door to more thorough consideration.

As the evening wore on, Kate found herself thinking not about her predicament, but instead about her mother. This inheritance was firstly her mother's. Had Johanna's life not been cut tragically short, she would have been there to accept the money, and there would have been absolutely no issue since she was a married woman. As Kate thought about this, she wondered for the first time what her mother might do with the money. At the time of her death, Johanna already worked for a non-profit organization so presumably a good portion of the funds would have been directed towards that. With the inheritance being so high, Kate thought her mother might have even formed another organization or charity to ensure that as many people as possible were helped. She figured Johanna would have set a little aside so she and her father could take a trip—perhaps for their next wedding anniversary—but she was confident her mother would have given the bulk of the money away.

With those thoughts in her mind, Kate found herself once again very conflicted. Perhaps allowing the money to default back to the French government wasn't the right decision. Maybe this inheritance was a way for her to continue her mother's legacy. Perhaps not in the exact way Johanna would have, but with the same spirit, certainly.

More confused than ever and knowing she would never sleep until she talked through some of the turmoil, Kate called the person who had set her down that path in the first place. Naturally, her partner did not hesitate at all to invite her over when she tentatively asked if they could speak in person even though it was later in the evening. Despite the fact that she knew talking with him would most likely benefit her, Kate felt no small amount of nerves during her trek across Manhattan, because when it came right down to it…well, she wasn't quite ready to face that reality yet.

Kate only needed to stand in the hall a few more seconds before the door opened and Castle greeted he with a warm smile. He stepped back to let her inside and reached out to take the jacket she was shrugging off her shoulders. "Thanks for letting me come over even though it's late; I really applicate it."

He hung her coat in the closet and then turned back to her with an easy smile. "Of course, Beckett; that's what partners are for. What is it you wanted to talk about? Your inheritance or something else?"

"Does that change your answer to the question?"

"Not at all; I'm just curious."

She rounded her shoulders with a sigh and then shuffled her way towards the nearby sofa. "I just…I can't stop thinking about it—the inheritance. I really was convinced that I wasn't going to accept it, but now… Now I don't know. Twenty million dollars could do a lot of good for a lot of people here in the city and… and I don't know. Maybe immediately shutting down the idea was me just being too stubborn and close-minded about the whole thing, but at the same time it's my life and I…" Her voice drifted off with a little helpless shrug.

Castle approached with a kind expression. He placed a gentle hand on her right shoulder and gave it a squeeze before gesturing towards the space in front of them. "C'mon. Sit down." Once they were side-by-side, he leaned towards her, balancing his forearms on his thighs, and continued. "There is no wrong answer here, Beckett. If you don't want to be married for a year to get the money, that's not wrong. It's not like no one gets it; it doesn't get lit on fire. I'm sure the French government will use it… for something. And if you do choose to get married and take it, that's not wrong either."

She felt her heart clench with anxiety at the notion. "It wouldn't be…cheating?"

His brow crinkled. "Why would it be cheating?"

"Because the marriage isn't real."

He frowned a little bit and then shook his head. "Well, let's be honest here Beckett—the rules are kind of stupid and archaic. If that's how Michel wrote his will that's how it has to be, but he wrote it in with those oddly specific stipulations—married thirty days after death, married for a full year. It just begs for someone to challenge the system in order to get the money."

Kate grunted in acknowledgement of that point. Ever since she learned of the death of Michel Bernard she had wondered many times why the will had been written the way it was. The best she could conclude was that Michel must have been a very strange, particular man. She also decided that were others in her shoes many of them would not have blinked an eye at marrying someone—a significant other, friend, or, hell, even a stranger—in order to inherit such a bulky sum. Unfortunately for her, neither her brain nor her heart allowed her to make such a decision easily.

Gazing over at her partner, she asked, "So you would do that if you were me? Get married to inherit the money?"

He twisted his lips to the side and gave a little shrug. "I've thought about it, but I'm still not sure what I'd do Beckett. I definitely don't envy your decision and I will support whatever you choose. Though, as I said earlier: twenty million is a lot of money that could do a lot of good."

She used his reference to their earlier chat as the jumping off point for what she really came to his apartment to discuss. "I…I was thinking about what you said before—that this marriage wouldn't be any sort of traditional marriage, but it would be more like a partnership. Perhaps even like a business agreement."

"Sure, it could work that way."

"But…I mean, in order to fulfil the clause of the will, the marriage would still have to appear legitimate to the outside world."

He nodded. "Seems a fair assumption."

"Right…so then…God!" she groaned and raked both her hands back through her hair. "I need a drink…"

"Sure." He popped off the couch immediately at her comment and walked across the room to his office. A minute later, he returned with two fingers of whiskey for both of them. After placing hers into her hand, he sat, took a sip of his own, and then said, "You know…I don't mind at all that you're here talking this over with me—truly, not at all—but I am curious: have you said anything to Josh about this?"

Feeling a little startled, Kate almost choked on the whiskey still in her throat. "J-Josh?" she stammered. "I…I haven't spoken to him in over a month."

Castle's eyes flared wide. "What? You're not…I thought…"

Kate shook her head simply. It was entirely her fault that he was confused, for she had not mentioned the breakup to anyone after it happened. The whole thing was rather…odd. She was actually surprised about how much she didn't feel at what was effectively the end of their half-year-long relationship. Clearly, that was an indicator that she probably should not have been in the relationship for that duration of time in the first place, but when it came to matters of the heart…well, she knew Castle was not exactly an impartial judge.

"We…well, we decided to take a break, but I think we both know its pretty permanent. Besides, even if we were still together, I don't think he would support getting married to take the money." She, of course, had no evidence to back up that statement as clearly this scenario was not one that came up in regular conversation, but from what she knew about Josh, that's what her gut told her.

"Not even if you promised to give all the money to Doctors Without Borders?"

Kate laughed at this unexpected comment. "Well, maybe then."

They sat in silence for a minute before Castle's brow wrinkled again. "Hang on so… So if you're not wish Josh, then clearly he's not the one you're thinking of marring for this inheritance partnership."

"No, I'm not."

"So, then who did you have in mind?"

Kate's stomach rolled over so violently in her gut Kate feared she might vomit. Instead, she shut her eyes, took in a deep breath, and exhaled, "Espo offered."

Castle hummed. "Not surprised; he said he'd marry just about anyone for the money if it was his inheritance."

"I'm sure…" Kate downed the last of her drink and placed the empty glass on the coffee table. She folded her hands in her lap and trapped her lower lip between her teeth once more as her heart began to pound in her chest. The fact of the matter was: if she was going to have a "partnership marriage" with someone in order to accept the inheritance, it had to be someone that she trusted implicitly. She also had to be able to tolerate being in that person's life for at least one year's time. She needed someone kind and understanding and caring for them as a friend would certainly be preferable. She thought through every person she knew, but when it came down to it only one person checked all the boxes.

"Castle?"

"Yeah?"

"What…what if I asked you?"

The writer truly had an impeccable poker face, for he did not react at all to her question. She almost would have thought he expected her to ask, except if he thought she was still with Josh, that would have been unlikely. Still, he remained calm and quiet—eerily so—for over ten seconds before he asked with extreme sincerity, "Well, that depends—how much money would you give me?"

Immediately irritated, Kate pushed herself off the couch and snipped, "Forget it!" but before she could take a step away, he grabbed her hand and pulled her back towards the couch.

"Hey, c'mon; I'm teasing you!" Despite his smile, she still felt rather annoyed, though she wasn't sure why as his response was one hundred percent predictably Castle. Once she was sitting beside him again, he continued. "Okay…_if_ you were asking me to marry you so you could inherit that money, I…I suppose that would be something I would be interested in discussing the logistics of."

The business-like tone in his answer both confused and startled her as it sounded very unlike her partner. Then, after another moment's thought, she supposed she understood. She was not blind to the fact that Castle had a…well, a crush on her. She didn't like to acknowledge or think about it, but at the same time she would not deny not—not with such a complex situation before them. Given that, she could understand why he might be hesitant to jump into marrying her without further discussion, especially since legitimate feelings could be involved.

At that thought, Kate felt the anxiety bubble up within her again and she hopped of the couch and began to pace through the room. "God—we cannot do this. We can't even talk about doing this!"

He stood slowly and approached with arched brow. "Why not?"

"Because we…we…we can't!" She insisted, throwing her hands out to the sides. The whole concept was utterly ridiculous. She could not marry someone in this short of time period—not even for twenty million dollars.

"Hang on, hang on. Let's just think about this for a minute okay? This whole marriage thing would be a partnership and we're already partners. As you said, we'd have to appear married to the outside world, but that's okay, because I have a spare bedroom upstairs that you could stay in so that you still have your own space. Though, to be fair, you would have to share a bathroom with Alexis…"

"And your mother."

"No, mother's room has an en-suite."

"Oh."

"I might be able to get her to move out, if I buy her another place…"

"What? No. You—you can't do that to your mother. And I can't share a bathroom with Alexis. I mean—I can't disrupt her like that." Kate stood from the couch and wiped her hand over her mouth as the crazy logistics of her potential suggestion really began to hit her. "God, I didn't even think about their lives and how they'd be flipped upside-down. We cannot do this!"

"Now you're just looking for excuses," he pointed out. "I won't deny that it would be a slight change for them, but nothing terribly dramatic. They'd be fine."

She looked at him, still finding herself in disbelief—not to mention highly confused and stressed. "Are you sure? And even if they were, that's not the point; there are so many other complications other than living together. We—we'd be in each other's lives every day."

He quirked his lips to the side. "We kind of already are."

She shook her head and gazed at him genuinely as she slowly sunk back down onto the couch. "But this isn't the same—we'd have to make it look like we're married."

"I don't think that would be that challenging."

"But if we look like we're married…we…we couldn't date other people," she said almost with slight surprise, for she had not thought of that element of complexity until that exact moment.

His eyes widened signaling that he hadn't thought of that either. "Oh…well, yes I suppose that would be true…"

Upon further consideration, Kate backtracked on her previous statement. "Maybe not. I mean married people have affairs and since we're not actually together I wouldn't-"

"No." He cut her off firmly. "That's not me—especially not after what I went through with both my marriages. If we're married, then we're married."

Kate did not often think about how both Castle's previous wives had cheated on him, but in that moment the knowledge of his prior relationships had never made her sadder. For all his faults, Castle was a truly good man, particularly to those he carried about. She could only imagine him as a romantic partner. Sure, he might be overzealous to the point of annoying sometimes, but she could not imagine he wouldn't being kind and caring, especially not with how big his heart was. The fact that two women had stepped out on him seemed practically implausible to her. Perhaps, in some way, it was to him as well, since he was clearly still singed by the actions if he was insisting upon being faithful in a marriage that wasn't even real to begin with.

Giving her head a little shake with disbelief she said, "You would go a year without dating anyone to get…nothing in return? I can't ask you to do that."

"You're not; I'm volunteering."

She clicked her tongue at him. "You're insane."

He laughed. "But you already knew that, Beckett. Besides—aren't you volunteering yourself to go a year without dating?"

"Yes…" she said slowly as, again, she had not thought of it that way, but truly she didn't mind that much. It certainly would not be the first time. Besides, there was one key difference in their situations, "But I do get twenty million dollars."

"Touché."

"So…what…what I'm hearing from you is that if I really asked you, you'd consider doing this."

"No." He let a beat go by and then added, "If you're really asking me, I would say yes."

Her heart fluttered beneath her rips and Kate found it suddenly difficult to draw breath. She turned away from him to get her bearings before turning back and saying, "I need to think more about this."

"Of course."

"I'm going to need some time…"

"Sure."

"At least a day."

"I'm not rushing you."

"No, I know; I know. I just…" She huffed out a breath and gazed at him. As the word "husband" floated through her mind, she felt her whole body twitch and knew she had obsessed over the notion too much for one evening. She needed to try and sleep and tackle the idea again the following day, after she had some distance from it. "Thank you for even entertaining this idea, for being my partner."

"Always, Kate."

She gave him a small smile and said, "I'll call you, okay?"

"Sure. Want me to call you a car?"

"No, no. I'll be fine," she said. Then, she took her coat and walked out into the hall, somehow knowing "fine" was no where near what she was feeling at that exact moment.

* * *

**A/N**: thanks for all your reviews :) so glad everyone is enjoying this!


	4. Chapter 4

**FOUR**

Castle stared across the dinner table at the two most important people in his life. He wore a hopeful smile having expected laughter or perhaps even a bit of lighthearted ribbing after he told them about the possibility that he and Kate might be wed within a week. Instead, they looked confused (which was to be expected) but also a little distraught. And definitely upset.

"Guys, c'mon—nobody's dying. Quite the opposite in fact!" He continued in the hopes of turning their frowns into smiles, but he was entirely unsuccessful.

"Dad, this is…I just…I cannot even believe you are considering this!" Alexis spat out, her face as incredulous as he'd ever seen it.

"Why do you say that? Beckett is my partner. And my friend."

"But…but she didn't ask you to help her move. Or loan her some money. She asked you to marry her."

"But it's a fake marriage."

"That makes it even weirder!" the young red-head insisted.

"Richard, if I may," his mother began, and Castle turned to look in her direction. "This situation is certainly most unexpected, but I believe that our main concern is that…well, do you really think this is a good idea considering your feelings."

Castle blinked at her. "What feelings?"

"Your feelings for Detective Beckett."

"I'm sure I have no idea to what you're referring," he responded casually, immediately avoiding her gaze. Suddenly he flashed back to his seventh year of life when his mother arrived home from play rehearsals to a passed-out babysitter (the eighty-plus-year-old Mrs. Inez hadn't made it past her first re-run of Perry Mason) and a broken lamp on the floor. Young Richard had insisted that he had no idea how the lamp had been shattered, all the while hoping his mother didn't notice the soccer ball—the one he was explicitly told not to play with in the house—jammed behind the sofa.

"Oh, Dad—come on!" Alexis insisted, throwing her hands up in the air.

His mother implored him with a gentler approach, "Richard, darling, please. If you're not going to be honest with us, at least be honest with yourself about why you're doing this. We don't want you to get hurt."

"Hurt?" he laughed off the notion. "I won't get hurt. This is just a continuation of the same partnership we've had for years with just a slight expansion; I'll be fine."

"Will you? Do you think it's possible on some level that you think Beckett might…that being married might spark real feelings between the two of you?"

He cleared his throat and suddenly became intently interested in wiping up all the crumbs around his dinner plate. "Really? I, um, hadn't thought of it that way…"

"Oh, Richard…" she sighed and Castle felt the back of his neck prickle uncomfortably. He brought his left hand up to skim along his hairline and then stood up from the table. After dropping his napkin beside his plate, he began to pace the area behind his chair.

The prior day when Kate had asked to come over and speak with him about something, he assumed it was about the inheritance and he was all too happy to talk through her about the situation. They were, after all, very good friends. He figured that her desire to speak more about the issue meant she was actually somewhat seriously considering taking the money and he was pleased about that. The only concern he had before her arrival was that at one point she would ask his opinion about whether or not she should marry Josh for the inheritance, and he certainly dreaded such a question for he knew he could not answer impartially. Kate marrying Josh would effectively nail shut the coffin containing his hope for their future relationship and such a blow would be devastating. Thankfully, that had not happened at all.

Castle was genuinely shocked to learn that Kate and Josh were no longer together. Shocked in a pleasant way, of course, since it was certainly the outcome he desired. As his brain fully comprehended that Doctor Motorcycle Boy was out of the picture most likely for good, he began to process a different—and delightful—alternative. Was it possible that Kate sought his council on the decision because he was the man she would ask to enter into the marriage contract?

Given all that they'd been through, Castle could hardly believe that Kate asking him would even be possible, yet a few minutes later he found out that it was, and it was one of the happiest moments of his life. It took every ounce of self-control to keep his straight face and thus be able to tease her, but it had been worth it in order to lightened her stressful mood. Naturally, that had been his goal all along; it was one of the tasks he continuously took on without second thought. As much as he'd wanted to jump off the couch and drag her down to the courthouse that very second, he did acknowledge that there were some serious considerations that needed taken into account, so it was good she wanted another day to think about the decision; ultimately, he had needed one as well.

At first, Castle forced himself to think through the situation logically. With her boyfriend out of the picture, her was one of the men closest to her at that point in her life. They had been friends for years. He was also single. Of course, those same factors could also be said about Esposito, yet she had seemingly turned down his offer to marry her. In Castle's mind, that had to mean something—it _had_ to.

When it came right down to it, he had to begrudgingly admit that his mother had a point. He had considered that perhaps Beckett did have romantic feelings for him as well and wanted to use their ruse of a marriage as a sort of litmus test for a real relationship. They knew a lot about each other, but not in the day-to-day sense. Perhaps once she saw that their good rapport extended into domesticity, she would see him more as a life-long partner. If that was truly the case, he was fully confident in his ability to literally and figuratively charm the pants off her. She only needed to give him the chance and, from the sound of their last phone call, she truly was leaning in that direction, which was why he'd decided to tell his family. Clearly, they were a bit more intuitive than he anticipated them being, which was both nice and annoying.

Huffing out a breath, Castle grabbed on to the back of the chair he'd vacated and gazed at his mother and daughter in turn. "Fine…you got me. I promise you that I'm not fixated on it or counting on it but…is it really the craziest thing to imagine? We've been partners for years and we've always had a sort of…flirty chemistry that could easily become more. And this—_this_—invites "more" so much it's practically a parade to more and she…she came to _me_. She asked _me_. And Beckett just doesn't do things like that... It has to mean something."

"That you're her friend. That she trusts you," Alexis pointed out.

"Of course. I just…" He sighed and let his chin drop down to his chest.

He heard one of the chairs push out from the table and a moment later he felt his mother's slender hand across his shoulder. "You just want her to feel the same way that you do."

He gazed at her with a sad smile and confessed, "Yeah, I really do."

His mother rubbed his arm. "I'm not saying it's impossible darling, just…try not to get hurt."

He smiled and bobbed his head, "Thank you, Mother." Then turning back to his daughter, he asked for confirmation, "Are you sure you're okay with Beckett moving in? Assuming she decides to go through with this, that is."

She shrugged. "I suppose. I mean, it's only for about a year, right? And I don't have any problems with Beckett. Honestly I think I'd rather her move in than Gina again."

"Ohhh," he sighed out, wincing slightly. "Too soon."

She laughed. "Sorry."

"And you Mother?"

Martha shrugged. "Katherine is a lovely girl and I have no issue with it—I just hope she knows what she's getting into."

"When it comes to your play reversals? Probably not."

His mother gave him a look then prodded his shoulder with her fingernail. "That is not what I meant in the least and you know it."

He nodded. "I know, but…honestly? Between the marriage and the money, I'm not sure she would have a full idea of what she's getting herself into, but if there's anyone who can get through it, it's Beckett."

He knew it would be a full life change for her; that was unavoidable, but he also knew that she was the strongest, smartest, and, yes, most stubborn person he knew. She would make it through, and he would be there to help her in any way that he could.

* * *

"So I guess…when it comes right down to it: I can't stop thinking about my mom." Kate stopped pacing almost directly in front of Castle, shrugged her shoulders, and tucked her arms across her chest. Once again she had shown up later in the evening at his apartment to talk through her latest thoughts on the inheritance issue. That time, she had not bothered with any sort of propriety and shown up in the black yoga pants and NYPD hoodie she'd been wearing all day while she cleaned, did laundry, and obsessed over her future. No matter how many times she went back and forth or tried to talk herself in or out of a decision, she always ended back in the same place.

Looking him in the eye, she concluded what had been a nearly ten-minute-long soliloquy with, "This was supposed to be her inheritance and I…I know she would have taken it and done a lot of good with it, so I should do that too…right?"

To his full credit, Castle had been as patient and understanding as she could have ever hoped for. He'd even silently passed her a box of tissues when she started to tear up at one point when talking about her mother's work while she was alive, and how she could continue that mission. She never really doubted his kindness but seeing how wonderful he was being then further reinforced her decision to choose him as her fake, temporary husband.

"That's a very altruistic thought, Kate, and I completely understand why you might feel that way, but your circumstances are still very different. Specifically: your mother would not have had to change anything about her life to accept the money."

She nodded and sat on the couch diagonal to where he sat on the chair. "I understand that, but I…I still want to. I think it's the right thing. Well, no I don't…" She sighed and raked her hands back through her hair, before bringing them down so she could prop her chin on her fist and her elbow on her thigh. "I don't know if it's the right thing. I don't know if either decision is right, but I think after several days of thinking, this is the one I'm most okay with."

He gave her a small smile. "Then it's the one you should go with."

She gave a soft smile back and then sat up straighter, moving her hands so that they were folded together in her lap. "So, I guess that brings me to: are you still on board with all this?"

"Yeah; yeah, definitely."

"Then…we're getting married…" The words leaving her lips caused her heart to flutter, but she could not quite tell if it was due to nerves or anticipation. Probably both.

He smiled. "So it would appear."

At the twinkle she caught in his eye, a nervous laugh escaped Kate's lips. Never in her wildest dreams would she have imagined this scenario for her wedding. As much as it was nerve-wracking, in that moment it did feel a little bit thrilling, though she knew the reality of it all could easily sink them, so they needed to be prepared. "Oh my god…okay wait we—we need to figure out some ground rules if we're going to do this thing." When she moved towards her purse, the writer let out a dramatic moan, and she asked, "What?"

"Nothing…you're just making me feel like I'm at Black Pawn about to sign a contract."

"Well…," she began as she pulled out a folded sheet of paper from out of the depths of her bag. Each time she'd thought about something with regards to her for-the-purpose-of-inheritance marriage, she'd written it down so that she would not forget. The only way she felt comfortable doing this was if they were organized and both on the same page. Returning to the couch, she held it up in front of her with the confession, "that is is kind of what I had in mind."

"Beckett!" he groaned, sounding like the little boy she was forcing to do his math homework before he could go out and play.

She sat down an unfolded the sheet of notes in her lap. "C'mon, Castle. I really think this is best for both of us. Just—just hear me out, okay? One – I'm moving into the loft to live in the guest room. Should we have some sort of schedule for sharing the common areas?"

He looked utterly horrified. "If you make me make a schedule, I won't marry you."

"I'm just trying to make sure we're on the same page up front."

He groaned and leaned back in his chair. Kate for the first time imagined if this was what he was like during his Black Pawn business meetings. If that was the case (and she guessed that it was) she now had slightly more respect for Gina. "What's there not to be clear about?" he continued. "We're getting married, but not having sex –I've done this twice before; I know the drill."

She gave him a look. "I'm being serious!"

"So am I. Mi casa es su casa, Beckett. We all share the common space. If you want your own shelf in the pantry, I can arrange that, but it's really not that big of a deal to me."

"You're sure?" she asked; he nodded, so she moved to the next bullet point on her list. "Okay, well, I figured that if we were getting married for real like we're supposed to be for this inheritance, I would theoretically be selling my apartment…except, we're not getting married for real and I like my apartment so I kind of want it back."

"Sub-let?"

She nodded. "Yeah that's what I was thinking. I'd leave all my furniture, of course, but I'd have to get the rest of the stuff out of there like books, off-season clothes, and all my other personal belongings…"

He rubbed his hand over his jaw, considering. "Well, the guest room closet isn't that big, but we don't use much of the storage space in the basement. I don't know about all your stuff fitting down there, but whatever doesn't we can store in the Hamptons house."

She nearly winced, hating for him to go to all that trouble. "Are you sure?"

He shrugged. "It's no big deal. Most of our extra stuff is stored out there. Plus, I need to go out and check it at least once this month so it's not a big deal."

"Thank you. Next…um, what about our illusion of being married to the public. I'll be living here and changing my marital status at work…"

"Wedding rings?"

"Oh—oh gosh I hadn't thought of that!" she half-laughed, surprised she'd missed such a fairly significant detail.

He waved his hand casually. "Let me take care of that."

"Oh, you don't-"

"It's no big deal," he promised with a smile. "Just get me your ring size…or a ring that fits you. I have a good jewelry guy. You're okay with platinum right?"

She felt her cheeks flush at that unnecessary expense. "White gold would be more than sufficient."

"Says the woman about to inherit twenty mil," he said with a teasing smile.

She ignored his comment. "What else to make sure we look married?"

"Well…I assume that you would be my date to any Black Pawn or other events I attend."

She nodded and drummed her fingertips against her knees. "That's fair. I can definitely do that—within reason."

He quirked his eyebrow at her. "You mean you're not joining me at the New York Nudist Society outing?"

"Gross. No."

He laughed. "I don't even know if that's a thing."

"It probably is."

"Probably." He echoed. Before she could move on to her next bullet point, he said, "I have something."

"Great!" she responded, glad to see that he was participating equally. She would have definitely felt less comfortable if they reached the end of their discussion and he had not brought up one point.

He cleared his throat and leaned his forearms against his thighs. "So, at our wedding…we'll have to kiss."

Kate felt her cheeks heat with his comment as she had not really thought about that part of the wedding before. He was entirely correct, though, which certainly amplified her embarrassment. "Ah, yes. Yes, I suppose that is customary."

"Well…is that where you want our first kiss to be? When we're man and wife?"

Kate let out a nervous laugh, as that concept made them sound as though they were in some sort of religious cult. "Um, no. Probably not."

"Right. So then did you want to…" He gestured between them and then half-stood up from his seat.

Realizing he intended to kiss her right then, Kate immediately felt a cold sweat break out across her body. God, what was wrong with her? She'd kissed plenty of men before. Why did the thought of kissing Castle in the middle of his living room feel so…unsettling? "Ah, yeah, okay…" With this confirmation, he moved over to sit beside her and immediately leaned her face towards hers. Feeling too overwhelmed by the moment, she reached out and braced her hand against his shoulder, muttering, "Ah, sorry—hold on."

Looking more amused than ever, he said, "It's fine." Then he remained still, clearly wanting her to initiate if she was the one feeling nervous.

With a "rip the bandage off" attitude, Kate leaned in for a quick peck, but Castle surprised her by bringing his hand up to cradle her jaw and effectively hold her against him. Though their lips touched briefly at first, a moment later he parted his and kissed her again. She kissed him back but refused to allow herself to find any enjoyment in the moment, though she very easily could have. That was not what the kiss was about, though; this was a business arrangement.

When they separated again, Castle smiled at her and said, "That was nice."

She looked at him for a moment, unsure of what to say, so she said nothing and instead cleared her throat and turned back to the important subject at hand. "So uh, speaking of the marriage: we only have a few days."

"Right. Well, if we get the license sometime tomorrow morning, we can get married Tuesday afternoon; we only have to wait twenty-four hours."

"We—oh, shoot! Wait." She clapped her hand over her forehead, having forgotten about her busy schedule until just that moment. "I have a seminar all day Tuesday; I can't miss it."

"We'll get married Wednesday then."

"Yeah. That'll work."

"Great; I'll call first thing Monday morning to make sure there are times available. Otherwise…I guess we can fly to Vegas if we need to," he said with an impish smirk.

She moved to laugh, but then felt her belly flutter with nerves. "Oh…this is feeling much more real…"

"You can still change your mind."

"Don't say that—I might…"

"Then you should, Beckett." He moved his hand to rest on her knee and gazed at her very seriously. "If you're not one hundred percent certain this is what you want, you should change your mind."

She shook her head. In this scenario, she knew there was no way to be one hundred percent certain either way, but she had made her decision and she was going to stick with it. "No, I am. I am. I'm just…nervous, aren't you? I mean, I could say the same thing to you. you don't have to do this."

"I agreed to it."

"But you can un-agree. I mean…do you really want to end up with three divorces?"

He shrugged casually. "I'm a celebrity—many divorces will add to my mystique."

"I'm serious!"

"So am I. I'm in this, Beckett." He gazed at her steadily and said, "Partners in everything—at least for the next twelve months."

She smiled, feeling reassured by his warm gaze. "Okay…and thank you; thank you for doing this."

He blinked, slow and easy, and gave her knee a squeeze. "Always."


	5. Chapter 5

**FIVE**

On Monday morning, Kate Beckett sat down at her desk with a clear head and a determined attitude. She had three and a half hours to get through her emails, attend one morning briefing, and begin her court prep for the next week. Then, she would be interrupted by an extra-long and unusually early lunch break, so she needed to get as much done as she could before she left the office at disrupted the flow of her day.

She took a sip from the take-away cup of coffee she'd purchased on her way in, logged on to her computer, and set to work, only to be interrupted less than five minutes later when Ryan and Esposito approached her desk looking equal parts curious and concerned.

"Morning Beckett. Did you have a nice weekend?" Ryan asked.

She glanced at each of them in turn before saying, "It was fine; how was yours?"

"Oh…uninteresting. I…" he hesitated, looked at his partner, and then back to her, "I don't, um, see a wedding ring on your finger. Or are you not wearing a ring?"

Folding her fingers together she said, "Why would I be wearing a wedding ring? I'm not married."

Esposito arched his eyebrow curiously and glanced over at Ryan in a way that indicated they may have placed some sort of wager on that knowledge and he was the winner. "Really? You didn't elope with anyone…"

"No. I did not."

Ryan huffed and rounded his shoulders, his disappointment clear. "Really, Beckett? You're not going to take the money. Not judging!" He quickly raised up his hands defensively and took a half-step back from her, presumably at her narrowing gaze. "I'm not judging, I promise. It's your choice, but…are you really not taking it?"

Kate huffed out a breath. "You're right, it is my choice, but…as it happens, I will be taking an early lunch break to do down to the court house and apply for a marriage license."

Ryan practically levitated with glee. "Really? Who with? It's Castle, right? You're going to marry Castle for the money?"

"Dude, chill," Esposito told his partner. Ryan then gave him a perturbed look.

Kate fought to keep a straight face through this exchange, but it was nice to see that someone was extremely excited for her impending nuptials. Over the prior twenty-four hours she'd come to fully accept the decision she made. She was certain she had absolutely no idea what she was about to experience—twelve months living with three Castles. That alone had disaster potential written all over it. She didn't think she'd be _miserable_. They were, after all, very nice people; however, she wasn't sure she would ever achieve a high level of comfort. The living arrangement, and legalities of marriage, were simply a means to an end. She was going to do almost twenty-million dollars' worth of good and that was a worthy exchange.

"Yes," she confirmed and Ryan punched the air with glee, proclaiming, "I knew it!"

"To be clear," Kate continued, "Castle and I are just continuing our platonic partnership. This is really more like a business arrangement than a marriage."

Esposito scoffed. "You sure about that, chica?"

"Of course. We've already agreed to it and discussed ground rules and everything. Though," she lowered her voice before continuing, "so as not to disrupt any of this process, I would prefer that you keep this to yourself. We…our goal is to look like a real couple."

"Uh huh…so we're supposed to just pretend that you were dating him and that doctor guy at the same time?"

Kate opened her mouth to respond, but nothing came out other than a slightly choked sound. Shit! She had not entirely thought through that cover story, had she? Well, it was too late now. She only had to hope that Michel Bernard's legal team did not look too closely into her recent past. "No comment," she said instead.

The two male detectives exchanged skeptical looks then Esposito added, "Do we at least get to be there when you tell Montgomery?"

Kate nearly snorted with laughter. "I'm not telling Montgomery." She and Castle needed to appear legally married to the important parties only. They weren't going to make any big announcements to draw attention to themselves; they weren't going to have any type of celebration at all. She was going to wear her wedding ring until the money came through, and then she probably wouldn't unless she and Castle were attending a Black Pawn event as a couple or something.

Unless… did not actively appearing like a couple mean that she might have to forfeit the money? Would Michel Bernard's lawyers be spying on her? No, surely not. That sounded like some twisted movie plot. But…would they?

"Really? You're not telling Montgomery? You don't think he might be a little bit surprised when he gets notification that one of his employees is now married. Particularly if that employee is you."

"Who would tell him?"

"HR."

Kate cursed under her breath. Yes, technically she did need to let the HR department know about her change in marital status, and she had every intention to do so. She had not quite thought about the fact that Montgomery could then find out as well, and it certainly would not reflect well on her if he discovered her lie-by-omission. Grumbling even more, Kate pushed herself out of her desk chair, walked past her smirking partners, and over to the captain's office, where he was just settling in for the morning.

She tapped her knuckles against the doorframe of his office. "Sorry to bother you this early, sir, but could I have just a moment of your time?"

The elder man smiled and beckoned her. "Of course; come on in."

Kate took a few steps inside, clasped her hands in front of her, and said, "This isn't really a work-related issue, but I wanted to make you aware all the same. I'm getting married on Wednesday."

Montgomery blinked at her. He was silent for around ten seconds before he said slowly, "I…don't get the joke."

"It's not a joke, Sir. I'm eloping. Kind of. It's not really a big deal, but I wanted to tell you myself before you heard it anywhere else, like from HR."

"Hang on." He continued when she moved to step away. "You're getting married…may I ask to whom?"

"Ah…" She hesitated and almost winced while saying the next word. "Castle."

The captain's face relaxed into a smirk. "Okay, now you're joking."

"No," she said, the word sounding like a half-moan, half sigh. "No; I'm not joking."

"You and Castle are getting married?"

"Yes."

"You and Richard Castle?"

"Yes."

Montgomery stood up from his desk, leaned his hands against it, and gazed at her very seriously. "Beckett."

Her heart began to beat a bit faster beneath her ribcage as she innocently replied, "Hmm?"

"You want to explain what the hell is going on?"

"I…don't really think I need to, sir. Castle and I have been partners for quite some time now, as your well aware. And, we…we decided to getting married."

He shook his head. "I don't buy it."

Kate huffed and dropped her gaze to the floor. Well of course he didn't get it—and neither would anyone else, she imagined. At least, not anyone who knew her even a little bit. "It is…quite complicated, but we've decided to get married."

"Because you're in love?"

"Sure," she replied as a bit of sweat formed on her brow.

Montgomery groaned and said her name like he was the child she was scolding. "Beckett!"

Kate sighed and shut her eyes, cursing internally. She hated the options that were before her as neither painted her in a good light. She was either the crazy person who had decided to marry her platonic partner on a whim for seemingly no reason at all after previously showing no romantic inclinations towards him _or_ she was the potentially shallow woman marrying a friend to inherit twenty million dollars, which she knew no matter how much she claimed she would give away, people would probably think otherwise. The later scenario would sound more plausible to those that knew her, but it came with the difficulty of revealing that their marriage was effectively a sham; a fact she did not want to make too public. Thus, she was stuck looking crazy.

"I'm sorry sir; it is very complicated. Please don't make me explain more than that."

Montgomery stared at her for the better part of thirty seconds before finally bobbing his head and agreeing. "Okay Beckett. Should I congratulate you?"

"I'm not sure that's necessary," she muttered.

"Okay well…let me know where you're registered."

Kate felt her face flush and she quickly held up her hands in protestation. "Oh no, we're not—no. No gifts, no reception…this is very low-key."

Again, Montgomery stared. "Are you sure you're okay, Beckett?"

Though it was very difficult, Kate plastered a fake smile on her face and said, "Yes, sir. I'm fine. Just wanted to let you know."

"Okay…thanks…," he said in a tone that remained very uncertain.

Then, Kate turned, and walked back to her desk while shaking her head. God, what a mess! And it had barely even begun…

* * *

Castle walked up to the jeweler's front door, reached out his arm towards the door handle, but then paused just before his hand connected. He took a step back, dropped his arm down to his side, and gazed a bit wistfully at the display window showing a feminine mannequin hand draped with rings, bracelets, and other shiny objects. He drifted towards the display window so as not to block the door while his chest tightened with an undefined emotion.

That morning when he awoke Castle had gotten out of bed with a purpose. Though he usually liked to ease into his Monday mornings (unless there was already an active murder investigation, of course) that morning he had errands to run and the last thing he wanted to do was let his partner down. Since she was working, and already clearly stressed from the difficult decision she had to make, he promised to take care of everything he conceivably could for their wedding. Top on his list was their wedding bands, which was why he planned to be at his favorite jewelry store shortly after they opened at ten.

When he left his apartment, he'd been more mission-focused than anything else, but now that he was in front of the shop he felt…conflicted. He wasn't sad; that definitely wasn't the right term. Marrying Kate would surely be an adventure beyond his wildest expectations. He hoped it would work out for them; he hoped they would not end up splitting up after a year. Even if they did, he was certain they would become better friends as a result of this development in their partnership, and he supposed there was nothing really wrong with that outcome either.

As he stood on the sidewalk for another moment, he determined the unsettled feeling in his chest was more just the acceptance that he truly was marrying someone as part of a ruse, which was certainly different than his previous relationships. Did he care about Kate? Certainly. He might have even gone as far as to say he was teetering on the edge of being in love with her, but he wasn't head-over-heels, besotted with love as he felt a man should be when he went to purchase a ring. When he'd purchased Meredith's and Gina's rings, he'd certainly felt at least a little bit of that delirium. This was merely…different. Not bad, just different. And, admittedly, would probably take some getting used to. It hadn't yet been forty-eight hours since the official decision was made, after all.

Sucking in a deep breath, Castle entered the store and scanned his eyes across the small-but-sparklingly space until he spotted an employee behind a nearby counter. The man was short with dark colored glasses and a salt-and-pepper goatee. Castle estimated him to be several years older than himself. Putting on his public-appearance smile, he approached the man at the counter.

"Can I help you, sir?"

"Yes, you can. I'm looking for wedding bands, please."

"Excellent sir. Congratulations."

"Thank you," Castle nodded, knowing he needed to keep up the persona of a man actually head-over-heels for his fiancée.

The clerk eyed him curiously for a moment before saying, "I see that you don't have your partner with you today. Are you concerned about matching an engagement ring?"

"Ah," he hesitated for a moment before saying quickly, "She doesn't have one. Long story."

The man nodded. "Not a problem, sir. May I ask you budget?"

"No budget, but I've been instructed not to get anything fancy—just simple. Platinum, but simple." Specifically, Kate had told him that if he returned with anything covered in diamonds or any other gems, she would shoot him. Though he knew she was joking (probably), he didn't want to test the waters.

"Understood sir." The man then gestured for Castle to follow him as he walked around to the correct portion of the store.

"I also need something in stock…" Castle added as they walked. "We're getting married this Wednesday."

The man skimmed his fingers over his goatee and said, "May I ask the time Wednesday? Some of these items will ship overnight from the warehouse. We could have it available for you to pick up when the store opens Wednesday morning…assuming that will give you enough time to get to the ceremony. That is—if you want, sir."

Castle smiled and nodded his head, glad he had booked the time at the courthouse before coming to the jewelry store. "Oh, thank you; that's very good to know. The wedding is at one-thirty, so that would work. Let me just see what you have in stock and we'll go from there."

"Very good, sir."

Castle listened only distantly as the jeweler showed him the selection of men's bands. He'd already had two of them so he knew he wasn't interested in beveled edges or anything else overly fancy. He knew Kate wouldn't want anything too decorated, either, but her fingers were so slender he decided upon a slimmer, lower profile ring that he felt she would feel comfortable wearing all day at work.

When the man went to check if their rings were in stock in the back of the store, Castle could not help but drift over to gaze down at the display of engagement rings. When he'd picked Meredith's ring out, his budget had still been quite meager (much to Meredith's disappointment), so picking a ring had been a stressful endeavor of finding something for her finicky taste while managing his sticker-shock. For Gina, it had been the exact opposite. Not only had she insisted upon choosing her own ring, but she had also made it clear she expected him to pay as much as he could reasonably afford. Given that she was his employer's representative, she certainly knew how to push that number to its maximum penny.

Though in the aftermath of his second divorce Castle had insisted he would most likely never marry again, deep down he'd never believed that to be true. He wanted to share his life with someone and after two unsuccessful attempts, he felt reasonably confident his third would be the one that stuck. He'd even briefly thought about what it would be like to buy that next engagement ring in order to surprise the woman he loved most. He knew that he would imagine her smile and the light in her eyes and the way she hugged him tight after that ring was on her finger.

Standing there, Castle found it hard not to briefly think about what kind of ring he would buy for Kate. Something classic and elegant, not at all gaudy. Something…meaningful. Yes, she would like that. If he could find a way to symbolize what they had together. He wasn't quite sure how he would do that, but if he decided to propose to her for real, he knew he'd figure it out.

"Good news sir."

Castle looked up when the employee came out of the back with a grin across his face.

"Both rings are in stock. Just give me a few moments to box them up for you and then I'll ring you up."

"Excellent; thank you." Castle nodded, then gave one final look towards the engagement rings before moving towards the register.

Maybe one day he would revisit them with her in mind. Maybe he wouldn't, but one thing he knew for sure: when it came to his partnership with Beckett, he knew anything was possible.


	6. Chapter 6

**SIX**

Standing up on her tip-toes, Kate pulled two wine glasses off a shelf in the cabinet next to her sink, nudged he door closed with the back of her hand, and then placed both glasses delicately on to the counter. She then turned, snagged the last bit of her takeout panini, popped it into her mouth, and leaned back against the counter with a sigh. She should not have been this tired, yet she was; she truly was. She hadn't chased perps or canvassed in freezing cold or overly hot weather. All she'd done was sit in a conference room for eight hours listening to presentations or watching videos on a large projection screen. Theoretically that should not have been tiring, but the material had been dry and the room stuffy with an odd smell, all of which combined into a long, draining day.

Normally after a day filled with seminars or other instruction, Kate would have wanted to keep herself moving. Perhaps go to a yoga class or for a quick jog. Maybe she would have gone shopping, even if it was just for some groceries. Anything to avoid sitting in her apartment all evening, but she'd already made plans with Lanie to do exactly that. Kind of.

Until she made the final decision about what she was going to do about the inheritance Kate had decided she wasn't going to tell any more people than necessary. Castle finding out was rather inevitable, but she wouldn't have told the boys if it had been up to her, and she had no plans to tell anyone else. After the decision was made, though, she knew it was only fair to let her good friend in on the pending changes in her life, so she'd called Lanie on Sunday night. Naturally, the ME had a very over the top reaction, though Kate was unsure what was more shocking to her: the inheritance or the marriage. It was probably a tossup.

Lanie had wanted to celebrate right away, but Kate knew she would be too busy. Ever insistent, her friend outright refused to not have some sort of bachelorette celebration, but the mere mention of the word made Kate shudder with horror. In Kate's mind, bachelorette nights that involved excessive drinking, male strippers, or other forms of debauchery were completely unnecessary. Kate didn't feel she was a stick-in-the-mud and she could more than handle her liquor—and nights on the town could certainly be fun. Her main issue with bachelorette (and bachelor) parties was that they were marketed as one last night of fun and celebration, thereby implying that there would not be fun nights during marriage. Kate knew that if she ever married, she would want to be with someone who she would want to spent time with and celebrate with at any time, thus the "one last night" party mentality would not apply to her. (Plus, while male strippers might have been amusing when she was nineteen and making her first trip to Las Vegas, getting a lap dance from a man she'd never met before did not sound all that appealing).

From the onset of their conversation on the subject, it was very clear that Lanie's opinion on bachelorette parties differed greatly from Kate's, so in the end they had to compromise. They agreed that Lanie would come over on Tuesday after work for a girls' night of celebrating in, and the craziest part of the evening might involve eating a second dessert—and not one that was plated up on someone's mostly naked body.

Though Kate made Lanie promise to keep it low-key, she remained concerned—and ready to bolt if Lanie showed up with a thong-wearing male companion in tow. She meant well, Kate knew that, but at the same time she could be way too overzealous. Under different circumstances Kate may have been up for something more adventurous like some bar hopping or maybe even dancing, but with the stress she was under on top of her exhausting day, eating an entire decadent dessert by herself was as over-the-top as she wanted to get.

Promptly at seven-thirty, Kate heard a knock at her apartment door and crossed into the hall to answer it. She had barely opened the door halfway when Lanie bounded through it squealing, "You're getting married!" and pulling her friend into a bone-crushing hug.

Kate half-laughed as she pulled out of the embrace, insisting, "I thought I told you this wasn't that big of a deal."

Lanie's eyes widened and she threw her hands out to the side. "Except this is a _huge_ deal! You're marring Richard Castle!"

Kate shrugged and shut the door behind her friend. "But it's not real. We're not going to, you know, be _married_-married."

"Except for the part where you will be married."

"Not in any traditional sense. We're not going to be in a romantic relationship."

"But you're still going to sleep with him, right?"

Kate's eyes bulged out of her head and she spluttered, "Wha—no. No! No!"

Lanie tilted her head to the side, a little bit patronizing. "Kate, c'mon."

"C'mon what."

She reached out and grabbed Kate's hand, giving it a little squeeze. "It's me; you can be honest with me."

"I am being honest. Castle and I agreed—nothing physical. Other than our wedding kiss—but that's just to keep up appearances."

Though that factor had been implied all along, she had confirmed it officially the day before when they'd met up at the courthouse to obtain their marriage license. As they left, he broached the subject of getting a room at The Plaza on Wednesday night so they could pretend it was their "honeymoon." Though her knee-jerk reaction was to refuse, she thought about it for a minute and begrudgingly realized he had a good point. If Michel Bernard's lawyers were to look into their relationship at all, spending the night apart after they got married would be a major red flag. They might be able to get away with her spending it at the loft before she officially moved in on Saturday, but Castle was right; a night in a hotel would paint a very convincing picture.

Ultimately, she agreed, but with the nervous addition of, "I know we kind of talked about this, but I just want to confirm again: we're not going to be having sex."

He'd gasped dramatically and pretended to be offended, but only for a minute. Then he smiled and said, "Of course; I'll book us a suite so I can sleep on the couch."

When they made their way into Kate's kitchen, and she took the wine bottle Lanie held so she could pour them both glasses, Lanie gave her friend an extremely skeptical look. "So…that's it? You guys aren't going to have sex for…how long is this again?"

"One year. Though, in all likelihood it'll be a year and a few months, since it would look extremely suspicious if we filed for divorce on our one-year anniversary or something." Strictly speaking, she and Castle hadn't talked about the dissolution of their marriage yet, but she had three-hundred-and-sixty-six days to broach the subject.

"So you're not going to have sex for a year."

Kate shrugged before sipping her wine. "Won't be the first time."

"And what about him?"

"He agreed to the same, though I told him it was okay if he, you know…" Her voice drifted off as the back of her neck prickled with discomfort. No matter how much Castle insisted he was fine with a year of celibacy, it would always be the part of their arrangement she felt the most guilt over.

"You told him what? That it was okay if he had an affair?"

Lanie appeared scandalized but Kate merely tapped her fingers against her wine glass. "But is it an affair if we don't have a real marriage?"

Huffing out a breath, Lanie leaned against the counter beside her friend. "You really think that you two won't end up hooking up? Really and truly?"

"Ah…doubtful," Kate said before turning away and pretending to take a long sip of her wine. In reality, she could not be truthful about that answer, because she had no idea what the next year would bring. She was neither one hundred percent opposed to nor one hundred percent committed to the idea of sleeping with Castle. They were going to be in each other's space far more than they ever had before and they already had a tendency to flirt with one another. If she was honest with herself, she would have admitted that the possibility of sleeping with him was a little bit exciting, but more than a little bit terrifying due to the possibility of it going catastrophically awry.

"Uh huh," Lanie continued. Judging by her tone, she didn't believe her friend one bit. Thankfully, she did not press on that subject any further. "Well, at least let me see your wedding dress."

Kate spun around and placed her wine on the counter. "I don't have a wedding dress. What kind of dessert did you bring, by the way? Can I see?"

Lanie put the brown paper bag she held onto the counter between them, but never turn her gaze away from her friend. "So what dress are you wearing, then. Can I see that?"

"I…don't. I mean, I'll be coming from the precinct, so I was just-"

"Stop." Lanie snatched the bag away from her once more and stared at her friend incredulously. "No. No way. I will not let you get married in one of your work suits. Real or not, this is your first marriage. You only get to be a first-time bride once."

Kate opened her mouth to disagree, but then she realized her friend was one hundred percent correct. Deciding to get married in one of her work suits was a time-cutting strategy she had thought of when thinking of how many emails she would have to answer before leaving for her post-lunch wedding, but really it was a mixture of practicality and apathy. True, she and Castle were not having a romantic-marriage, but she was bothering to get married to accept the inheritance. Castle had gone to the trouble of getting rings, booking the wedding itself, and a hotel room. The least she could do was make herself look nice.

"Fine; I see your point. I'm sure I have some dress that-"

"Nope—c'mon get your purse. Macy's is open until 10."

"But…" Kate glanced wistfully at the dessert bag and then back to her friend. "That just seems unnecessary because I'm sure I have something that-"

"Girl, stop." Lanie held up her hand and shook her head, clearly appalled. "What if _hypothetically_ lightening strikes and you and Castle end up staying married."

Laughing, Kate said, "Yeah right."

The ME's eyes narrowed. "A one percent chance—even you have to concede that's possible."

Kate shrugged. If you boiled down to those odds of possibility, nearly anything was possible, so she didn't even bother to argue against it. "One percent, sure."

"Okay, so let's live in that one percent and say…twenty years from now on your twentieth anniversary, your kids ask to see your wedding photo-"

"We're not getting photos done," she added quickly.

Lanie planted a fist at her hip. "Please. You know your dad will take at least one picture."

Kate grumbled as Lanie was correct. Castle's mother would probably take a few as well. She did not want to get a wedding dress. She did not want to make a deal out of something that was fake and would be un-done in a year, but at the same time, she knew what was in her closet and none of it came close to saying "bride." She was already going to all this trouble, the last thing she needed was to give anyone a reason to question the legitimacy of her marriage to Castle. At least…not any more than it would already be questioned.

"Ok fine we will go and look but I might not find anything."

Lanie made a dismissive hand-wave. "It's Macy's; you can always find something in Macy's."

"Okay but nothing too extravagant."

Lanie laughed loudly and shook her head. "Girl you are about to get twenty million dollars!"

"But not for me! I'm giving it all away!"

She arched an eyebrow. "Every single penny?"

"Well…no…" Kate hesitated. It had been her original intention to give away every cent, but her father assured her that was not only unnecessary but potentially foolish. She had a dangerous job and it was possible that something could happen to her and she would no longer be able to work. He recommended she keep at least one million dollars for herself, which naturally she balked at. He counter-argued by saying if she kept it but didn't use or need it, she could always give it away later on, which Kate had to concede was a valid point, but she still only decided to keep half the amount he suggested.

"Good, then you have plenty of room in your budget for a nice dress." With that, Lanie grabbed on to her friend's hand and practically dragged her out the door of her apartment.

* * *

Sitting at his desk that Tuesday evening, Castle skimmed his fingertips along the bottom of his chin as he stared at his laptop screen. He knew he was far too distracted to write anything substantial that night, but he had not yet decided what to do with his time, since he was feeling rather restless. He could watch a movie or find a strange documentary online to entertain him, but he wasn't sure he wanted to do that either since he wasn't sure he would be able to sit still, especially with his gut roiling with a variety of emotions.

He and Kate would be getting married the next day—not in any of the ways he'd dreamed about, but the fact of the matter remained. He was still confident he'd made the right decision on that front, but it was that point forward that made him uncertain. Kate would be moving into his place, putting most of her things in storage, and sub-letting her apartment. It was a lot of change for her, and a lot of exposure for someone who was usually so closed off. He was worried about her—that's what it came down to. He wanted this to be a step forward for them, not a spiral to her being as closed off as ever.

"Hey."

Castle's thoughts were interrupted by the voice of his daughter. He looked up to see her hovering in the doorway of his office and grinned immediately. "Hey, what are you up to?"

She shrugged and walked slowly into the room. "Nothing much. Just came to check on you. I feel like I should be taking you to for a drink or something."

He gave her a fatherly look. "You're not old enough to drink."

She smiled innocently. "I didn't say an alcoholic drink."

He hummed, pushed himself up out of his seat, and walked around so he could rest his rear against the front of his desk. "You wanna go out for a milkshake?"

"I just ate dinner"

"So?"

She shook her head and walked up to him asking much more seriously, "Dad…are you okay?"

"Of course, pumpkin."

"You're not sad?"

"Why would I be sad? I'm getting married tomorrow."

Alexis shook her head. "But it's not a wedding-wedding. Dad, I know you. If you and Beckett were getting married for real—for real, for real—you'd want a big wedding."

He hummed, considering this. "Actually, I don't really think Beckett is the big wedding type…" When his daughter's expression became more insistent, he rounded his shoulders and nodded. "Yes, okay, I see your point and I… I'm not sad, truly. I'm just a little concerned for Beckett since this will be such a big change for her."

"Is that all?" she asked, challenging. "How do you really feel about this?"

"I…I'm hopeful for the future. One never knows what might happen." He believed that statement was true about all facets of life, but particularly when it came to his marriage to his partner. As much as he wanted to dive right in on his woo-the-pants-off-her plan, he'd managed to talk himself out of it. She would need at least several weeks to adjust to their new living arrangement and then they'd need to find their footing and new rhythm as partners-all-the-time. Then he'd commence Operation Charm Beckett.

Alexis was quiet for a moment, but then she sat down in one of the chairs in front of his desk and smiled up at him. "You know, I don't really remember your wedding to Gina."

He almost laughed as he had not thought about that day in many years. "You were a little young."

She nodded. "I remember big in that big puffy dress and asking Gram when I could have cake."

He grinned. "That sounds about right. And that was a good cake."

Again, she was pensive for a minute before asking, "Are you sad your marriages haven't worked out?"

He smiled down at his child, endlessly proud that she was wise beyond her years. He slid over so that he sat directly in front of her and considered his answer carefully. "I…I don't think sad is the right word. Maybe slightly disappointed, but in myself. Especially with the second one, because I knew going in it wouldn't last."

"Then why'd you do it?"

He shrugged. No matter how many times he'd asked himself that question over the years, he never seemed to have a good answer for it. "Seemed like a good idea at the time. And I… I know I put on a good front and I'm quick to joke but I…I actually do like the idea of being married. Of having that one person in your life you can count on and turn to. I just need the right one." Those finer details of marriage were the ones he enjoyed most. Quiet talks in bed before going to sleep. Waking up beside the same person every day. Helping them out with little tasks like laundry or picking up a new bottle of lotion at the corner store because theirs had run out. The dependability. The consistency. The love. But it only worked when both people were committed. When both were all-in. When both loved as much as they could.

Smiling, Alexis stood and gave him a quick hug. With her hand still on his shoulder she said, "I really hope you get that, Dad; you deserve it."

"Thank you, Alexis."

She brushed a kiss against his cheek then bid him goodnight. Castle watched her go, then returned to the chair behind his desk to think about the following day—and the future to come.

* * *

**A/N thanks for reading everyone!**


	7. Chapter 7

**SEVEN**

Pacing a small side hallway at the court house, Castle shook out his hands as a means of directing away some of his anxiety. He shouldn't have been nervous or anxious; this was, after all, his third wedding. Yet, somehow, deep down he knew it would be the most significant. He knew that he was about to embark on the most important adventure of his life and he wanted to enjoy it—if only his heart rate would go back down to its normal speed!

That morning had been predictably hectic with Alexis having to get up and ready to go to school early so she could take an exam a grumpy teacher refused to postpone even after she told them she was missing school for her father's wedding. Castle had awoken early as well so that he could check in with Kate, who confirmed she did not have cold feet and would meet him at the courthouse by quarter after one. He'd also needed to shower, shave, change into his nicest suit that wasn't a tuxedo, and pack his bag for their honeymoon night stay at The Plaza.

Despite some rushing around, he had managed to make it to the courthouse in plenty of time. Actually, he'd beat everyone else there, which was surprising, but gave him a few minutes to shake off some of his extra energy.

"Oh, Richard!" Castle turned around when he heard his mother's voice. She approached wearing the floral dress he'd seen her leave the house in, but with the addition of a small bouquet of flowers that she had picked up on her way to get Alexis from school. The younger red-head trailed behind her grandmother now wearing a nice leaf-green dress that matched well with her skin-tone and hair color. "Darling, you look so handsome!" She greeted her son with a kiss on the cheek and he gave her a quick hug in response.

"Thank you, Mother. You look lovely as always, and you too, Alexis. You changed?" he asked, knowing she had left for school that morning wearing her regular uniform.

"Of course." She smiled at him. "If I'm going to miss school for this, I might as well do it right." She then took the flowers from her grandmother's hands and held them out to him asking, "You think Beckett will like these?"

As far as Castle was aware, the flowers would be the only surprise for Beckett that day. He'd kicked around doing a few more things that might be more his style, but then decided against it, knowing the wedding itself was already going to take his partner out of her comfort zone. Alexis had actually been the one to suggest a small bouquet as her gift to the happy couple, which of course Castle found both sweet and endearing. He didn't have the heart to tell her no, though he requested she keep it very small and simple, figuring that would be the best way to get Beckett to accept rather than reject the gesture.

"Yes, they're very nice, pumpkin; thank you for doing that."

Alexis smiled down at the flowers then gave a little shrug. "I just thought she should have them. She is a bride after all."

"Yes and-"

"Um, excuse me? Hello."

Castle's thought was lost when he gazed up to see Kate's father approaching. He'd only met the man that one time, but he was easy enough to recognize. Only in that exact moment did Castle realize that he was marrying this man's daughter without actually asking for permission, or, hell, even sharing a meal with the man. True, they weren't marrying in the traditional sense, but had there been more time, he would have at least wanted to have a conversation with Kate's father. He made himself a mental note to reach out and invite Jim to dinner the following week if his schedule allowed. Then, he stepped forward with his hand outstretched to shake.

"Jim—hello! Thanks for coming. Ah, Jim Beckett this is my mother, Martha, and my daughter, Alexis; this is Kate's father." He did the introductions and the trio exchanged handshake greetings.

"It's so nice to meet you—especially now that we're going to be family!" Martha said brightly.

"Ah yes I suppose we are. Is Katie here?"

"No, but she texted me when she left the Twelfth and, ah..." He paused to look at the time on his phone before slipping it back into his pocket. "Yep; she should be here any minute."

"I'll bet this isn't what you imagined when you thought of your daughter's wedding day," Martha said to Jim, nudging him with her elbow.

The elder man smiled and his eyebrows crinkled with a bit of joy that was accompanied with sadness. "Ah…no, not exactly. For many years now I've known her mother wouldn't be here, but if I'm being honest: I did not give it too much thought. I'm not sure how well you know my daughter, but she's never been one to adhere to any sort of norms. I'm proud of her for that, for staying true to herself. Given that, I was honestly never quite sure if she would ever…oh…" He exhaled a breath and turned towards the woman approaching them looking quite different than her normal self.

Martha saw her too and gasped out, "Oh Katherine!"

"Sorry I'm a little late…traffic…" She admitted with a slight cringe.

Castle, who had been once again checking the time on his phone, looked up and immediately felt the breath evaporate from his lungs. Rather than the business suit she had original said she would wear, or even a nice dress she might have pulled from the depths of her closet, she instead stood before him looking very much like a bride. She shed her usual detective-wear and instead wore a white, sleeveless, V-neck dress that fell just above her knee. The white silky base dress was topped with a sheath of beaded lace. She wore a pearl necklace with matching earrings, and had even curled her hair and pinned the right side of it back from her face with an ornate clip. She was gorgeous.

After gaping at her for twenty seconds, Castle stepped forward and reached out his hand for her saying, "Kate. You look beautiful."

She gave his hand a little squeeze then looked down at herself, a bit flustered. "Oh. Thank you. I wasn't sure if...but you look great. Really great. You all do." She let out a little laugh before looking at each of them in turn. She gave her father a quick hug and then took a step closer to the Castle women.

Alexis held out the bouquet saying, "Here; these are for you."

Kate looked a bit startled. "Oh, I…you didn't have to…"

"I wanted to. Can't have bride without a bouquet."

"And I have the rings," Castle added, patting his hand over his left breast pocket.

Kate turned to him and nodded. "Right. Okay. So this is happening."

He grinned at her. "Freaking out?"

"A little bit, yeah."

"You want to change your mind?"

She laughed nervously. "Ah…no. Yes. No. Do you?"

He shook his head. "Not at all. C'mon—it's almost time so let's go upstairs." He held out his arm and she slipped her hand into the crook of his elbow before walking along with him to the nearest elevator. Castle smiled to himself as he waited for the car to arrive, certain he would not get the image of Kate as a bride out of his head for a very long time.

* * *

"Beckett/Castle?"

Kate felt her stomach lurch when the courthouse clerk called out their names. She was not going to throw up; she was not going to throw up. This was all going to be fine. Perfectly fine. Her marriage was only temporary. One year of her life that would, in all likelihood, fly by.

"Ready?" She felt someone grip onto her hand and looked over to see her partner wearing an ear-to-ear grin. Her stomach lurched again. God, she was going to be someone's wife. She was going to be Castle's wife. For the next twelve months if anyone asked if she was married, she would have to say yes.

"Kate?"

"Ah, yeah." She hopped up out of her seat quickly when Castle gave her hand an insistent tug. Dipping her gaze slightly she added, "Sorry, I just had a, uh, moment."

"Everything's going to be fine; I promise," he said quietly. Then, he gave her hand another squeeze and led the way back to the hall to the room in which the ceremony would be taking place.

Kate greeted the judge with a handshake before standing beside Castle and then looking back to see that their families were lined up in the back of the small room to witness the ceremony. Again, her stomach felt unsettled so she placed her hand over it to give it a quick rub, not that it would do too much good, but at least it made her feel slightly better.

"Is this everyone?" the judge asked. When Castle confirmed, he nodded and said, "Now if you'll please face each other, we'll begin."

Kate moved so that she stood in front of Castle just off the judge's right arm. She gave him a small smile and straightened her back before clasping her hands together in front of her in preparation for the ceremony.

"Uh Kate?" Castle said, appearing more amused than anything. "We have to hold hands."

"Oh! Right! Sorry." She added a bit more quietly before reaching out her hands to hold onto her partner's. He gave her a little wink then turned his head to look at the judge; she mirrored his action and the judge nodded to each of them in turn.

"We are gathered here today to join Richard Edgar Castle and Katherine Houghton Beckett in matrimony. If anyone has any reason why these two should not be married, please speak now." He paused for barely more than three seconds before continuing. "Excellent. Do you have rings?"

"Yes, I have them." Castle dropped Kate's hands so that he could reach into his breast pocket and procure a black velvet ring box. He flipped open the lid to reveal both platinum bands tucked inside. He pulled out the smaller of the two, then awkwardly fumbled with the box for a moment before Jim, the closest family member to him, stepped up and held out his hand. Castle muttered a thank you as he passed over the box then held up Kate's wedding band to the judge as a signal that he was ready.

"Okay, Richard, place the ring on Katherine's left hand and repeat after me."

Kate felt her heart flutter when Castle smiled and reached for her left hand. He held it gingerly with his left and with his right, poised the ring at the very edge of her ring finger. She stared down at their joined hands, for once not only thankful that he had done this before, but that he was going first. She would have been a fumbling mess if their situation had been reversed. They hadn't had any sort of rehearsal like traditional weddings did. In hindsight, perhaps that was a mistake, but it was too late now.

"I, Richard Castle, take Katherine Beckett to be my lawfully wedded wife," the judge said to him.

Castle tightened his grip on Kate's hand and looked into her eyes as he repeated the words. "I, Richard Castle, take Katherine Beckett to be my lawfully wedded wife."

Again, Kate's heart fluttered, and she could feel her lips begin to curl into a smile.

"To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, in sickness or in health."

"To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, in sickness or in health." As he said the last word, Castle slid the ring all the way up her finger until it rested securely behind her knuckle.

Kate looked down at the ring and back up at Castle and felt her diaphragm flutter as a small chortle escaped. For just that one moment, she forgot their marriage was a business arrangement with no romantic inclinations. She forgot that they were in an office in the courthouse that could have used a fresh coat of paint and more than a few new flooring tiles. She forgot that their families stood just a few feet away and that she was wearing a dress she'd found on a sale rack at Macy's just a few days earlier. For just that one moment she gazed into the eyes of the man who was becoming her husband and felt the cool ring that now rested on her finger where it would remain for the next three-hundred-or-so days and it felt…_real_.

"Now Katherine."

She had been so entranced by the moment, that Kate felt a little startled when the judge spoke next. She gazed up at him a bit confused for a second before her father cleared his throat, calling her attention. She turned and saw that he held out the ring box. She gave him a gracious smile as she pulled Castle's ring from the box. Then, she mirrored the writer's earlier actions by taking his left hand with hers and holding the ring at the edge of his fingertip.

"Now, place the ring on Richard's left hand and repeat. I, Katherine Beckett, take Richard Castle to be my lawfully wedded husband."

"I, Katherine Beckett, take Richard Castle to be my lawfully wedded husband."

"To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, in sickness or in health from this day forward."

"To have and to hold, from this day forward, for worse or for worse—oh sorry, sorry!" she laughed when Castle's eyes widened. She could tell he was dying to make a joke, but thankfully he did not so that she was able to recover and continue with, "for better or for worse, in sickness or in health." With that, she slid the ring all the way onto his finger and gave him a nervous little smile. His hand closed around hers and he gave it a little squeeze. Instantly, she felt her heart lift and realized that getting married wasn't nearly as scary as she thought it would be. It was actually a little bit fun.

"Now," the judge continued, "by the power vested in me by the state of New York, I now pronounce you man and wife."

Castle stepped forward and Kate met him halfway, rising up onto her toes as their lips met. He pulled back quickly, but she found herself leaning in and giving him a second kiss as it felt the natural response. When she leaned back, his eyes were sparkling, and she let out a small giggle at the realization that the moment was not at all awkward, but actually very sweet. A second later she heard clapping and turned to see their family grinning at them. Embarrassment overtaking her, she turned her head and buried it in Castle's shoulder. She felt his arm slide around her waist and give her a reassuring squeeze. Kate had forgotten until that moment just how much she was not a fan of being the center of attention especially not in situations like that one.

"Oh, how lovely! Congratulations darlings!"

Kate stepped forward and gave her temporary mother-in-law a quick hug. "Thanks, Martha."

After their marriage certificate was signed, they were quickly ushered out of the room so the next couple could be wed. They walked almost the entire way back to the elevators before they found a quiet space to gather and re-group for the remainder of their day.

"Should we find a nice place outside to take some pictures?" Martha asked. "I know it's rather cold for you to be in sleeveless, darling, but I bet we can find a place for you to stand in the sun for just a few minutes."

"Oh…" Kate hesitated, glancing up at her new husband then back to Martha. "We…we don't really need to do that…"

"C'mon Kate—you gotta have something to send in to those lawyers to get that big fat check of yours."

Kate rolled her eyes at her partner. "I think the signed marriage certificate is sufficient."

"You have to at least humor your father for a few pictures," Jim said wisely.

Kate glanced at each of her family members in turn and realized she was in possession of the minority opinion, which meant she was about to lose. "Okay, fine…just a few."

As they walked towards the elevator, Castle stroked his hand down her spine and added, "C'mon Kate. Why wouldn't you want photographic evidence of this day, especially when you look this gorgeous."

She smiled softly at the compliment and said, "Ah, thanks. Lanie talked me into the dress."

"Ah. I'll have to remember to thank her the next time I see her. By the way before I forget, I made reservations for all of us to have an early dinner and then we'll head over to The Plaza after."

"Oh… about that." She turned to face him with a bit of hesitation. "They're…they're not going to make that suite all romantic, are they?" she had not even considered that possibility until that morning when she was packing her overnight bag, and then she immediately felt concerned for the potential awkwardness.

Castle shook his head. "I specifically asked them not to."

She nodded in appreciation. "Good. And we're just watching movies?"

"Whatever you want, Kate. It's your honeymoon."

"Technically I suppose it's ours," she corrected.

"True, but this marriage was for you, so I'll let you call the shots on this one."

She nudged his arm as they stepped into the waiting elevator car and said, "Thanks, Castle."

* * *

**A/N**: Thanks for reading everyone!

I do actually have a picture of Beckett's wedding dress, which I will post on my Tumblr & Twitter :)


	8. Chapter 8

**Eight**

Shortly after seven that evening, Kate walked into their junior sweet at The Plaza Hotel and took in the space. It was ornate and almost period-like when it came to the furnishings but that, she supposed, was just The Plaza's style. She wandered her way through the sitting area and glanced into the bedroom at the king-sized bed just to make sure no one had left any roses or champagne behind. They hadn't.

Moving back towards the entryway, she watched Castle tip the man who had carried up their bags and then join her in the room as he tucked his wallet away. "Oh, this is nice." He commented as he moved through the room and into the next, where he placed their bags at the foot of the bed.

"Have you ever stayed at The Plaza before?"

"Once, but just in a regular room. One of Black Pawn's writers had some big to-do wedding here and we stayed the night—that was back when I was married to Gina," he added for clarification.

"Ah, okay. I was here for some sort of brunch or something when I was pretty young, but I don't really remember it."

He hummed in acknowledgement of her response before walking into the bedroom area and shrugging off his blazer. He then began to look for the closet in which to hang it up, which he found while Kate hovered in the doorway of the bedroom, not entirely sure why she was watching him, but doing it all the same.

All in all, the afternoon and early evening had gone well. True, they took a few more pictures than she would have preferred, but she supposed that was okay. She only got annoyed when Castle scooped her up and insisted that they take a photo with him holding her in his arms like, well, a bride. It wasn't so much the pose (though that was certainly an unexpected move from him) but the fact that he hadn't warned her first and thus their family witnessed her squeal and thrash in protest until she realized what was going on.

After the photos, they'd parted briefly so they could go back to their respective apartments and get their bags. Then, they met for dinner, which she had to admit was utterly delicious, before departing with hugs all around and heading uptown to the hotel they'd spend their first night in as husband and wife. Though there had been some congratulatory comments as they checked in, Kate was grateful that there was nothing too over the top. That was the last thing she wanted especially with their marriage being…well, fake.

After he hung up his blazer, Castle walked over to his bag, lifted it up onto the bed, and unzipped it. Glancing back over his shoulder at her, he said, "You don't mind if I change before we start the movie, do you?"

She laughed, glanced down at herself, and back up at him, "Did you think I was going to watch it like this?"

He laughed and said, "No, I suppose that wouldn't be overly comfortable. I'll just be a few minutes."

When he disappeared into the bathroom, Kate wandered over to the sofa and sat down. She picked up the television remote, used it to turn the TV on, and began scrolling through the menu options. She had yet to pick out a movie to order when Castle returned wearing a black t-shirt and navy-blue athletic pants. She gave him a small smile, passed off the remote, and then went to retrieve her own bag.

Inside the bathroom, Kate found herself nearly startled by her reflection in the mirror. Of course, she had looked in one while she was changing and fixing her hair earlier that day, but she still looked far more bridal than she ever intended. That in of itself was surprising. As she stripped off her earrings and pulled the clip out of her hair, she thought briefly of Lanie and how pleased she would be when she saw the pictures of Kate wearing the dress she had insisted upon. She would really need to thank her friend for the suggestion the next time she had a chance; it really had been the right way to go.

As she finished changing into her NYPD sweatpants, Kate's eye caught sight of a card on the bathroom vanity listing the personal items that were available upon request. The top few items were the expected toothbrush, toothpaste, and shaving kit. It got slightly more interesting as it went on, all the way to the final item: condoms.

Kate felt herself grow unexpectedly uncomfortable at the word, for it symbolized the thing they were not going to be doing that night, which deviated greatly from typical honeymoon night behaviors. She put the card down and walked out of the bathroom, trying to forget about it, but then she decided that maybe it was best to take a leaf out of her partner's book and make a joke on the subject to break the ice and perhaps make them both feel better.

"So, uh," she began as she walked back out into the sitting area to find him seated on the couch staring up at the TV, "I was wondering…how many couples do you think don't have sex on their wedding night?"

He wrinkled his brow, obviously considering for a moment, but then concluded, "Probably more than you'd think. Meredith and I didn't."

"Really?" she asked with surprise before sitting down on the opposite end of the couch from him.

"No, we didn't…though to be fair that was mostly because she couldn't stop vomiting."

Kate cringed. "Oh no—did she get food poisoning?"

He gave her a wry smile. "Morning sickness."

"O-Oh," she responded, not having been fully aware that Meredith was already pregnant with Alexis when they married, though in hindsight it made a great deal of sense.

"And, you know, honestly," he continued, "the bigger the wedding and the bigger the production…you're utterly exhausted by the end of it. I'm sure some people that end up doing it are just soldiering through, too."

"Not a great way to start a marriage…"

He shrugged. "Eh…to each their own. As long as they're happy…"

"Fair enough," she nodded. Then, gesturing towards the TV she said, "So, um, you find anything interesting?"

He shook his head and handed the remote back to her. "No, not really. Go ahead and pick something."

After a few more minutes of searching, Kate selected a recently released action movie that she had a moderate amount of interest in, but mostly chose because she thought her partner would like it, and he did. They then took a short break for bathroom use and for Castle to get a water bottle from the mini bar before starting a second movie. That one was also released within the last year that she had wanted to see, but Josh had always vetoed it when she brought up the subject, so she never got around to it.

Ultimately, it seemed Josh's decision had been the right one, because the movie was terribly boring. Kate had been trying to watch the screen rather than her companion, but she did at one point hear him snuffle and looked over to see he'd fallen asleep. Not that she could blame him. She only continued to watch the movie because they had paid to rent it and she was hoping it would redeem itself in the end. Sadly, it did not.

With the second movie over, Kate reached out for the television remote, which rested on the coffee table in front of them. She ended up grabbing it poorly which lead to it slipping out of her hand and clattering against the edge of the table as it fell. The sound startled the writer awake and he gasped and grumbled. Kate apologized quickly.

"Sorry, I dropped the remote."

"'s fine," he mumbled through a yawn. "The movie over?"

"Yeah…it was really dull, sorry."

He shrugged with indifference then pulled his phone out of his pocket to see the time; it was after eleven-thirty. "You going to go to bed now?"

She nodded as she'd felt exhaustion pulling at her eyelids for the past hour—not that the movie helped any. "Yeah."

"Great I just need a few minutes in the bathroom. Then I'll grab a pillow and be out of your hair."

After he'd walked away, Kate gazed down at the couch on which she sat with slight discomfort. All things considered, it was quite small. She wasn't sure she could lay on it comfortably and she was several inches shorter than him. Her stomach clenched uncomfortably and she placed her hand atop her belly, giving it a rub. Castle was already sacrificing so much for her. He'd married her, disrupted his own life, and the life of his family, and given up a year of dating all for what? Very little, she believed. Given that, she felt she needed to do more for him, and, true, saving him one night on a hotel room couch was not even close to being equivalent compensation, but it was a start.

Kate stood and walked into the bedroom area, chewing on her bottom lip as she surveyed the mattress. It was a king-sized, which was practically wide enough for three people to sleep comfortably side-by-side. She and her girlfriends had done that several times when she was in college. If she was to share the bed with Castle, they probably wouldn't touch at all. They were both adults. They could absolutely handle sleeping in the same bed as part of their marital arrangement—especially since it was just this one time. It seemed only fair.

She leaned her shoulder against the doorframe for the next several minutes until Castle walked out of the bathroom and approached the bed. "You don't have to sleep on the couch."

He jumped, presumably because he had not realized she was hovering there. "Oh, um…" He hesitated as he looked from the bed to her then back to the bed. "It's…okay."

"No it's not; that couch is way too small."

"I'll be fine."

"No. Please." She stepped forward and held her hand out, gesturing towards the bed. "It's a king-sized bed. We're adults. It's fine. As long as you're okay with it, you can sleep in the bed with me."

He looked hesitant for another moment and then offered, "Do you want me to build a pillow divider wall down the middle?"

She laughed, "No," at first, but then considered it and teasingly narrowed her eyes at him. "It's not going to be necessary, is it?"

He held up his hands defensively and insisted, "Not at all, detective."

She walked towards her luggage and he asked, "Do you care what side you have?" and she told him she didn't before grabbing her toiletry bag and taking her turn in the bathroom.

She brushed her teeth and washed her face without incident, but as she was washing her hands after using the toilet, the sight of the simple wedding band on her finger struck her as slightly out of place. Normally, she did not sleep in any kind of jewelry, save for the few occasions she was too tired (or, frankly, too drunk) to remember to take out her earrings, but wedding bands were different. She didn't have to worry about it getting caught in the sheets or her hair, but did that mean she had to wear it all the time for the next year? She wasn't sure, but she also didn't need to decide in that moment. Since they were in a hotel room and she didn't want to lose it, she decided to leave the ring on.

After turning off all the lights, Kate returned to the bedroom to see that Castle had chosen the side of the bed closest to her. He lay on his back with his right hand up tucked behind his head and his left laying across his chest. She walked around the mattress and peeled back the covers on her side, and was just about to wish him a good night when he turned his head to the side and asked, "Where would you have wanted to go?"

"Excuse me?" she responded, not sure of the context of his question.

"I was just thinking…this is barely a honeymoon and certainly not one I would want if this was a real marriage. So, then I wondered about you. If this marriage was real, where would you have wanted to go."

"Oh." She laughed a little and said truthfully, "I have no idea"

He propped himself up on his side as he looked at her, clearly a bit surprised. "Really? You never thought about it?"

"No, I…" She sat down on the bed, tucked her legs under the covers, and thought for a moment about the last time she'd truly thought about her own wedding. It had been her last year of college. She had a roommate who she was friendly with, and that roommate was good friends with the girls across the hall, who were also seniors, so they would occasionally hang out. Over Christmas, one of those girls got engaged to her boyfriend, and they were planning to marry the August after graduation, thus wedding discussions had taken place. Kate had heard all about wedding dresses, veils, flower arrangements, and honeymoon destinations. As all the chatter went on around her, she did briefly think about her future nuptials, but then quickly shook off the notion. She had a plan that involved the police academy and becoming a detective as quickly as she possibly could; she would barely have time for a casual relationship let alone one that led to marriage. Interestingly, in the near decade since those original thoughts, her opinion hadn't changed much.

"I guess…I guess when I've heard people talk about honeymoons, there seems to be two main schools of thought: the single, all-inclusive destination where you just go and have crazy sex for a week, or the once-in-a-lifetime type trip where you try to experience new things and see all kinds of sights."

Castle nodded his head back and forth, considering her statement. "I guess that's one way to put it. Which camp are you in?"

"I'm not sure. I suppose both could be fun in their own right. I might…I don't know, depending on the circumstances I might lean more towards seeing and experiencing something new, but I…I guess I'll figure it out if I get there someday."

His brow raised and he looked amused. "Yeah? You gonna have a second marriage Beckett?"

She gave him a pointed look. "I'm going to get through year one of the first one and then I'll see."

"Fair enough. I'm going to turn out the light now."

"Okay." She moved to slide down into a laying down position, but before she could she said softly, "Castle? Because I can't say it enough: thank you."

He smiled at her. "Of course. Goodnight, Beckett." And with that, he turned off the light.

* * *

When Castle awoke the next morning, he stretched out his legs and groaned at the tightness in his lower back before opening his eyes. Instantly, all his "old man" aches and pains evaporated, because he found himself staring across the mattress at his lovely partner, who was now his wife. He tucked his hands beneath his cheek and stared over at her as she slept, curled up on her side with her left hand up by her face. God, she was adorable, particularly since that was the first morning they woke up together. The first of many, he hoped.

Quickly, he shut his eyes and sucked in a deep breath, reminding himself that he could not count his chickens before they hatched, so to speak. Yes, Kate had let him sleep in the bed with her but that had been an act of kindness not romanticism. They had not yet been married for twenty-four hours and he'd known from the start that his relationship with her was a marathon not a sprint. Slow and steady, even pacing—that's what she needed. That was how they'd get to the place he hoped they could get to.

Opening his eyes again, he smiled as he watched her eyelids flutter. Okay, so they were going to take things nice and slow. He was fine with that, but it didn't mean he could not have a little bit of fun with it in the meantime.

Castle only needed to wait about twelve more minutes for Kate to stir. She grumbled and stretched out her legs until her toes bumped against his shins. Her eyes popped open and she moved her legs back towards her side of the bed quickly, not that he minded. Instead, he offered her a quirky grin and said, "Good morning, Mrs. Castle."

"Oh god." She groaned loudly as she rolled onto her back and covered her face with both hands. She yawned, the scratched her head at her right temple before looking at him again and asking, "How long have you been waiting to say that?"

Castle resisted the urge to say, "Over three years," with all his might and instead said more casually, "Only about fifteen minutes. You sleep okay?"

"Kind of. What the hell was happening in the hall at, what was that? One-thirty?"

"Dunno; I didn't hear it."

She looked surprisingly annoyed for that hour of the morning. "You're one of those people who sleep like the dead aren't you?"

He chuckled and confessed, "A little bit yeah."

She grumbled something he couldn't hear but then sat up in bed and said with slight resignation. "Okay. I've got to get up or I'll be late for my shift."

He clicked his tongue impatiently. "I cannot believe you didn't take the day off—if for no other reason than to keep up appearances."

"I thought about it…but Kevin had already taken off today and tomorrow. Since we couldn't really control the date, we had to get married it just didn't work out."

He sighed and stretched his arms up above his head, pressing them against the headboard, which squeaked slightly at the resistance. "Fair enough I suppose. You're coming over for dinner though, right?"

"Actually, no. I have my entire apartment to pack and barely forty-eight hours to do it in," she told him in a tone that clearly indicated distress.

"Well then I can come to you. I'll bring takeout and we'll knock a bunch of it out tonight."

Uncertainty crossed into her face. "Oh…you don't have to…"

He frowned. "You make it sound like I only volunteered to help if I could rifle through your underwear drawer."

"Like that didn't cross your mind."

"It didn't! I'll have plenty of time to see your underwear while you're living with—hey!" he squawked when she slapped him in the face with her pillow. Laughing, he tossed the pillow towards the end of the bed and said, "C'mon Beckett. You know I'm more than capable of helping put all your books in boxes…or whatever else you want me to do."

She was silent for ten seconds, clearly considering, before she rounded her shoulders and nodded. "Yeah, okay. I would appreciate some help."

He smiled. "That's what husbands are for."

She rolled her eyes, slid out of bed, and walked towards the bathroom. He merely smiled as he watched her go. Their first day as husband and wife was already off to a good start.

* * *

**A/N:** Thank you all so much for all your reviews! :)


	9. Chapter 9

**Nine**

Sitting in his office that Friday night Castle rocked back in his chair, squeezed his stress ball shaped like Yoda's head, and tossed it casually between his hands. For the prior forty-five minutes he'd been writing and re-writing an interrogation scene featuring Nikki Heat and her latest suspect, but something just wasn't working with it. He knew that before he tried it from yet another angle and failed, he needed to step back, take a break, and do something else. Generally, that's when things began to click in his mind.

Closing his document for the time being, Castle dropped the stress ball onto his desk and then headed out to the main room of the apartment. He was sure there was something in the kitchen that needed cleaning or organizing. If all else failed, he knew he had a brownie mix in the pantry. He could work on that and make everyone a little bit happier.

He had taken only two steps out of his office when his eyes fell on the figure sitting at the kitchen table. She had his back to him and, if he wasn't mistaken, a great deal of paperwork around her. He wasn't sure if she had brought home casework or was working on something personal, but he didn't want to get too much into her space, just in case.

Ten days had passed since they officially became man and wife and, all things considered, they had gone as well as could be expected. After helping her pack up some of her belongings, Castle along with Esposito turned into a makeshift moving crew a few days later when they rented a truck to drive the bulk of her possessions across southern Manhattan. Of course, Kate helped as well, and they had her apartment emptied of personal belongings before noon. All that remained were her large furniture pieces, that would stay behind when she sub-let the apartment.

Kate spent most of that first weekend up in her room, unpacking and re-arranging what she could in the tight space. Though she did eat dinner with the whole family on Saturday night, Castle left her mostly to herself, knowing that she was adjusting, plus generally tired from all the moving. As much as it pained him, he also promised himself not to shadow her at the precinct, at least not for the first few days of the week. The last thing he wanted was for her to think she couldn't escape him at all and thus become frustrated.

As the week progressed and Kate remained in her room when she was at the apartment, Castle grew concerned. Even Alexis made a comment about the fact that she ate every meal separate from them and how worrisome that was. Knowing he did not want it to press on any longer, Castle went to the Twelfth on Thursday and specifically invited her to dine with them that evening. When she hesitated, he finally got her to open up about how she still felt concerned she was invading their space, which was why she'd been keeping to herself. Using Alexis's concern as the prime example Castle was able to convince her that she needed to embrace the loft as her home, and she agreed to try and become more comfortable there. Given that conversation had only taken place a day earlier, Castle was pleased to see Kate was already using the kitchen table for whatever it was she was working on, and hoped her progress continued.

Castle crossed the apartment and walked into the kitchen without saying anything so as not to interrupt his partner. He scanned over the counters but found them virtually spotless. Gazing into the refrigerator he found it atypically organized as well. He suspected his new roommate might have been responsible for that—not that he was complaining. It merely meant he would have to make brownies in an effort to clear his mind and try and make his scene work; he doubted anyone would be disappointed about that. There was never anything disappointing about brownies.

For the next few minutes Castle busied himself with pulling ingredients out of the cabinet and refrigerator and preheating the oven. He poured the mix into a large bowl, cracked an egg into it, and then carried the shell over to the trash before quickly washing the egg remnants off his hands. Back at the mixing bowl he poured in the oil and whisked it all together until it was smooth. Then, into the brownie pan it went, just in time for the oven to be preheated.

After putting the mixing bowl into the sink to soak, he wandered over to the edge of the kitchen to see if he could tell what Kate was working on. As luck would have it, at that exact moment she nudged a pen to the floor. He was all too happy to swoop in and pick it up for her saying, "By the way; I'm making brownies."

"Oh is that what you were doing?"

He hummed. "Yeah I'm struggling with a scene and sometimes cooking gets the juices flowing."

"I see."

"You working on a case?"

"No, I'm—oh I'm sorry. Do you need me to move some of this?" She quickly stood from her chair and began to gather up some of her piles of paperwork, but Castle stopped her with his hand on her shoulder.

"Kate it's fine. Remember what I said? This is our space for the next year. I was just trying to be friendly."

She gave him a nod and sat back down. "Well, its not a case. Actually, I'm starting to research different charities. There are so many, even just in this city. It's…entirely overwhelming."

"I'm sure." He gazed down at the papers and realized some of them were informational flyers and pamphlets, some displaying animals or children, and others just with the charity logo. "Do you have an area of focus?"

"Not exactly. I plan to diversify, spread the wealth—literally. But its…a lot more challenging than I anticipated."

"You don't have to decide any time soon," he reminded her.

She nodded. "I know that. I won't even have the money for another week or so and I never planned on giving it all away at once. I spent about an hour on the phone with those investors of yours today. Thanks, by the way, for the contacts."

He gave her a simple nod. "Of course." He was all too happy to help, not just as her partner and friend, but particularly after the amusing way she came to him and said she needed his help because he was the richest person she knew.

"They seemed pretty confident about growing the money. It'll take time, of course, but then I'll have even more than twenty million to give away."

He smiled. "That is the fun of investing."

She laughed lightly. "Right."

They were quiet for a few moments before he continued with, "Well, anyway, it's your money and I would never tell you how to spend or donate it, but if you ever need a second opinion or help with research, I'm available."

"Thanks Castle; I appreciate that. I think I'll feel better soon once I've narrowed my focus a bit or done a little more reading. Right now, I just feel… very overwhelmed."

Castle frowned slightly, hating that his partner felt that way without being able to help. He was so used to being the one that lightened her burdens he could not help but try and do that in this scenario, even though it was more of a personal dilemma than a work one. "May I make a suggestion?"

She looked up at him, her expression showing a bit of relief. "Please."

Castle pulled out one of the kitchen chairs and sat facing her with his hands resting against the table. "When you do get the money, pick a charity you're confident in—perhaps one you've given to in the past since you seem the sort of person who has probably done that—and just give them a hundred grand. That's admittedly a lot, but I think it might help you to sort of…dive off the deep end and take ownership of the money. After that you don't have to give any away for months, but just… think about it. That's what I'd do. After I bought another Ferrari," he added with a wink.

She arched her eyebrow. "Two Ferraris?"

"Maybe I should make the second one a Lamborghini…"

"You mean the second car you're not getting?"

He grinned. "Right."

She rolled her eyes, but then softened her expression. "Thanks Castle; I'll definitely consider it."

"Great." He moved to stand up from the table, but then paused asking, "I assume you want a brownie once they're out of the oven."

"Duh," came her response.

He chuckled, gave her forearm a squeeze, and then walked back to the kitchen to clean up the dishes, wait for the brownies to bake, and hopefully sort through his latest writing dilemma.

* * *

Stepping off the elevator on the penthouse floor, Kate felt a wave of exhaustion pour over her. So close—she was so close to being home, where she could take off her boots, change into yoga pants, and relax. She really wasn't sure what was making her so tired, as her day had not been particularly stressful—strange, but not stressful.

Stopping in front of the door to the Castle loft, Kate pulled out her key and smiled to herself, as she had, for the first time, though of this place as "home." A little more than two weeks had passed since she moved in and she could conclusively say her comfort progressed with each day. True, there were still some awkward moments, particularly if she was getting ready for work at the same time Alexis was getting ready for school. And she still felt strange intermingling her groceries with the rest of the Castle family's in the refrigerator (even if she acknowledged that was an odd thing to feel weird about). Still, each day was better than the last and she felt confident that after a few more weeks she would feel comfortable with the Castle loft as her temporary home.

After unlocking the door, Kate went through her usual routine of taking off her boots, removing her coat, hanging it in the closet, and then picking up her boots to carry up to her room. That day, however, when she turned around, Castle was only about a foot from her. She was so startled that not only did she let out a yelp, but she let go of the boots, which went clattering to the floor.

"Jeez! Castle!"

"Sorry Beckett. You okay? I said hi to you twice and you didn't say anything…"

"Oh. Sorry." She sighed and bent over to pick up her shoes. "I'm just…distracted. And tired. And I had a really weird subway ride home."

His brow rose with interest. "Oohh do tell."

"A guy got on the subway with a metal beam…like one of those that looks like a steel girder they put in high rises, only smaller, obviously. It was still really big though. He could barely get in the door with it and then he just stood there with it under his arm like it was a bag from Whole Foods. Everyone getting on and off had to try and get around his stupid beam."

Castle laughed. "Wow, that is weird—even for New York."

She laughed, too. "I know."

"Well…you have good timing, at least. Dinner should be ready in about ten minutes…"

She gave him the same pointed look she'd been giving him for over a week as she said, "You really don't have to include me in your dinners, you know?"

He shrugged as casually as ever. "But I want to. And why would we each make separate dinners when we're sharing the same kitchen? Doesn't make sense."

"Sure, I see that point—as long as you let me make dinner sometimes, too."

He smirked. "Sure thing. I have a whole drawer of take-out menus if you—hey!" he whined when she punched his arm.

"Not funny, Castle; I can cook."

"I wasn't arguing otherwise, I just—oh. Excuse me," he said when the sound of a timer could be heard going off in the kitchen.

When he dashed away, Kate returned to her original task of going upstairs, putting her boots away, and removing her dress pants so they didn't become too wrinkled. Once she had changed into one of her many pairs NYPD logo athletic pants, she returned to the kitchen, pleased to see both red-headed women were now waiting for dinner to begin.

Kate smiled to herself at the group. She really did admire how bonded the Castles were, particularly with her mother's absence weighing on her heavier than usual ever since the nineteen-point-seven million dollars had been deposited into her bank account. Sure, she and her father had become close, particularly after her mother's death, but they were never _this_ close. Though the notion of living with her father now that she was an adult was slightly distressing, she certainly appreciated the Castles' effort to stay close.

"Good evening, Katherine; how was your day?" Martha asked cheerfully when Kate approached the dinner table.

"Oh…okay. Fairly uneventful."

"Well sometimes those days are the best days, particularly in your line of work, I'd imagine."

Kate smiled at this and looked at each family member in turn. Thinking of her conversation with Castle just a few minutes earlier, she said, "Actually, since you're all here, I was thinking…maybe we could schedule a time when I could take all of you out for a nice dinner—my treat."

"What for?" Martha asked.

Kate shrugged. "Just as a thank you. I know the past few weeks have been an adjustment for all of us and you've all been so kind and welcoming, I just want to do something nice." Really, she could not have asked for any of them to have been sweeter. She truly wasn't sure if they were just naturally overly kind and considerate or if they were going over-the-top because she was a new addition to their lives. Regardless, it would have been a mistake not to show her gratitude.

Castle smiled as he approached the table with serving dishes of food. "That's very kind, Beckett, but you don't have to."

"I want to, really. I know this has been disruptive for everyone."

Alexis gave a little shrug and said, "It really hasn't been that bad. And, you know, you can keep more of your stuff in the bathroom."

Kate felt her cheeks heat under the young red-head's pointed stare for, at that moment in time, the only items of hers in the bathroom were her toothbrush, toothpaste, shampoo, conditioner, and body soap. Everything else she kept either on top of the dresser in her room, or in the make up case she carried in and out of the bathroom with her since she did not want to take up any extra counter or drawer space. "Oh, I…I mean, I didn't want to take up any room if you-"

"It's our bathroom," Alexis reminded her kindly. "Really, Kate; it's fine. It just gives me practice for when I'm in the dorms in a few years—especially since I'm a spoiled only child," she added, throwing a look her father's way.

He gasped and placed his hand in the center of his chest, feigning offense. "When have I ever spoiled?"

"Well you never got me that pony I wanted."

"See." Castle grinned.

Kate could not help but chuckle at the exchange. Then, after a moment, she continued, "But really—I would like to take you all out to show my appreciation."

Castle shrugged. "Well, if you want, Beckett. I'm sure we can find an evening next week. Now let's eat—I'm starving!"

She nodded in agreement then sat down at the kitchen table to eat dinner with her temporary family.


	10. Chapter 10

**Ten**

Kate Beckett strolled purposefully down the sidewalk and slipped her gloved hands into her coat pockets as she went. It was far too cold and blustery a day to have any part of her exposed—even the part wearing knit gloves. She was just about to duck her face down into the opening of her coat to shield her cheeks when she heard the slapping of feet against concrete from behind her along with a muffled curse. Turning back, she watched as her partner-slash-husband seemed to be recovering from a fall, but clearly trying to act as though nothing had happened.

"You okay there, Castle?"

He met her eye and his cheeks turned slightly pink. "Sorry, I just…tripped."

She gave him a half amused, half confused look, wondering how he had tripped along empty sidewalk, but then shrugged and continued walking towards the latest crime scene to fall within her jurisdiction. It had been over a week since she'd received a call alerting them to a new homicide victim, which was great news for the city, but the detective inside of her had certainly been itching for a new case to solve.

Their latest victim had been discovered in the alley between two apartment buildings when the janitorial staff was leaving in the early morning hours. Kate had just been getting ready for work when she received the call and agreed to meet her team at the scene. As she descended the stairs, she found Castle waiting with a travel mug of coffee in hand and as he passed it off to her, he asked if she had any open cases. She laughed, told him she just got one, and that if he could grab his coat and shoes quickly, he could join her. He had then practically run to his bedroom. Now, they were ready to start their day together—if Kate could only find the right alley.

Upon arriving at the address dispatch provided for her, Kate felt immediately confused, for there was no police activity. She gazed down the closet alley and realized the issue. Apparently, dispatch had sent her to the wrong end of the alley; she could see the ME's tent clearly at the opposite cross street. She sighed to herself, debating whether or not to return to her car and drive around the block due to the chilly temperatures, but then decided it wasn't worth it, and ushered for her partner to follow her towards the body.

"Oh! Look who it is! I haven't seen you in a while, Detective."

Kate was greeted by a rare smile from Perlmutter, who usually preferred the day shift while her friend Lanie worked the night. "Good morning, Perlmutter. How are you?"

"Well, actually I'm—oh god. You brought him?" Perlmutter threw his hands up in a mixture of frustration and disgust.

Confused, Kate turned to see that Castle had stepped up beside her, his pleasant smile dropping away at Perlmutter's negative reaction. "So…no good morning, then?" he muttered to Kate.

She cringed briefly and then walked over to where the ME stood beside the body. She could tell at once the victim was a female, perhaps in her early- or mid-twenties. She wore black pants and a heavy winter coat, which didn't reveal much about her. The visual stab wound on her neck, however, was a pretty big indicator of how she died. "So what-"

"Let me just ask you." Perlmutter cut off Kate's inquiry with unexpected volume and she jumped slightly. "Why him? Why'd you have to marry him?"

As the ME glared in Castle's direction, Kate glanced up at him with slight sympathy. Perlmutter had shown animosity towards the writer over the years, but Kate always thought it was mostly in jest—like a game he liked to play since he didn't believe a mystery writer should be allowed at crime scenes. His tone how, however, made it sound like Kate had married Hitler's protégé, which seemed uncalled for. Confused and stunned, she stammered, "I, um, I…"

"I just can't believe you married him!" Perlmutter proclaimed, shaking his head and then turning back to the body.

Kate huffed out a breath. Quite frankly, some days neither did she, but it was the situation that baffled her not the writer himself. Honestly, he had been nothing but welcoming and kind since their nuptials. Truly, she could not have asked for better. She was still considering defending her partner to the sullen ME when he stepped up beside them and said, "Ohh what do we have here? A dead woman?"

"Obviously." Perlmutter snipped. "She was found just like this by building maintenance staff. No ID in her pockets. She's still wearing a watch and earrings, though both look costume so robbery was probably not the motive here. Your partners are searching the streets for signs of a discarded purse, just in case."

"COD that wound on her neck?" Kate asked.

"Most likely, but I won't know for sure until I get her back to the lab."

"Of course. Well, keep us updated." After thanking him, Kate walked towards the nearby street in search of Ryan and Esposito. She found them halfway down the block and greeted them pleasantly. The duo grinned a bit too enthusiastically towards her and her companion.

"Look at you two showing up to crime scenes together."

Kate eyed Esposito's cheeky grin with suspicion. "You say that like we've never done that before." Which, of course, they had; numerous times.

"Not since you've been married," Ryan added pointedly.

Kate merely shrugged as she didn't really see the significance of his observation, particularly since their marriage remained as much of a ruse as ever. Thumbing towards her companion, she explained simply, "He had chapters due."

"Yes, and now they're complete," Castle chimed in, "so I can get back to my diligent research. Or, as I like to think of it, helping you guys out."

Kate didn't even need to turn around to see the absurd smile on her partner's face; she could hear it in his tone. Plus, it was evident by Esposito's snippy retort.

"Yeah right."

"Please. There's no need to lie—it's just the four of us here. You know as well as I do that my help is essential to your success."

Groaning at his ridiculous peacocking, Kate smacked Castle's arm with the back of her hand and said, "Castle. C'mon. Focus on the case or soon your head won't be small enough to fit inside my car again."

He chuckled lightly. "Sorry, detective. I promise I'm now completely focused on this case."

"I'm sure," she muttered, mostly to herself, and then she turned back to the task at hand: identifying their latest victim and bringing her killer to justice.

* * *

Sitting at his desk that evening, Castle absentmindedly drummed his fingertips against his keys. He wasn't actually typing anything, but his hands were hovering in the correct position, waiting for that bolt of inspiration to strike. Considering he had been sitting that way for nearly twenty minutes and he'd yet to get a plausible way to get Nikki and Rook where he wanted them to be, he decided to take a short break.

Leaning back in his cushy desk chair, he swiveled it around to face the other direction, hoping a literal change of scenery might help him. As he did so, he caught sight of something through the shelves of his bookcase walls. A small figure was visible on the window seat just on the other side of his office walls. From her tight, huddled form, he suspected she sat with her feet on the bench, knees tucked in to her chest. He didn't need to wonder which of the women in his household it was, but he felt his heart clench in sympathy.

For the prior two days, he helped Kate work her latest case: the death of a woman in the alley beside an apartment building. Naturally, their first thought was that the woman lived in that building, but they soon discovered all residents were accounted for. As they searched street cameras for her whereabouts or her potential attacker, they had a stroke of luck, for they believed they caught her on camera in front of a nearby ATM. From that, they were able to identify her as Ophelia Hernandez, a twenty-four-year-old pre-school teacher, who lived with a roommate who happened to be on vacation that week, which was why she had not been reported missing.

As their investigation progressed, they discovered that Ophelia had a boyfriend, or, at least, someone who very much looked like a boyfriend based on her social media posts. When they tried to track the gentleman down, thinking he could be a person if interest if not an outright suspect, they began to hit their first set of roadblocks. They discovered the boyfriend was Chase Drummond, a twenty-eight-year-old working on Wall Street. This in of itself would not have been significant, were it not for the fact that Chase's father, Peter, was actually a state senator.

They had barely peeked into Chase's history when they were unceremoniously shut down. As it turned out, the Drummonds were very wealthy and had plenty of connections, including with the mayor. Thanks to Beckett's never-back-down persona, she was able to bring Chase in for an interview. Castle had watched from behind the glass, and it took him all of two seconds to dub the smug boy as guilty. Chase all but confessed before his lawyer shut him up and dragged him out of interrogation as he wore a gut-churning smirk. A few hours later, the news came down from the DA: Chase would be charged with only the minor crime of improper disposal of a body and his sentence would be a measly few hours of community service.

Castle had watched as Beckett, clearly more determined and frustrated than ever, continue to search through security camera footage, especially since she now knew the face she sought. It didn't take her long to find him, either. Chase, attempting to hide his face with the hood of a jacket, walked away from the alley well within their COD window. Though the video was not the highest quality, there was a wet sheen to right sleeve of his black coat that one could only assume was blood. Despite this seemingly damning evidence, Montgomery refused to allow Kate to investigate any further; their case was closed.

Though he attempted to talk to his partner-slash-wife at that moment, she gave him a look that indicated he should back off, so he did. He returned home, made dinner for himself and Alexis, and patiently waited for her to walk into the apartment, but she had not by the time he cleaned up the kitchen. Fearing he might inadvertently ambush her, he'd retired to his office, where he'd been for nearly an hour and a half, which meant she'd arrived home in that time period and was clearly some combination of distraught, frustrated, and furious.

Castle was not entirely sure that she had enough time to herself to process, yet he could not stop himself from being involved at that point. If she wasn't living with him, he would have been forced to wait until the next day, by which point he knew she would have beat herself up quite thoroughly. Since she was so accessible, however, he could not help himself from being involved. It's what he did—particularly when people he cared about were hurting.

He pushed himself away from his desk and walked out of the office into the main room. He walked towards the kitchen and then turned back, pretending as though he had just noticed Kate sitting by the window since he did not want to be too obvious about his silent observation. He walked over to her slowly with his hands in his pockets, stopped a few feet away, and gazed at her, waiting for her to look his way. When she didn't after a minute, he said quietly, "You did everything you could."

Only at the sound of his voice did she turn to face him. "What?"

"You did everything you could on this case." He repeated. When her brow rose indicating curiosity, he added with a little shrug, "I could feel your disappointment from my office."

She huffed out a breath and untucked her legs so she could climb off the window seat. When she did this, he could see she carried a now-empty glass in her hand which led him to assume her post-work beverage of choice had been an alcoholic, not that he could blame her.

"It's not right," she muttered as she walked past him on the way to the kitchen.

"No," he agreed as he followed her, "it's not. It's terrible. For Ophelia. For her family. It's not right at all. But you can't control everything."

She put the glass down on the kitchen counter then turned to face him, throwing her hands out to the sides, "I know but if I just-"

"No buts Kate." He took a step closer and gently shook his head. "We had evidence. That security camera footage would have opened the door to a warrant, and you know that guy wasn't smart enough to wash his jacket and his clothes. There would have been enough evidence to take this to trial, and you probably would have won if it had, but unfortunately that's not how it's going to work out this time and you can't change that, no matter how much you may want to. I know its hard to let go. I'm frustrated too. Seriously—I'm so mad I voted for that guy," he said in reference to the state senator, father of their possible killer.

"Yeah…" she sighed out, dropping her gaze to the ground.

Still wanting to cheer her up, Castle stepped forward and opened his arms. "Hey, c'mere." Without waiting for her to respond, he wrapped his arms around her shoulders and pulled her tightly against his chest.

She remained rather statuesque and asked, "What are you doing?"

"Distracting you. And telling you it's okay." He held her tight for another few seconds before her felt her lift her arms and rest her hands against his back. Grinning at the victory, he gave her a little bit tighter of a squeeze and let her hold on as long as she needed to.

After thirty seconds she said softly, "I know it's out of my control but I just…"

"I know. That's what makes you you."

She slid back from the embrace and offered him the smallest of smiles. "Thanks, Castle."

He back at her. "Anytime. You want to watch something dumb on tv? I have hundreds of movies…"

"Oh no, you don't have to…"

He almost laughed, for she made the idea of hanging out with her sound like a chore he would suffer through, but the exact opposite was true; he enjoyed every moment they spent together both in and out of the apartment. "I don't mind. Or we could do something else? Scrabble?"

She gave him a side-eye as she walked over to the counter to grab a bag of pretzels sealed with a clip and siting by the toaster. "I know better than to play Scrabble with you when I'm this distracted."

He hummed with amusement and leaned his back against the counter as he watched her open the pretzel bag. "That's true, I will decimate you, but I promise to be nice about it."

"Yeah right."

"How about just a few hands of poker…get your mind off things. Friendly—no betting."

She hesitated for a moment, but then ultimately agreed. After grabbing a handful of pretzels from the bag, she followed him to the main sitting area where he produced a deck of playing cards from the drawer in the coffee table. They sat oppositely as he pulled the cards from the box and began to shuffle. "So, what would you normally do on an evening such as this? To get out your frustration, I mean."

"Ah…" She hesitated and skimmed her teeth over her bottom lip before answering. "Probably not something very healthy. I'd have a drink or two, go over everything in my mind again, see if I could have done something better. Something different."

He shook his head as he began to deal out the cards. "You're too hard on yourself. I know, I know. It's rough," he added at her pointed look. "I've been in that place too, which is why its nice to have an outlet. A distraction."

She picked up the pile of cards he'd slid her way and mumbled, "Oh you're a distraction all right…"

He laughed slightly. "Not me, necessarily, though of course I am more than happy to provide my services whenever they are needed…"

Kate shuffled the cards around in her hands for a few moments before putting down two and receiving two more from the deck. "You know it… it can be really hard for me to talk to someone else about what's going on. I always assume no one can understand, because they haven't had my experiences. They haven't seen what I've seen. I think…I think in the past that's been true in some cases and perhaps in others I wasn't giving the other person enough credit. Maybe I…" She cut her voice off then quickly shook her head and continued again a moment later. "Well, the point is: I know that's not the case with you. I know you understand, because we've been through a lot of things together and I…"

That time, her voice drifted off as their eyes met. Castle felt the back of his neck prickle with heat and for a moment—for one, incredible moment—he thought something might be about to happen between them. That maybe she would confess how she really felt, or how their partnership wasn't just work-centric or platonic. For six thrilling seconds he thought that moment might be their chance, but then she cleared her throat and dropped her gaze; he resisted the urge to curse.

"I, um…are you going to draw any cards?" she asked a second later.

"Oh, um. Yeah. Sorry." He quickly dropped three cards to the table and picked up three more, which he began to rearrange inside his hand.

"No problem. I'm a little thrown off too since we're not betting."

"Right." He smiled softly, then leaned in a bit closer to her adding, "And thanks for saying that about me. I feel the same about you."

Her expression brightened and she said, "You know, um, I'd like to do something for you. I realized I never offered and that…that wasn't very nice of me."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you married me so I could get the inheritance and I'm living here with you… the least I can do is donate some money to a charity of your choice."

"Oh, you don't have to," he assured her, for he had not married her looking for something in return; the thought had never even crossed his mind.

"Please. I want to," she continued, and then offered him a hundred thousand dollars to donate as he pleased.

He shook his head in protestation. "That's far too much. I don't even know if I need half that amount."

She pursed her lips. "Castle, I have almost eighteen million dollars of my inheritance left and it's growing nicely thanks to your finance guy. Take the hundred grand."

He smiled at her. "Well, if you insist. I…I like charities that encourage literacy in schools, especially ones that don't have strong reading programs—or good reading test scores. There are two I regularly donate to. I can get you the names and you can split the money between them."

She nodded. "Consider it done."

"Thanks Beckett."

"No thank you," she countered. Then, gesturing with her handful of cards, she said, "You ready to do this?"

"Ready." He echoed. They revealed their hands, which was not all that exciting, because he had literally nothing, and she had a pair of threes, which meant she won by default. They both chuckled and he asked, "Another hand?"

"Sure. I'll deal if you want."

He placed the deck of cards in her hands and then teased her with, "You better be ready this time, Beckett; that was my practice hand."

She merely rolled her eyes and said, "I'm sure."


	11. Chapter 11

**Eleven**

With her elbow against her desk and her fist against her face propping up her cheek, Kate Beckett let out a pathetic sigh and tapped the space bar on her computer keyboard to pause the video that was playing. Her eyes felt as though they could no longer process one more millisecond of video footage. She definitely needed a break—and some coffee.

For Kate, reviewing security camera footage was never any fun, especially when they were forced to look through a broad range of time, like the two-day window of this case. Worse yet, she wasn't looking at regular traffic or security camera footage. No, she had the displeasure of looking through interstate toll booth footage, which somehow seemed even duller than the rest. On top of all that, she wasn't even working on one of her active cases; she was helping out a fellow detective with whom she had previously called in a favor. This, it seemed, was the method by which he asked for payback, which she supposed in the grand scheme of things was not that bad, but that didn't make it less boring.

On her way back to her desk, Kate was intercepted by Captain Montgomery, who waved her into his office. She quickly placed her mug of coffee down by her keyboard and then walked into his office asking, "Is there something I can do for you, sir?"

"Actually yes; I'm hoping you can help me out. Tomorrow night there is a charity even favored by the commissioner. My wife and I have tickets to attend, but I just found out that my sister-in-law needs to have emergency gallbladder surgery."

"Oh. I'm sorry to hear that; I hope she's okay."

The elder man nodded. "Sounds like she will be, but my wife wants to be with her, obviously and… well I was hoping you could take our place. You're not on shift tomorrow are you?"

"No, but…" She thought about her schedule for the following day, a Thursday. As it was her day off, she had a routine dentist appointment scheduled in the morning, but to the best of her knowledge she had no other plans, which was good, since she would need to go through her still-packed belongings to see what sort of dress clothes she had that would be event appropriate. It was a little bit short notice—not that Montgomery could help that, as it sounded—but she could make it work. "I, um, yes I can go, but I guess it's okay if I go alone. It's pretty short notice for anything else."

Montgomery arched an eyebrow at her. "Really? Does your husband have other plans?"

"I…" Kate hedged. Damn, she had completely forgot about her husband—er, Castle; she had forgotten about Castle. She didn't recall him mentioning anything, but they generally were not in each other's lives to that level of detail. It was entirely possible he had something planned for the next night, and if he did, even if it was something casual, she wasn't sure about her comfort level of asking him to cancel. As it happened, she would have felt the same even if they were in a real relationship, because she didn't mind going to events alone.

"Well, uh, truthfully sir I'm not sure what his schedule is like for tomorrow evening."

Looking rather confused, Montgomery clasped his hands in front of him and asked, "You wouldn't bring another date, would you? Not when your _married_?"

"Well no, not a _date_, but I…well, no I guess not." She concluded, knowing that her cheek were turning pink. Damn, he had really gotten her that time, hadn't he?

Ever since learning that of her impending marriage, Montgomery had treated Kate with a certain amount of suspicion and intrigue. She knew he did not buy her cover story that she and Castle had simply decided to marry one day—as well he shouldn't have. He'd known her for many years and thus probably assumed that she would have never eloped under normal circumstances—and that assumption was correct.

When Castle became wise to Montgomery's suspicion, he'd tried to diffuse the situation by joking, "Don't worry; she's not pregnant!" Kate had nearly shot him for that comment. Worse: it only succeeded in making Montgomery more suspicious. Though he never outright asked, she knew full well he thought the situation was very fishy, and since that was entirely true, Kate could not say much to the contrary, so she chose to say nothing at all. Thus, Montgomery liked to tease her about her husband at every given opportunity and there wasn't very much she could do about it. At least, not without telling him the truth, which she was not prepared to do.

With a cheeky grin Montgomery said, "Something tells me Castle will make himself available if you ask him."

Kate forced a smile and said. "Sure. Probably. I'll, um…you'll send me the details?"

"Ah!" Montgomery held up a finger indicating she should hold on, then walked around behind his desk. From the shelf there he pulled a white envelope, which he passed over to her. "These are the tickets and all the other information I have."

"Great. Thanks."

"No, thank you, Beckett; I really appreciate you stepping up. Have a nice time."

"Ah yeah…" She sighed a she took the envelope and held it close to her chest. "Thanks…" Then, she walked back to her desk shaking her head slightly, silently hoping that Castle didn't have plans so she wouldn't be put in a position of having to ask him to break them.

* * *

Standing at the kitchen island, Castle trapped his tongue between his teeth as he eyed his pancake creation on the griddle. He squinted at it, tilted his head, and then added one more squirt of pancake batter from the squeeze bottle in his hand. Thirty seconds later, he swapped the bottle for a spatula, held his breath, and flipped over his creation.

"Ohh…" He groaned when the Minions face he was trying to make looked more blob-like than anything else. And he'd watched that YouTube video at least half a dozen times too! "Oh well," he sighed aloud and let the pancake finish cooking for a minute before dumping it onto the plate with his other failure. On the bright side "failing" at making the face still made a pretty tasty pancake that went right along with his breakfast-for-dinner theme that evening.

Just as he was about to start attempt number four, the apartment door opened and he glanced up to see Beckett walking inside. "Oh hey." He quickly turned off the griddle and reached for a towel to wipe his hands on. "How was your day?"

"Um…okay. I actually had something I wanted to talk to you about."

"Oh?" the writer asked, intrigued.

Kate walked into the kitchen and went straight for the cabinet with the wine goblets. Once she pulled a bottle out of the wine refrigerator, she began her story. "So first let me apologize for the short notice, but I literally just found out this afternoon. Montgomery…well, he kind of roped me into this thing tomorrow night."

"Thing?"

"Mmhm," she hummed as she poured the wine. "It's a charity dinner—something the commissioner is involved in. Montgomery and his wife were scheduled to attend, but his wife's sister needs surgery so now they can't go. He asked me to go in his place and…and to bring my husband."

Though she mumbled the last few words, Castle still heard them and they brought a smile to his face. Here, he had hoped to use that evening to invite her on their first husband-wife outing, and now she had beat him to it! Just as well, too, since they had been married nearly seven weeks and had yet to make a "public" appearance. "Tomorrow night?"

"Yeah, you don't have plans, do you?"

"Not at all."

Notable relief crossed her face and she smiled. "Great! I mean, thank you for agreeing to be my date."

"Well I wouldn't want to disappoint the commissioner." He winked at her then walked over to take the wine bottle and pour himself a glass. "Although, while we're on the subject… I actually was actually going to bring up something similar. An invitation came in today for an event I'd like to take my wife to."

She arched her eyebrow skeptically. "It's not tomorrow night is it."

He chuckled. "No, no; it's in two weeks."

"What is it?"

"It's a movie premier. One of Patterson's books has been adapted and you know how he likes to rub that in…"

She eyed him suspiciously. "You say that like you won't when the Nikki Heat movie comes out."

"Of course, I will! Anyway, ah, I'd like you to be my date."

"Sure Castle. Seems only fair."

When he picked up some uncertainty in her tone, he asked, "Are you sure that's okay? I don't want to twist your arm into it…"

"No, no it's fine. Just…what does one wear to a movie premier?"

He shrugged. "Oh, anything nice, really. Some women show up in jeans and a nice top."

"I'm not wearing jeans."

"A dress then. But its not black tie or anything."

She smiled at him. "Well then, I look forward to it."

"Me too," he echoed.

She smiled and sipped her wine, gazing casually around the kitchen until her eyes fell on the island. Her brow wrinkled slightly as she approached his pancake station and she gazed at the plate of mutilated faces with equal parts amusement and horror. "What's…what's going on here?"

"Oh…well I was trying to create pancake art, but it's much harder than it looks!"

She arched an eyebrow at him and teased, "You don't say."

"I watched a bunch of instructional videos and then went out to buy this squeeze bottle but…I don't know. Maybe it doesn't have a fine enough tip. The faces just aren't coming out right."

She half-laughed. "I can see that. Perhaps you should try something a bit simpler first? To get the hang of it?"

He grumbled as he walked back over to the griddle. "I watched like four different videos and this did seem like the easiest."

She patted his arm a bit patronizingly and then walked over to sit at the island counter.

"You wanna try one, Beckett?" he asked as he turned the griddle back on.

"Oh no, definitely not, but I'm happy to watch you try again…and again…"

He smiled at her and said, "Your husband appreciates your support." In response, she merely rolled her eyes.

* * *

**A/N**: thanks for all your reviews! really appreciate them :)


	12. Chapter 12

**Twelve**

Standing by the elevator bank at Mount Sinai hospital, Kate sighed as she scrolled through the email inbox on her phone. There were simply too many messages for her to address using such a small screen and keyboard. Luckily, she was on her way back to the Twelfth where she could take half an hour to try and make some progress, but she doubted she had very much time until the ME's report on the prior evening's victim would be ready. That was what she really needed to kick the investigation into high gear, but, per usual, Lanie's department was just as busy as ever.

Shifting her weight between her feet, Kate slipped her phone into her back pocket and continued to wait patiently for her partner. They had arrived at the hospital forty minutes earlier to talk to Rebecca White, the across-the-hall neighbor and listed emergency contact of their victim, Maisie Oberlin. The night before, Maisie had been found hanged from the fire escape of her apartment building. Upon arriving at the scene, Kate immediately felt it looked suspicious and possibly staged; her partners agreed. She waited around for the medical examiner team to take down the body and then saw a variety of wounds on Maisie's hands and forearms that seemed more consistent with a struggle than a suicide thus fueling the possibility of foul play.

That morning when Castle joined the investigation, they began trying to recreate Maisie's final days in hopes of getting closer to proving or disproving suicide based on behavior actions. It was then that they discovered her friend and neighbor, Rebecca, had been admitted to the hospital the night before due to an unknown injury. Naturally, the duo went to interview her under the guise of gathering information about Maisie so they could close their case, but in reality they were both suspicious from the first words out of Rebecca's mouth. Now, it seemed, they had two women to investigate.

"Kate?"

As she had been deep in thought, Kate startled at the sound of her name. She whipped around to see who was speaking to her and faltered at the sight of her ex-boyfriend, Dr. Josh Davidson. "I…oh—Josh. Hi—hi." She stammered stupidly out of pure shock. The last she had heard, Josh was in Haiti doing work for the Doctors Without Boarders program. His decision to go was actually one of the main reasons they broke up for Kate did not think she could be in a long-term relationship with someone who would be gone for half a year, particularly when their relationship was not idyllic to begin with. In truth, she felt absolutely nothing when he told her he'd been accepted into the program, which caused her to realize she did not care that he left and thus would not really miss him when he wasn't with her. Still, she knew he was a good person and a good doctor, so she was pleased to hear he would be doing such noble work abroad.

"I, um, I thought you'd still be in Haiti," she added after recovering from her shock.

He briefly shook his head and tucked the clipboard he carried under his left arm. "Halfway through the program I get a two-week break, so I'm here catching up on some personal things and picking up a few shifts here and there."

"Oh, wow. That's great. That work must be very fulfilling."

"It is. Are you here on official business?" Josh asked, nodding to the badge clipped to the waistband of her pants.

She nodded. "Interviewing a person of interest, yes."

Josh nodded, and then they stared at each other in silence for a few seconds before he added quickly, "Well I don't want to keep you…"

"Oh, that's okay. I'm glad you said hello." She dipped her head, a little embarrassed when thinking of her initial reaction to seeing him. She dipped her chin, which resulted in a chunk of hair falling over her face, so she reached up and brushed it away with her left hand. "Actually, it was nice to-"

"Is that…" Josh cut her off, staring at her hand with unexpected intensity. Gazing back up at her face he asked, "Are you wearing a wedding ring?"

"Wha—oh!" Kate glanced down at her hand and was almost startled to see the platinum band there. _Shit_ she thought immediately, now realizing what she'd done with her left hand. She never even though-! Wearing the ring was such commonplace now, she almost always forgot about it. The first few weeks had been hard—the metallic band had been annoying to adjust to since she rarely wore rings and it always seemed to be in her way. She'd thought more than a few times about putting it away in a jewelry box, but every time she promised herself that would be the night, she caught sight of Castle wearing his and convinced herself she could tough it out for a few more days. Eventually, she ended up forgetting about it and thus the ring became a regular part of her life…until she ran into her ex-boyfriend!

_Shit_.

"I, um…yes. Yes, I did get married." She fought a cringe as she confirmed.

Josh appeared utterly baffled and she could not blame him one bit. Evidently still struggling from the shock, he repeated, "You got married…When?"

She swallowed hard. "Um, it's been about-"

"Phew!" Kate was interrupted by her partner, approaching from the side, wiping his still damp hands across the sides of his jeans. "Sorry. I promise that's the last time I order a second grande…oh." He stopped short, presumably upon noticing who Kate was speaking to. Turning to Josh he added a pleasant, "Hello."

Josh's eyes searched their faces for ten seconds before his wide-eyed gaze landed on Kate and he asked, "You…you married him?"

"Yes," she said softly.

His brow line now nearly even with his hairline, Josh took a step back from the couple. "Wow. Um, I um… I guess congratulations are in order."

"That's really not necessary," Kate said quickly.

Josh gave her a polite smile. "No, it is. I'm glad you're happy, Kate."

She forced pleasantness across her face, though in reality she felt like the gum stuck on a New York City sidewalk. "It was nice to see you Josh. Good luck with everything in Haiti."

"Y-yeah," he said in a way that made it seem as though he'd forgotten that country existed. Then, after a moment he added, "Good luck on your case."

With that, they parted ways, with Josh walking down a different hallway and Kate walking over to the elevator button and stabbing the down arrow repeatedly.

Kate did not speak for the duration of the time it took for them to return to her car, which was parked down the block from the hospital. To his credit, Castle followed along silently until they reached the car, at which point he hesitated with his hand above the handle. "Do you want me to go?" he asked as he met her eye over the roof of the car.

"What?"

"I can go…I don't have to go back to the Twelfth with you…"

"What…why would you go?"

"Because…you want some alone time?"

She sighed and rested her hands on the car door. His offer was sweet, but unnecessary. It wasn't him she was upset with, but herself. Kind of. Unfortunately, as Castle's inquiry had reminded her, she didn't have time for personal issues; they had a case to solve. "No it's—I'm fine."

Once they were seated in the vehicle, Castle twisted his torso so that he faced her and he stared her down, pointing out. "You're not. You're upset, and that's okay. That is: it's okay if you regret marrying me."

"What—no. I don't; I don't." She repeated the sentence twice for emphasis. Truly, she had never once though the word "regret" in combination with thoughts of her marriage to Castle. What was there to regret? She received an almost twenty-million-dollar inheritance which she was slowly donating to various charities in the New York area. She was able to keep her same job and her same life for the most part. True, her apartment was sub-let meaning she was stuck living with the Castles for at least eleven-and-a-half more months, but, honestly, it wasn't that bad. She'd grown accustomed to being around Castle, Alexis, and even Martha on a regular basis.

She didn't regret marrying Castle. She stood by that decision in order to get the money she felt confident would help many people, but that did not mean she was not allowed to feel sad or frustrated about those on the outside; those she inadvertently hurt along the way. Particularly when she came face to face with their shocked and saddened expressions.

"I just… it's… there are very few people who know our marriage is just an arrangement. And that's fine. It's how it has to be, but…from an outside perspective, I married you barely five weeks after I ended things with Josh and objectively that's rather…terrible."

He shook his head. "I think that's too harsh. I mean, I see your point. Five weeks would be a quick amount of time to jump into any relationship again let alone a marriage, but…people fall in love—you can't control when or how." He let a beat go by before almost frantically adding, "Please—I mean—I don't—I'm not saying I'm in love with you. I'm saying from an outside perspective…"

She waved away his comments, for she understood his example and did not interpret as him professing his love for her. "I get what you're trying to say, but it's not like we just met and had this whirlwind romance it…" She huffed out a breath and rested both hands against the steering wheel to try and collect her thoughts. Turning back to him, she continued, "I don't care what people think of me, not in this case. I didn't kill anyone or cheat on anyone. If they think I was impulsive and dove into something that won't work out…fair enough. Maybe they'll even be smug about it when we divorce. I don't care about any of that. But…Josh seemed hurt and I never wanted that. He's not involved in this situation at all and he shouldn't be affected by it yet…"

Castle reached over and put his hand gently on her shoulder. "You're a good person, Kate. You worry about hurting others and that's admirable, but you can't protect everyone from getting hurt in every circumstance; it's just not possible. Running into Josh like that…it was just chance. Besides, he was okay with your breakup, right?"

"It was fairly mutual." She nodded. She had been the one that brought it up first, but he didn't fight her. His response was a mostly-neutral, "If that's how you feel…" type of comment.

"See. You're making a bigger deal out of this as it is. It singed his ego, sure, but he's not devastated. Is there anyone else you'd feel upset about finding out?"

She thought for a moment then shook her head. "I don't think so… how about you?"

"No."

Thinking about his version of what she had just experienced, she asked, "What about Gina?"

"What about her?"

"Well you were in a relationship with her around the same time I was with Josh. What did she say when you told her about us?"

"She…" He paused for a moment then shook his head. "Nothing, really. She said congratulations. I think it was only half-sarcastic."

Kate arched a skeptical eyebrow at him and he shrugged, quirking his lips to the side and adding, "She's my ex-wife; what do you expect?"

She considered this for a moment, then told him, "You can tell her the truth if you want. If you think that would make things better."

"Kate, I've had two failed relationships with her, my quasi-boss…I think our relationship is pretty much set in stone at this point," he told her very seriously.

She gave him a half smile. "Still… if you want to tell her, it's okay with me."

"Thank you. And don't worry about Josh. He's a reasonably handsome doctor who rides a motorcycle…he'll land on his feet, I'm sure."

Kate moved to start the car, then paused when Castle's statement fully registered in his mind. Turning back to him she asked, "You remembered that Josh had a motorcycle?"

"I…" He hesitated for three seconds before continuing with "'m a writer. I remember all sorts of details."

She knew instantly his tone was suspicious, but didn't have the mental capacity to contest his statement, so she merely shrugged, turned on the car, and then checked the mirrors before pulling out into traffic.

* * *

"…Anyway, I think these last three chapters look good, Rick; very promising."

Castle smiled down at his phone, which was sitting atop his desk on speaker-mode while he spoke with his editor-slash-ex. "Thank you. Any notes?"

"A few. They'll be in your inbox tomorrow morning."

"Sounds good."

"Anything else we need to discuss?"

Castle's heart skipped a beat at the part of the conversation he could not exactly say he was looking forward to, but after giving it two days of thought, he ultimately decided full-disclosure was the right path to take. "Ah… one small thing. It's about my marriage."

He heard Gina grumble and they huff out, "Jesus, don't tell me you're getting a divorce already. Has it even been three months?"

"No, we're not getting divorced. We're… What I wanted to tell you is that the marriage is fake; a ruse."

She was silent for nearly a full ten seconds before she said slowly, "I… don't understand."

Castle skimmed his fingertips over the stubble on his jaw and leaned a bit closer to the phone as he spoke. "It's a long story. Kate had a long-lost relative who died, and she had to be married in order to accept the inheritance."

"It was sizable I assume?"

Not wanting to give away too much, he merely said, "Several million."

"Damn," Gina muttered.

"Yeah… So anyway it…it came up recently that while we're keeping that fact mostly to ourselves, some people might be… well it might be better off if we tell a select group of people, so I wanted to let you know. I'd appreciate if you didn't tell anyone else."

She was silent for several seconds before saying, "Well, your secret is safe with me, but you know as well as I do that your marriage might be a ruse, but it's not fake. Goodnight, Rick."

"Goodnight, Gina." He echoed before tapping the button on his phone to end the call and leaning back in his chair once more.

Sitting there, Rick thought back to two days earlier when he was in the car with Kate before they left the hospital. She had asked him what Gina's reaction was when he told her that he would be marrying Kate. He told Kate her reaction was a half-sarcastic congratulations, but that wasn't the truth. In actuality, Gina had smiled at him and said, "I guess the third time really is the charm, huh Rick?"

Under normal circumstances, Castle hated lying, especially to his partner. Yet, at the same time, revealing Gina's truthful answer not only could have brought about an awkward moment for the two of them, but it would have re-directed the conversation away from Kate's struggle to the topic of "them" which Castle knew wasn't fair. That was why he'd made a joke. And, of course, he also knew that Kate was not yet ready to talk about "them"—particularly not immediately after running into Josh.

The trickiest part about Gina's actual reaction to the marriage was that Castle hoped beyond hope that she was correct and his third marriage would be the one that stuck. Though he supposed he could be intuitive, he did not think Gina was being particularly observant in that moment. In fact, he'd figured she'd react with a joke or some comment referencing the obvious feelings he had for his muse. Kate had, after all, been one of the main reasons his most recent relationship with Gina ended. Ironically, she was also the reason it started. If Kate had only agreed to come with him to the Hamptons the summer before… Well, that was water under the bridge. They were in a completely different place now; things were different. Things would be different, he only needed to be patient.


	13. Chapter 13

**Thirteen**

With a whistle on his lips, Castle walked into his apartment building that evening in an even more pleasant mood than usual. He had a very good day and expected to have an even better evening, and what could be wrong with that?

With temperatures rising to the mid-70's, the day had been unseasonably warm, which lead Castle to conclude he just had to leave his apartment for lunch. He was feeling a bit stuck on his latest chapter, which was a secondary excuse for getting out of the house. He walked to one of his favorite bistros, sat at the window as he ate, and then decided to keep walking uptown to see what he could see—and in the hopes of inspiration striking.

During his nearly four-hour jaunt around the city, Castle didn't find too much inspiration, but he did buy a new pair of shoes and a scarf he thought his mother would like, so the afternoon had been successful, just not in the way he'd originally intended. Since his trek had taken him further away from the apartment than he intended, Castle opted to take a subway back so he was not late for his evening plans. That plan had partially backfired when something went wrong with the line and they were stuck not moving for over fourteen minutes, but just when he was really beginning to worry the train began to travel south again. As a result, he made it back to the apartment just a few minutes later than he intended, but nothing too catastrophic.

Walking directly into his bedroom, the writer placed his purchases down in front of his dresser drawer; he would deal with them in the morning. He walked straight in to the bathroom and cranked in the shower. He lathered efficiently and shaved as quickly as he could without causing multiple cuts on his skin. Once in front of the mirror, he blow-dried his hair, put on some after-shave lotion, and considered himself ready—well, except for his clothes. He couldn't go out on his third official husband-and-wife date naked, now could he?

After changing his mind on what shirt, he was going to wear twice, Castle walked into the entryway of the apartment fully dressed and ready to go. He'd half expected Kate to be waiting there for him, tapping her foot impatiently, but he didn't see her, which was fine; they still had enough time. He walked into the kitchen meaning to get himself a drink of water when he heard a muffled curse coming from the direction of the laundry room. Just as he was about to investigate, Kate rushed out looking rather frazzled, carrying an armload of wash. He stood in place watching her, trying to figure out what was going on, but inadvertently startled her with his presence. She jumped and then quickly apologized.

"Sorry! God, sorry. Look you're all ready to go and I—I'm sorry."

"Kate, it's fine," he said calmly. "is something wrong? Can I help?"

"No, no," she said, though her tone was a bit pitiful. "Just…at work today, I spilled something on my good white blouse. I wanted to wash it right away when I got home and I thought…you know, why wash it alone. I thought I had time but I misjudged how long the load would take and now we're going to be late!"

Castle glanced down at his watch and then shook his head. "We have almost two hours until the movie."

"But we said we'd eat before!"

He waved his hand flippantly. "So we'll get something quick instead of having a sit-down; I don't mind. Seriously, it's fine."

She bit down on her bottom lip and nodded reluctantly. "Okay. I won't be too much longer—I promise." She hurried towards the stairs and whipped around the corner with such force that a stray piece of laundry dropped out of the bundle. Castle saw it and instinctively went to pick it up.

"Oh, Kate, here. You dropped…oh…" Castle's voice drifted off when he realized he now held a pair of her purple panties in his right hand. Her eyes went wide when she saw it, but with her arms preoccupied, there wasn't much she could do except for to back down two stairs and gesture towards him with the pile. He tucked the panties on top and wisely decided that saying nothing about the incident would be the best course of action.

"Ten minutes at most!" She promised before hurrying up the stairs.

"Sure, sure…" Again, he waived his hand dismissively. Then, once he was sure she was out of out of visual range, he turned and shook his hand out quickly as though it had accidentally touched a flame. Of course he wasn't upset or disgusted by touching Kate's clean underwear. Quite the opposite, in fact. Holding Kate's panties however briefly simply reminded him that they were going out on a date tonight and considering how well the first two went, he had high hopes for their evening at the movies, even if they would have to have a shorter dinner than previously planned. True, their "dates" were all part of their marriage contract, but Castle also believed that the more dates they had, the closer they would bond, and the easier it would be for Kate to…well, get to a place where she was okay with him touching her underwear.

The first date they had a few weeks earlier was best categorized as being a bit odd. It certainly wasn't awkward, merely strange, but that was mostly due to the situation they had been put in—forced to be last-minute fill-ins for Montgomery and his wife. Neither of them knew anything about the event before arriving and while they tried to make the best of it, it quickly became clear that the event was not something either of them would have chosen to attend voluntarily. Fortunately, their second date, during which they attended the movie premiere of a film based on one of James Patterson's novels, went much better. In fact, Castle could confidently say that they both had a lot of fun.

The prior week Kate had come to him with a playful expression asking if he wanted to go to another movie with her. He'd initially been very excited, thinking she was just asking because she wanted to hang out with him, but then she explained the real reason behind her invitation.

Apparently, during her research for charities and organizations to donate to, she discovered that an art house theater she'd favored during her teenage years was nearly going out of business due to lack of funds. Since she had many fond memories of being there, she was all too happy to donate. As it turned out, her funds were the exact amount the theater needed to turn themselves around, and they decided to have a Grand Re-Opening in celebration—and in the hopes of drawing more patrons. Because of her generous support, Kate was invited to be the guest of honor. When he heard the story behind her invite, he never even once felt disappointed; he was all too happy to go with her and celebrate.

Knowing they would now be running a bit behind schedule, Castle used his time in the kitchen to search for the theater location on his phone and then look for eateries nearby or at least on their way there that would provide quick bites instead of a sit-down meal. By the time Kate came down the stairs eight minutes later, he'd come up with a few ideas. Walking towards the sound of her feet slapping against the bottom step, Castle began, "So actually I—whoa." He cut off his own thoughts with a gasp when he looked up from his phone and saw her looking sexy as hell. She wore skinny jeans and a black t-shirt with a long necklace that hung down between her breasts. She'd used an extra dark eyeliner and shadow to give her face an edgy look that went well with the wild curls in her hair. "You look—I mean—great. Wow."

She smiled softly at his stammers. "Thanks Castle. Ready to go?"

"Absolutely." He waited while she grabbed a leather jacket from the hall closet and then they headed towards the elevators together. "While you were upstairs, I found a few places for us to eat—they're all close to the theater so we don't have to worry about being late."

"Oh." She smiled pleasantly at him and then gave him a nod. "Thanks Castle; that was very thoughtful. I really am sorry about being late."

"Don't even worry about it, Beckett. I'm not in the least. We'll go to that new French place some other time."

"Okay."

"Great. So, are you excited to be the guest of honor tonight?"

Kate turned away from him, embarrassment obviously creeping into her expression. "Stop. I'm not the guest of honor."

Fully amused by her embarrassment, he continued with, "I'm pretty sure that invitation literally said that you were."

"I know but…" She groaned and shook he head as she looked back at him. "That's not the point of all this. I didn't take that money to gain any sort of notoriety or accolades for my donations. I just want to help. Maybe…maybe I should start donating anonymously."

Castle thought about that statement as they walked through the lobby of his building. While he could understand what she was saying and would certainly respect the decision if she made it, he wasn't convinced it was the right call. "You could if that's what you really wanted, but is there something so wrong about being recognized for your contribution? I'm not saying you should expect a parade and excessive fanfare, but your donation is literally what pushed this business from going under to being able to sustain themselves for another half year according to their letter. Is it really so wrong of them to want to thank you?"

"No…I suppose not. But I reserve to right to change my answer depending on how intricate this "guest of honor" thing gets tonight."

He chuckled. "Fair enough."

As the theater wasn't that far from where they lived, they agreed to walk, and headed westward down Broome Street together. After walking seven blocks, Castle had them walk south for two, then one more west until they arrived at the Italian sandwich place he found using Google. Inside, they found it was truly one of those classic New York Hole-In-The-Wall delis, since Castle doubted more than five adults could stand side-by-side without bumping into the walls of the store. The line for food wasn't long, but the two interior tables were already taken, so the married duo took their sandwiches to go and walked another block and a half until they found an open bench on the outskirts of Spring Street Park.

They didn't speak much as they ate, they merely watched the busy rush-hour traffic and took in the nearly constant sounds of car horns honking. When she was nearly done with her sandwich, Kate commented, "This was really good; I'll have to remember that place."

"Absolutely." Castle agreed. "They will be receiving a five-star Google review from me."

Kate glanced over at him, amused. "Do you really leave Google reviews?"

"Why wouldn't I?"

She shrugged. "I don't know…I guess I shouldn't be surprised, though. You will do anything to avoid doing the writing you get paid to do."

"Hey!" he responded in a tone that feigned offense. "I just happen to enjoy sharing my knowledge and experiences with the citizens of the world. Is that so wrong?"

"No. It's actually kind of cute. Here," she said, holding out her hand and indicating she would take his empty sandwich wrapper. He passed it over and watched her walk towards the nearby trashcan as a smile spread across his face.

Kate Beckett had called him cute!

When she returned to their bench, he stood and walked beside her to the nearest street corner, where they waited for the light to change before crossing and making their way back uptown towards the theater. As they seemed to have a bad stretch of luck, every light they came to was red, which caused Kate to mutter that they might end up being later after all. Hearing this, Castle walked more quickly across the next block, but they still didn't make it in time. The next block, however, they arrived just as the light began to turn. Kate began to slow down, obviously intending to stop and wait, but Castle chose the opposite. He reached for her hand and took off in a jog, half dragging her with him as they crossed the street just in front of a car turning right—and they received a long, loud honk in response.

"Castle!" Kate scolded when they hopped up on to the sidewalk on the other side of the street.

"What?" He grinned down at her innocently. "We made it across didn't we."

"Yes, but I would preferably like to make it to the theater tonight with all my leg bones intact."

"Psst!" He made a dismissive hissing sound. "That guy wasn't even close to us. C'mon, Kate. As a life-long New Yorker aren't you used to only using the signs at crosswalks as rough guidelines?"

She gave him a pointed look. "Both my parents were lawyers, so, no, that wasn't encouraged."

"Well you gotta learn to live sometime, Beckett," he teased as they continued to walk down the street. They made it about halfway down the block before Castle realized he had never let go of her hand and, more importantly, she had yet to let go of his. He immediately had an internal debate with himself over whether or not he should break hand-contact or let it go. Ultimately, he decided to gamble on the latter option and see how long it would take before she said anything about their new form of contact.

* * *

At the next street crossing, Kate glanced up to doublecheck what street they were on and estimated they had only three blocks north and one east before they reached the theater, which meant they would make it on time after all. As they crossed, Kate once again chastised herself for her error in judgment. She was so rarely late that it bothered her, but she supposed the evening was working out just fine after all.

When they reached the other side of the street and found themselves in the oncoming pathway of a woman pushing a stroller, Kate moved to her right to get around the woman while Castle moved to his left, leaving them awkwardly tethered by their joined hands. Kate quickly shook off Castle's grip and they separated in time for the woman and her child to pass by. Once they were walking side by side again, Castle turned to her and muttered a quiet apology. She shrugged it off; there was no need for him to be sorry about holding her hand. Actually, it had been kind of nice.

Within ten minutes they had reached their destination, which was just as Kate remembered it, except the marquee seemed to have been painted and there were balloons on either side of the entrance. Otherwise, it appeared just as weathered and unique as the first day she visited, nearly half her life earlier. She stopped walking in the middle of the sidewalk and took in the faded movie posters and stickers tacked to the entrance wall of the theater, reliving the fond memories from her rebellious teen years for just a few moments.

Castle waited patiently by her side, saying nothing until she turned to him and gave him a nod. "This place looks pretty neat," he commented.

"Wait until you see the inside."

She walked up to the ticket booth and gave her name as instructed. The man working the booth requested ID, which she provided, and then he smiled and welcomed her and her guest. Kate took their tickets and walked inside the old theater. Just inside the door they were greeted by the manager, who thanked her graciously. He ushered them towards the concession stand and told her that her selections would be free. Then, after thanking her one more time, they parted ways.

As they had just eaten, Kate wasn't overly hungry, but chose a bag of M&Ms at the concession stand in case she got hungry mid-movie. Meanwhile, her companion chose a large popcorn for himself and then they made their way into the theater itself which had him proclaiming, "Whoa look at this place! I can't believe I've never been here before."

"It's a hidden gem, for sure."

Smiling at her he said, "I'm glad you chose this theater to support."

"Me too. Here okay?" she asked, gesturing towards to aisle seats near the mid-point of the theater. Despite it being less than ten minutes until the movie started, the seating area was pretty vacant. They could have had their choice of any number of seats, but Kate wasn't too picky when it came to movies.

Castle agreed and they sat down before he asked, "So when did you first come here? When you were sixteen, right?"

"Yes."

He tossed a handful of popcorn into his mouth and studied her face for a moment before asking, "So…what was sixteen year old Kate Beckett like?"

She dusted her fingers over her forehead and shrugged, saying, "Oh, I don't know."

He nudged her with his elbow. "Yeah c'mon. I have to know all about the girl who's against walking across sidewalks from the moment the 'do not walk' signal starts flashing."

She gave him a snarky look but then shrugged and said, "I don't know…classic teenager, I suppose. I hadn't quite hit my rebel phase yet but-"

"Rebel phase? You?" he asked with slight disbelieving.

"Oh yeah." She laughed. "Grunge rocker boyfriends, black lipstick, fake leather clothing… ditching school to go to poetry slams. I did all of that, but that was more when I was seventeen. At sixteen I was just starting to test the waters after living as the daughter of lawyers for most of my life."

He hummed and then said, "Do you think we would have been friends? Meaning: would sixteen-year-old almost-rebel Beckett have liked me?"

She raised an eyebrow. "I don't know, Castle. I think at sixteen I might have been a little leery of a forty-some-year-old man trying to be friends with me."

He clicked his tongue with annoyance. "Not the me now—the me back then!"

"Back then…" She let her voice drift off as she did the mental math. "You would have been in your mid-twenties and the father of an infant…so again, probably not."

"I… fair enough." He agreed finally. "Probably not a fair comparison with our age differences back then. And if I told you what I was like at sixteen, you'd probably still say no. You might not believe this but: I was a lot to handle back then."

"You say that like you still aren't."

They shared a laugh and he finally relented. "Okay, so we wouldn't have been friends back then—I get it."

She reached over and squeezed his arm. "We might have been friends, Castle; you never know, but we're friends now, and that's what's most important, right?"

"Definitely," he agreed. He tossed another handful of popcorn in his mouth and asked, "So…did I ever ask you what movie they were showing? I don't remember you telling me…"

"I didn't, because I wasn't sure if you'd be a fan. It's…it's actually probably a bit cheesy—a horror movie from the sixties. I don't think I've ever seen it, but…" She scrunched her nose as she confessed, "I kind of love that genre, even if its utterly ridiculous."

His smile grew wider—if that was even possible. "I love cheesy horror movies, too."

"You do!?"

"Yeah! Where do you think some of my inspiration comes from!" He told her excitedly.

She laughed and snagged a handful of popcorn from his bucket, saying, "Well, then; I guess you'll probably enjoy this movie after all."

* * *

**A/n:** First, thank you all for reading!

second, i wasn't going to say anything until closer to the end but i see some speculation in the comments I need to clarify. This fic will be my last Castle fanfic; however rest assured this fic will be finished! It is already fully written so it will just continue to be posted biweekly.

My decision to stop writing is a combination of the fact that I've been struggling to write for the last year anyway and that combined with the negativity and backlash I've been facing have really just zapped my motivation down to zero

I do want to say that I absolutely appreciate each and every one of your follows/reviews over the years more than I can ever say. So thank you all for your kindness and support

and dont forget there are still 7 more chapters of this story :)


	14. Chapter 14

**Fourteen**

Castle stood at the end of his kitchen counter sorting through the pile of mail that had accumulated over the prior week when he heard the apartment door open and close. He briefly glanced back over his shoulder to see Beckett walking inside and threw her a casual, "Hey," before turning back to the mail pile. As it was nearly eight o'clock, she was arriving home far later than she should have given that she had a regular seven-to-five shift that day. When she missed dinner, he didn't think much of it, figuring she merely became caught up with paperwork, or perhaps there had been a delay on the subway line. The later it became, he did wonder what she was up to since she had not messaged him, which she had been doing as of late, but that didn't matter now that she was home.

Placing the final two letters on the "important" pile in lieu of the "junk" one, Castle spun around and gave his wife a smile. "How was your day?"

She responded in a clipped tone without looking at him as she unzipped her boots. "Fine."

"Do you need a drink? Some wine perhaps?"

"I'm fine." She repeated, still not looking at him.

"I made stuffed chicken breasts and veggies for dinner and there are leftovers in the fridge."

Kate walked past him without really looking at him, though she did say, "Okay."

Frowning slightly because he could easily tell something was bothering her, Castle added, "Or if you'd rather, there is still some pasta from two nights ago in a container on the bottom shelf. You could-"

"Castle, stop!" She snipped at him before pulling a can of diet soda out from the refrigerator door. "I said I'm fine."

At her downright unpleasant tone, Castle's entire face crinkled with displeasure. Kate hadn't yelled at him in quite some time and to the best of his knowledge he hadn't done anything wrong, so clearly something else was going on with her. "What's wrong?" he began innocently. "Did something-"

"What's wrong," she cut him off viciously, "is that I don't need this—you. Hovering." She stabbed a finger in his direction and he actually leaned away from her with shock. "You're always here, hovering, trying to do things for me when I'm perfectly fine. I don't need you to do anything. I don't want you to. I'm fine, Castle; leave me alone."

With that, she stalked past him and up the stairs without ever looking back.

Feeling more than a little shell-shocked, Castle stood frozen for several moments, his eyes trained on the stairs as though he expected Kate to pop out from behind the wall and declare that her attitude had been and ill-conceived joke. Realistically, he knew this would not happen, so after a full minute of staring, he huffed out a breath and turned back to his mail. Something was bothering her, that was for sure. He couldn't remember the last time she had been that nasty to him. It might have even been years.

After throwing all the "junk" mail into the garbage, he gathered the important things and carried them into his office. He filed away bank statements and unfolded the bills one by one. He then logged onto his online bank account and began to sort through each item that needed to be paid. He tried to focus, but each time he would complete one bill and set it aside, he would find his gaze drifting through the open door of his office towards where Kate had stormed off and disappointment settled even deeper into his bones.

Nearly five months had passed since Kate moved into the loft and he truly believed they had been making great progress. Kate had come a long way from those first few weeks when she spent most of her time secluded in her room. She made full use of the apartment now, eating dinner most of the nights she wasn't on shift, and breakfast with them on the weekend mornings she was home. She'd also joined in during "Castle Family Movie Night" which was a monthly event he kind of (okay, completely) made up just to encourage her to hang out with them.

More than the family events, he and Kate spent time together just the two of them. More than a few times he'd been sitting on the couch in the evening either reading or watching television and Kate would sit herself down on the cushion beside him. If he was reading, he didn't really acknowledge her presence, but it did bring him great joy for though it was small and one could argue only minorly significant, to him it was just further proof they were on the right path. Now that baseball season had started, their evenings together had almost doubled. He liked those evenings better, too, because usually they chatted a bit during the game, especially if it was a particularly slow inning.

All their time spent together—not to mention the fact that they literally lived under the same roof—had brought them closer than ever before. They talked now—and not just meaningless chatter about the weather over eggs or cereal. They talked theory or strategy on her cases, even if he wasn't technically working them. They talked about her feelings if a case ended badly, or sometimes her triumph if it ended well. His personal favorite when something as simple as a commercial during the baseball game sparked a story from her past or even just a funny anecdote. To him, they acted more like best friends than they ever had and he loved that, which was why her outburst had been so shocking. Sure, everyone was entitled to bad days, but her comments had pierced him to the bone, not because he necessarily thought she believed them to be true all the time, but because she wouldn't had said them at all if she didn't believe them at least a little bit.

Castle had just put the last bill in the "complete" pile when he heard a knocking sound. Looking up, he spotted a guilty-looking Kate standing in the doorway of the office. When their eyes met, she offered a meek, "Hi."

"Hi." He echoed, trying to maintain a neutral tone, though he was admittedly curious as to what she was about to say.

She took three steps into his office and clasped her hands in front of her. He took note that she now had her hair in a ponytail, and she'd changed into jeans and a long-sleeve t-shirt bearing the Mets logo. "I came to apologize for snapping at you. I'm sorry. That was completely uncalled for. I have a headache, I had a victim's mother yell at me over the phone late this afternoon, and I just… I'm sorry. I had a bad day, but you didn't deserve to have me take it out on you."

He gave her a small smile and walked around his desk so that they could more easily face each other. "Thank you for apologizing. Would you like to talk about it? That issue with the victim's mother, I mean."

"No. See that's… that's kind of my point." She gave her head a little shake. "You don't have to do this. Any of this."

Despite the way she gestured towards him, Castle remained confuse as to what she referenced. "What do you mean 'this?'"

"Offering me drinks or dinner or…talking. We're just…roommates."

Castle tried his best not to let the hurt he felt in his chest display on his face. "I completely disagree with you. We're friends—partners."

"Sure, but…" She dropped her chin to her chest for a moment and then looked back up at him saying, "I do appreciate what you do, Castle—please never think otherwise—but you don't _have_ to do any of it and I just…I don't…. I guess I don't want you going out of your way to do anything for me, because that's really not necessary."

"But that's not how I think of it." He countered without hesitation. "Offering you dinner or to get you some wine isn't going out of my way—not at all. I honestly don't think twice about it. It's just…it's who I am."

In truth, he never really gave it an excessive amount of thought, but he'd had that nurturing instinct practically from the beginning—at least when it came to those he cared about. When it became evident to him that his mother's cooking skills would never rise above sub-par, he leaned to cook for them. When his infant daughter was placed into his arms, he felt his world shift in an instant and never thought twice about getting up several times during the night to feed or comfort her. Even then, sixteen years later, he still wanted to make sure she felt happy, loved, and safe in every way. When he saw close friends struggling, he immediately thought of ways to help. Taking care of people was second nature to him; it would have been strange not to do it.

"I like taking care of people," he continued, his tone soft. "It's…it's fun for me. The appreciative smiles on their faces, the lighter step they have when they walk away… It makes me happy. I never think twice about making a little bit of extra food for dinner or picking out a bottle of wine I know you'll like when I'm at the store. Not doing those things never even crosses my mind I just…I just do it." He concluded with a little shrug.

She stared at him for the better part of ten seconds without moving. He actually doubted she was breathing until she blinked, clearly baffled and said, "You're being serious, aren't you?"

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"I don't know. I just… I guess it just further reaffirms I've never met anyone like you."

A breathy half-laugh escaped his lips and he said, "I'm going to choose to take that as a compliment."

She smiled. "You should."

"Thanks. I, um, I was just thinking about turning on the TV and seeing if there's a game to watch. Would you like to join me?"

"Um, okay. For a little while."

Castle briefly returned to his computer to log out of the bank's website and then shut the lid on the laptop. He met Kate on the sofa and flipped through all his available sports channels until he found a watchable game. Then, he retrieved his iPad so he could see if there were any new, interesting games to download.

Half an hour later, the game on TV was wrapping up, and Castle finally looked to his left to see that Kate was curled up asleep at the opposite end of the sofa. He smiled to himself, then bent over and reached for the knit blanket stashed under the coffee table. He pulled it out and carefully draped it over her legs and feet before turning off the TV, standing, and stretching out his back. He then gazed down at her sleeping and smiled softly. Were they a real couple he would not have hesitated to scoop her up and carry her to bed. He doubted they would be in that place any time soon, but after the conversation they just had the hope was still there—and more alive than ever—and that was all he needed for the time being. It was enough.

* * *

"Hey girl! Sorry I'm late!"

Kate glanced up to see her friend and co-worker, Lanie, approaching and smiled while giving a dismissive hand wave. "No worries; I've only been here a few minutes myself." They shared a brief hug and then walked over to the nearest vacant high-top table. A waitress quickly came over and took their drink orders while leaving behind a menu for them to look through.

"I feel like its been forever since we hung out like this."

"I know. I've been really busy lately. Plus, I spent a lot of my recent free time doing a lot of charity research."

"And how's that going?"

Kate nodded. "Pretty good. Actually, I'm going to be sending out a few checks this weekend." Now that she'd had her inheritance money five months and it had grown decently, Kate felt more comfortable with sending out donations. As she wanted to spread her wealth as much as she possibly could, she decided to give $150,000 to five different charities. When she'd first started her research before she actually had the money, she'd come up with a short list of charities she liked, so she went through that list again and chose two. Then, she went back to her research, which ended up taking far more evenings than she wanted it to, but in the end she felt the investment of her time was well worth it because she felt very happy with the final three she chose for that round of donations.

"That's great. So what else is going on with you? How's married life?"

At her friend's cheeky grin, Kate merely shook her head and said flatly, "Ha-ha, very funny."

"That wasn't a joke!"

They paused their conversation when the waitress delivered their drinks: a flavored martini for Lanie and wine for Kate. As she reached for the glass, Kate caught sight of the ring on her left fourth finger and rubbed it with her thumb as she said, "As you may recall: we're not really married."

Lanie hummed as she sipped her martini. "Look me in the eye and tell me you haven't see him naked."

Kate laughed at this unexpected inquiry. "I haven't—I swear I haven't."

"But you've seen him in just his boxers?"

Kate shrugged. "He had a t-shirt on too." And, really, that had only been twice, on weekend mornings when he started the coffee brewer, mumbled a hello to her, and then immediately disappeared back inside his bedroom. In truth: she hadn't thought anything of it at the time. Which, in fairness, was most likely because she had seen him in his boxers before—a little more than a year earlier when she'd briefly stayed with the Castles' after her apartment blew up.

"So he's seen you in your undies too?"

Kate clicked her tongue. "What is with you and underwear right now?"

Lanie held up her hands defensively. "I'm just trying to determine the level of intimacy in your so-called 'fake' marriage," she said using air quotes around the second to last word.

"Our marriage is fake, and we have no intimacy. Seriously. The most salacious thing that's happened in the past five months was when I was carrying laundry, dropped something, and he ended up picking up a pair of my panties."

Lanie's eyes went wide and she looked like she was about to choke on her martini. "That counts! That so counts!"

"It does not."

"Yeah? With how much intimate activity you've had—or should I say haven't had—in the past few months, it should."

Kate chose to say nothing, and conveniently at that moment their waitress returned to take their orders. Kate ordered fish tacos while Lanie chose the shrimp special. As they continued to sip their drinks, Lanie continued with, "But seriously—is it going okay? Living with them I mean."

Kate nodded easily. "Yeah, that's all fine. They're all…well they're kind of great, actually. Alexis is sweet and fun to talk to. Martha is…always entertaining. Sure, some days I wish I didn't have to share a bathroom, but we're making it work and its really not that bad. It really does feel like I live there now and now that I'm some…awkward house guest overstaying their welcome or something."

With a pointed look, her friend said, "I noticed you didn't mention Rick."

"Rick is fine. Very hospitable."

"Girl, you must think I'm an idiot," Lanie said with notable sass in her voice.

Kate blinked at her. "I don't think you're an idiot."

"Really? Because you just tried to describe Richard Castle as 'hospitable' and thought you'd get away with it."

Kate sipped her wine evasively and said nothing.

Lanie clicked her tongue. "Girl, c'mon. Do you need me to spell it out for you? You married Castle. _Castle_. I know it's supposed to be this big secret, but you and I both know how you feel about him."

"He's my partner."

"And?"

"My friend."

"Kate!" Lanie practically growled at her.

Signing, Kate rounded her shoulders and confessed, "What do you want me to say? I thought I'd be uncomfortable living with the Castles, but I'm not, and yes that includes Rick himself. We eat dinner together a few times a week and watch Mets games. Next week we're even going to one—just the two of us. And I…most days I try not to think what all that could mean."

He tone soft that time, Lanie asked, "And why's that?"

Taking in a deep breath, Kate said, "Because…with each passing day I can't help but think it could be really easy to have our relationship be real. Romantic." She confessed the last word as thought it might cause the table in front of them to burst into flames. Her heart rate increased and her palms felt clammy and even though she knew with full certainty that Lanie would not run to Rick and tell him what she said, still she felt mildly nauseated at the thought.

"And would that really be so terrible?"

"No—I mean yes. Yes it would, because that's precisely not the point. Castle and I have an agreement—a business arrangement. Nothing romantic or sexual is supposed to be involved so if I…that would be like betraying the agreement."

Lanie blinked. "Betraying the agreement."

"Yes."

She picked up her martini glass, gave it a swirl, drank the last of it and then concluded, "You know, somehow I think he'd be okay with it. Kate!" she said as she slammed the glass back down on the table, practically levitating from her seat with frustration. "Come on! It's me—you can be honest with me!"

Kate groaned, wiped her hands across her face and admitted, "I can't even be honest with myself. I…I'm scared. I'm scared." She repeated the words twice once they were finally able to come out. Her heart still slammed against her ribcage and her brow still felt damp, but the nausea lessened slightly. She had said it; it was out there and confessing that weakness hadn't been as dramatic as she feared it would be.

She let the statement sit for a few seconds before continuing with a further confession, "He… there are some days when we're in the kitchen together or watching a game on the couch and it feels like we could be a real couple. Like I could just reach for his hand and… but then I think what if he doesn't want… or what if he does, but it doesn't work out?"

Lanie slid her hand across the small table and gave her friend's wrist a squeeze. "There are no guarantees like that but, you know, you're getting a far better test run than most."

Kate could not help but crack a smile. "I suppose that is a good point." True, in the majority of ways they were still living separate lives while living in the same physical space, but they shared meals, talked, and made some decisions together, however minor they were at times. The way they were living now was far from a full romantic relationship, but it was a glimpse and certainly, as Lanie pointed out, the closest thing to a relationship test run they could have without actual physical intimacy.

"Thanks. I just want you to be happy, you know?"

Kate smiled. "I know."

"And," Lanie continued as their food was delivered, "you should talk to Castle about this. Or, at least think about talking with him about this."

Kate felt her stomach immediately lunge for her throat and she swallowed hard to keep it at bay. The idea of talking to Castle about her feelings or a potential romantic relationship between them felt akin to jumping out of a plane without having any skydiving lessons beforehand. Despite this, she knew Lanie made a valid point. If she was too scared to talk to Castle about a relationship, she wasn't ready to be in one yet, but that didn't mean she couldn't try to get to a place where she was. "I'll think about it. I promise," she added when Lanie raised a skeptical eyebrow.

The ME smiled and said, "Good; can't wait to hear about it."

* * *

**A/N**: Thank you thank you thank you for all your kind sentiments and reviews after my AN in the last chapter. I truly cannot say thank you enough. I honestly and truly appreciate all the support you have given me. As i mentioned before, it's not just about the negativity, but a disinterest/lack of motivation/muse on my part to write that's driving the fact that I'm walking away, but it's nice to know there's a group of people eager for me to come back if I ever choose to do so in the future.


	15. Chapter 15

**Fifteen**

Castle sat at his desk with his elbow propped up and fingertips drumming against the bottom of his chin as he stared down at pictures of beautiful beaches on his computer screen. He had intended to spend the evening going through the latest round of Black Pawn's edits and suggestions for the newly completed third Nikki Heat novel—and he absolutely intended on getting back to that task—but, per usual, he'd been distracted. All he'd done was check his email inbox to refer back to the notes Gina sent over. It wasn't his fault that he also happened to receive an email from his travel agent advertising deals on summer vacations. Of course, the fact that opening that email sent him down a forty minute spiral of looking at dozens of houses to rent on a variety of Caribbean islands _was_ his fault, but it was already the end of April and he'd yet to think about a summer getaway!

In looking at the gorgeous beach houses and cozy suites at all-inclusive resorts Castle could not help but picture Kate's face when thinking about a potential travel destination. He wondered what she would say if he asked her to go away with him, just the two of them. He would make sure that she knew they would have separate bedrooms in hopes that might convince her. As hard as it would be for him to maintain a casual, non-romantic attitude, he would for he still knew they were probably only halfway through the marathon run towards their relationship, but that was okay; he knew the wait would make the end destination worth it a thousand times over.

In the prior few weeks Castle did have to admit to noticing a small change in the way Kate acted around him. She had been friendlier and chattier and almost flirtier, though he wasn't sure that was the right word. Playful seemed more accurate; the prior week she'd taken him out bowling! True, it was a joint outing with Kevin and Jenny and Esposito and his girlfriend, Dominique, but still to him it showed impressive progress. Unless she was working an overnight shift she made an effort to come and say goodnight to him, ask how his day went, and what he had going on the next. For the first time it was truly feeling like they were in a real relationship and he could not have been happier about it.

Had Castle not seen the email from his travel agent he might not have thought about inviting Kate on a vacation that year. They'd talked about going to the Hamptons house, of course, but he didn't exactly consider that a vacation. The more he thought about it, though, the more he decided he had a chance of convincing her to book a trip with him. Maybe they'd kiss, maybe they'd make love, or maybe they'd just enjoy each other's company as friends. He was okay with any of those options as long as he was able to spend time with her, one of his best friends, and the woman who technically was his wife.

Leaning back in his chair, Castle absentmindedly spun the ring on his left hand while thinking about whether or not he'd prefer a resort or a rented home—or if he should let Kate decide. A moment later, his phone began to ring and he snatched it up hoping it was Kate. When he saw it was Gina, he grumbled to himself and smashed the 'answer' key with his thumb. "I'm working on the edits—I promise," he answered, because in his mind having the intent to work on something still counted as working on it.

"Well that's nice to know, but it's not why I'm calling."

"Oh. What's up?"

"You're probably going to be getting an official letter in a few days, but I wanted you to hear it from me. Early April sales numbers indicate you've sold your fifty millionth book worldwide, and Black Pawn wants to throw you a party to celebrate."

"I…oh…" He stammered, caught more than a little off-guard by the news. "Fifty million? Really?"

"Well you have been publishing for nearly two decades, Rick."

"Well, sure, but I…I never thought it was that high." He supposed that somewhere along the line he'd been given figures of accumulating sales, though they were usually after a new book launched. And, quite frankly, he rarely paid attention, because numbers like that didn't mean much to him. He didn't write for accolades or for copious amounts of money. He wrote because it was his passion and he couldn't imagine doing anything else.

"Well, it is. Congratulations, Rick; that truly is a remarkable accomplishment."

"Thanks. Thank you, Gina. I…I really appreciate that. I don't think I would have sold nearly that many without you."

"That's nice of you to say; thank you. Anyway, I won't keep you, but this just came across my desk and I didn't want to wait and tell you. As I said, you'll get the formal notification in a few days and, from what I'm hearing, the party will be some time in mid-summer, based on your availably, of course."

"Ah…yeah… I'll, um, I'll look at my calendar and give it some thought. Thanks."

After saying goodnight to Gina, Castle placed his phone back on his desk and stared at it, still feeling mild shock. Fifty million books—fifty _million_! Thinking back, he did vaguely recall the first time a Derrick Storm book sold one million copies. He didn't remember the exact year, but it had been one of the earlier Storm books. Back then, that number had seemed astronomical, almost unbelievable. Now he'd sold fifty times that and he was equal parts proud of his own accomplishments and humbled by the number of citizens in the world who felt his books worthy of being purchased.

With that thought in his mind, Castle pushed himself out of his chair and hurried out into the living room, eager to share the good news with his family, but when he walked into the dark room, he remembered that he was alone. His mother had gone to see one of her friends in an off-Broadway production, Alexis was spending the evening at a classmate's working on a group project, and Kate was still at work. He found himself momentarily disappointed, but then he decided it was okay. He would wait to tell them until he had Black Pawn's official notification in hand. Then he would gather the four of them were together to share the news. That would be much more fun and he couldn't wait.

* * *

Arriving home that evening, Kate let out a heavy breath as she shrugged off her coat and hung it in the closet by the door. She tilted her head left and right, trying to release the tension in her neck, though it wasn't much use. The day had been one of those so rough she knew she'd have to sleep it off, but that was okay as it was already well after eight; she was closer than not to bedtime.

Looking around the loft she found that it was mostly dark save for the small nightlight that was always plugged into the kitchen counter by the sink. She thought for a moment about the Castle family schedules and recalled that Martha had mentioned something about an off-Broadway show in a way that implied she would get tickets for anyone who seemed remotely interested. As she had previously fallen into that trap and learned to always use work as an excuse lest she be forced to suffer through a far-too-long not to mention uncomfortably personal one-person-show. She then shrugged figuring that Castle and his daughter must have been elsewhere, which meant she had the kitchen to herself.

Kate had barely taken two steps towards her destination when she caught sight of a light to her right. Turning, she saw that Castle was in his office using only a small lamp behind his desk to illuminate the space instead of the two larger lamps he typically used. She turned and walked in the opposite direction with the intent to greet him but slowed her approach and decided to turn the tables on what was typical in their partnership and watch him for a change.

It may have been a little unusual, but if pressed Kate would have to admit that her favorite thing about living at the loft had to be experiencing the privilege of watching Castle craft his novels from a front row seat. True, their dinners together were always enjoyable, and no one made her laugh like he did, but as she had been a fan of his works long before they ever met face-to-face, and even longer before they began their partnership, the behind-the-scenes glances she took at Richard Castle, mystery novelist, were unquestionably her favorite.

Raising up on to her tip-toes in order to walk quieter, Kate crept as close to the bookshelf wall as she dared without risking being seen. If she crouched just a little bit, she had a perfect view of the writer at his desk, his chin propped against his fist, his eyes clearly focused on the screen in front of him. After about fifteen seconds of watching him, he lowered his arm, tapped a few words onto his keyboard, and then returned to the chin-on-fist position.

The prior evening at dinner he had mentioned that he was in the process of editing Nikki Heat's third adventure, and she had to admit to being intrigued as to how the editing process would differ from regular writing. Of course, she had a vague idea based on the fact that she knew the definition of the word but considering Castle's version of "writing" didn't always match up with the definition, she was curious. If Kate had been asked to define what a writer did, she certainly would have said the position involved mostly planning, writing, and perhaps some research. What she witnessed seemed to be a great deal of video game playing, spending hours reading posts on writer-friendly message boards, and a smattering of him running out of his office excitedly trying to get everyone to watch a video of a cat falling off a windowsill that he found on YouTube.

While Kate liked to tease him about his procrastination techniques, she was fully aware that he did spent a significant amount of time actually writing his novels. He would mess around for as long as it took for inspiration to strike and then, once he was in The Writing Zone (as he referred to it) that was when the real magic happened. She'd only caught sight of it once or twice, but she'd been captivated by the intensity of his focus, which was so rarely seen. He also tended to make a lot of different facial expressions and she wasn't sure he was even fully aware of them, but they were kind of cute and she enjoyed seeing them, rare as they were.

Kate knew better than anyone that her partner was a lot to handle. He could be childish, arrogant, over excitable, and downright insane at times. At others, he was one of the sweetest, kindest, gentlest people she'd ever met. One thing she had not seen before moving into the loft was the serious, dedicated, intelligent side of him that came out when he was fully entrenched in his work. True, she had seen glimpses of that side while they were working on a case together, and she would never say that he wasn't invested in solving cases or didn't enjoy them, but seeing him write showed her that this—_this_—was what he was truly meant to do and where he used his talent the best. He crafted stories that not only entertained but could provide a valuable escape and a temporary shelter for those that needed it and for that she would not only always respect him but appreciate him as well.

After watching for a few more moments Kate decided she'd done enough creepy staring (even if turnabout was fair play) and moved into the doorway, giving it a little knock to announce her presence. Castle looked up from his computer and an ear-to-ear grin immediately stretched across his face.

"Hey! You're home!" He greeted her as though they hadn't seen each other in days, but really it was only about fourteen hours earlier, when he'd pressed an insulated mug of coffee into her hand as she rushed out the door on her way to her shift.

As it was impossible not to with the way he looked at her, Kate smiled too and felt some of the tension lift away from her shoulders. The day had been grueling, but somehow none of that mattered when he smiled at her that way. "Hey…yeah, I just walked in."

He glanced at his watch and then back up at her. "Long day. Big case?"

"Ah, difficult case, but not big. I got the confession and was processing the paperwork, which is what took so long."

He nodded and stood up from his desk chair. "Oh, well I wasn't sure when you'd be home, so I made a plate for you and left it in the fridge. Want me to heat it up?"

She waved her hand dismissively. "No, no; I'll get it."

"I don't mind."

"But you're working."

He didn't hesitate to walk around his desk and towards the exit of his office. "Psst, please! Like I don't appreciate a good distraction. Seriously, I was just about to take a break."

"I'm sure." She commented skeptically.

He winked at her as he walked past her towards the kitchen. She merely shook her head and trailed after him.

"So what was today's case? Sorry I missed seeing you get the confession—I always enjoy that."

Despite his grin, Kate didn't smile that time, particularly as the memory of that afternoon's events weighed heavily on her heart. She slid into one of the chairs at the eat-at counter and folded her hands together while watching him pull a plate of food from the refrigerator and pop it into the microwave.

"This morning a man was found dead in the stairwell of his apartment building. From the way the body was positioned, it was obvious he'd either tripped down the stairs or had been pushed. Either way, the fall broke his neck. He was a resident of the building, living there with a roommate, so naturally we wanted to talk to the roommate, only he wasn't home, so the boys did some canvassing and I tried to look into the guy's life to see if there were any other clues as to what might have happened. We also looked into the roommate and found out that he didn't show up for work today."

Castle let out a sing-song, "Uh oh," as he pulled the plate out of the microwave, felt the bottom of it, and then put it back in for thirty more seconds.

"We were just about to start looking into the roommate to see what was up when he showed up at the Twelfth claiming someone in his building told him we were on the case. He started talking about how he heard Angelo—the victim—fighting with someone in the hall and he didn't know who. He was being very suspicious and obviously lying. Only took about five minutes to poke some holes in his story and then he broke down."

"He killed his roommate," Castle concluded. He put the plate of food in front of her and then slid her a fork and knife.

Kate picked up the utensils and began to cut up the asparagus on the plate. Then she did the same to the piece of fish. After taking a bite of each, she turned to Castle, who was now seated on the chair beside her, staring at her with utmost curiosity. "Yeah, he killed his roommate. He said it was an accident. They were arguing over something of his that got broken when Angelo had some friends over. Angelo denied that his friends broke it. The argument spilled out into the hall, then into the stairway where he'd shoved Angelo's shoulder not realizing that someone had left some trash on the stairs. Angelo tripped and that was it."

Castle frowned. "That's a real shame, but I bet a lawyer can get that kid a pretty good deal."

Kate sighed, slid off the chair, and walked over to the fridge to get a beer. Once she sat back down, she said, "Unfortunately that's not all. He signed the confession and they were about to take him for central booking for processing when he… I'm not entirely sure what happened, but I heard shouting and the next thing I knew he had an officer's gun and he was waiving it around threatening to shoot people."

"What? That doesn't make any sense. Why would he…oh." The writer's face fell. "Suicide by cop."

"Yeah."

"Did they shoot him?"

"No, no. While we were trying to talk him down, Espo tackled him from behind. He didn't put up much of a fight it just…it just made for a rough day," she concluded with a rather weary smile.

"I'm sorry. I can imagine how stressful that was for you, but I'm very glad it had a good ending." Castle reached out and stroked his hand up and down her left forearm before leaving it near her hand while his thumb gently brushed across the bones in her wrist.

Kate glanced briefly between his comforting smile and his hand and immediately felt her chest swell with an unrecognizable emotion. Her skin tingled and her brow began to feel a little clammy, so much so that she momentarily put down her fork and picked up her drink, trying to cool herself with the chilled liquid and take a moment to process what she was feeling.

Castle was kind and understanding and she appreciated the way he sat with her, listened to her, and tried to comfort her, but it was more than that. It was more than appreciation for his friendship and partnership. The tingling feeling that was somehow joyous and slightly nauseating was one she hadn't felt for a very long time. It reminded her of those carefree middle school days when the most stressful things she had to deal with were difficult tests in science class and whether or not Trevor Simpson was going to ask her to the Spring Fling dance. Back then, the feeling she got when Trevor smiled at her from across the aisle in history class was nothing more than puppy love, but this…

_Oh, god_.

As the thought gripped her she nearly choked on her beer, but managed to recover with only a mild throat clearing. She gave Castle a smile she hoped did not come across as too terrified and he nodded to her before walking off towards the pantry, giving her a precious moment to breathe and process the word bouncing around inside her brain.

_Love_.

Oh, god, was she in love with him? No, surely not. She wasn't in love with Castle. That was…absurd. Castle was just her partner…and her best friend…and the person that made her feel happier than anyone ever had or she thought anyone ever could. He made her feel safe. And like she mattered. And like anything in the world was possible, even though she rationally didn't think that it was, being around him still made it feel true and, oh, god…_maybe…_

"So, I had a thought."

"What?" she said possibly a bit too quickly and definitely in a tone half an octave higher than the one she normally spoke in, but she was anxious for the distraction. Turning her head, she saw him approaching from the pantry with his hand plunged down into a bag of chips. Meanwhile, in an attempt to ignore the way her heart was hammering, she turned back to her own food.

"How much vacation time to you have?"

"Va-vacation time?" she asked, now genuinely confused by how the subject of their conversation had changed so dramatically.

"Yeah, for this summer. Do you know how much time you have available?"

"I, um…I think two weeks. Then I'll get another sometime in the fall. Why?"

He twisted his lips to the side and said, "Well, I was thinking that maybe we should go on a trip this summer, but I know we definitely want to spend a few weeks in the Hamptons so I'm not sure you'd have enough time."

"You know you can go to the Hamptons without me, Castle," she pointed out softly.

"But where's the fun in that?!" He proclaimed. "Maybe we can still go somewhere…for a long weekend."

"I, um, would this trip be for all of us?"

He leaned against the counter opposite her and said, "Actually, I thought maybe just the two of us."

Kate felt her ears began to heat as the first image that popped inside her mind was Castle sunning himself on a beach wearing only swimming trunks. "Um…were you thinking of this as part of our fake marriage arrangement? Like…a delayed honeymoon?"

He shrugged. "We could call it that, I suppose, but no, actually I was just thinking that we'd go as two friends who enjoy each other's company. There's nothing wrong with that, right?"

The corners of her lips tugged upwards slightly. "No, I suppose not."

He grinned. "So you want to go then?"

"For a long weekend—maybe. Where did you have in mind?"

"Oh…well I wasn't sure yet. Do you have any places you'd like to see? A travel Bucket List, perhaps?"

She chuckled. "Um, no; not really."

"Really, Beckett?" He shook his head with disappointment and then licked some of the chip crumbs off his fingertips. "I can just have my travel agent give us some ideas and we'll go from there, okay?"

She nodded. "Okay—but nothing too crazy, okay?"

He gave her a cheeky grin and said, "Okay,"

"Castle, I'm serious."

"Fine, fine; nothing too crazy. I promise."

"Great. Oh, and thanks for dinner." She added, not wanting her appreciation to remain unsaid.

He merely nodded to her and said, "Always."


	16. Chapter 16

**Sixteen**

Pacing back in forth in front of the desk in his office, Castle strangled his phone so aggressively with his right hand that his knuckles had turned white. Fifteen minutes earlier he received a call Kate's father that became the watershed moment for the dilemma he'd faced for the prior two days. There was no turning back now; it was all on him and, god, he wasn't sure he could shoulder the burden. He wanted to more than anything, but so much was at stake.

The current spiral of his life had begun with the news that Hal Lockwood, the assassin with knowledge of the man who hired the hit against Kate's mother, had killed Gary McCallister in prison. They had first been made aware of Lockwood and McCallister six months earlier, just before Kate learned of her inheritance. That case had resulted in both Lockwood and McCallister landing in jail, but not before Lockwood kidnapped Esposito and Ryan. Thankfully he and Kate had been able to sneak around a distracted guard and rescue the detectives before too much damage occurred. Ever since, Kate had diligently been trying to get Lockwood to talk or to show his hand in any way. Until that point, she had been unsuccessful, but from the small smile that briefly crossed her face when she leaned what Lockwood had done, Castle knew she thought this was her chance, unfortunate as it was. He tried to talk to her about it, but she brushed him off, which had been deeply upsetting, not because being shut out offended him (it did a little bit) but because he knew that when it came to Kate's desperation to solve her mother's case, she could easily become unpredictable and rash.

The following day, during Lockwood's hearing, all hell had really broken loose. Using some henchmen dressed as phony cops, Lockwood had escaped the courthouse and disappeared. Every aspect of their case was dragged back to the surface in order to search for his whereabouts, but with McCallister's death, one thing became clear: the man responsible for Kate's mother's death, the one McCallister had called The Dragon, was cleaning up lose ends. First Raglan all those months ago. Now McCallister, and with him out of the way there was just one other who had more details on the case than the mastermind was comfortable with and Castle was married to her.

Kate was in danger—grave danger—but of course she was being stubborn about it. Every time the subject was broached, she insisted she was fine. She claimed to be handling things, but Castle knew that wasn't true. Kate believed she was in control, but this was an uncontrollable situation. Lockwood was an assassin, which meant that if he truly set his sights on Kate, there wasn't a damn thing any of them could do to stop him.

Castle's stress level had progressively increased over the next day until that afternoon when Montgomery pulled him aside and asked him if he truly understood what Kate had gotten herself into. His response had been, "Probably not—but neither does she." It was then that Montgomery told him a story about the day he met Kate back when she was a beat cop. He'd caught her sneaking through the archives only to realize she was looking into her own mother's case, something that would not have been permitted at the time, but Montgomery didn't bother to writer her up because it was obvious that wouldn't stop her. Castle wasn't entirely sure of the point of the elder man's story until he concluded it with, "I could never stop her, Castle, and the way I figure it, you're probably the only one that can."

Castle was still processing that statement and trying to figure out how he could talk his tenacious, head-strong partner into walking away when he received a call from Jim Beckett. Though the man was technically his father-in-law, they didn't speak much. Jim had joined them for dinner twice, and Castle planned on inviting him to the Hamptons that summer, but he also got the impression that Kate's father found their married-but-not situation a little awkward, and he couldn't blame him for that. Thus, he was surprised when Jim called him, but as it turned out he had a very important reason for doing so.

Evidently, after Lockwood escaped, Kate had called her father and told him to leave town, to which he naturally asked why. She was then forced to reveal the truth behind Lockwood and his connection to Johanna's death. As Kate kept her father updated on what was going on, Jim correctly deduced that it would not be a stretch for his daughter to suffer the same fate as his wife, which was a horrifying prospect. Castle could hear the desperation in Jim's voice as he said, "I already lost my wife; I can't lose my daughter, too. She cares about you, Rick, and I'm pretty sure you feel the same about her. She'll listen to you; I know it. Please do whatever you can to stop her."

Ten minutes after the call ended, Castle still felt the nausea in his gut. He wanted what Jim said to be true; he wanted to be able to convince Kate she was heading down a life-threatening path, but could he? Would she listen to him? Or would she put on her Stubborn-Kate-Beckett face and shut him out. His biggest fear was her refusing to listen and going off on her own to face god only knew what fate; that was the main reason he had not confronted her to that point, but with every moment the situation was escalating. After Jim's phone call Castle knew more than ever that he was most likely her only chance, so he had to try even if it was one of the most terrifying things he'd ever do.

He was just about to go and find her so they could talk when he suddenly sneezed twice. Grumbling, he sought out a tissue from the box behind his desk, but as he wiped the underside of his nose, he caught sight of the congratulatory letter Black Pawn had sent him for the sale of his fifty millionth book. The letter reminded him of how happy they had all been just a week earlier.

When Castle opened the mail that day, he'd almost been unable to contain himself. Alexis was sitting at the kitchen table working on homework just a few feet away. It would have been so easy for him to turn around and wave the letter above his head, but with great restraint he held himself back; he needed to tell the family when they were all. Thankfully it was only a few more hours until Kate and then his mother arrived home. When they were all sitting around the dinner table, he slowly slid the letter out of his pocket and read it as though it was the most casual thing in the world. Of course, within moments congratulatory cheers and squeals of joy filled the air. They expressed their pride and excitement. And no amount of world-wide sales could ever surpass the wonderful feeling he had when Kate hugged him and kissed his cheek. That moment had been one of the best of his life. It seemed improbable that things had degraded so quickly; yet, there they were on the precipice of disaster.

But no—he wouldn't think like that, he decided. He would be able to convince Kate to back down, to stop her investigation. He had to; it was the only way to save her life.

* * *

Kate stood at the foot of her bed with her left thumb nail in her mouth. She ran her teeth across it lightly while staring down at the information spread out across her bed. She'd been staring at those same pages for hours—days, really. The information hadn't changed, but somehow, she had to force herself find the missing link—the clue that would lead her to the third cop that worked with Raglan and McCallister. He was the key—the one who had Lockwood on his leash all this time. The Third Cop could get his dog under control again, which was one avenue she could take, but he could also open the door to the mastermind behind all this—The Dragon. That horrible, evil man was the one responsible for her mother's death. He was the shadowed face she'd been searching out nearly fifteen years of her life and now she was so close—_so close_—she just had to find that missing piece. It was somewhere here, she knew it, but where?

"Kate?"

She turned to see Castle had pushed open her bedroom door just wide enough for him to stick his head inside. She waved him forward and asked, "Hey—have you heard anything from the boys?"

He nodded. "Ryan texted a bit ago to say they landed in Miami and he'd let me know when they knew more."

"Great. I was just going over all this." She gestured towards the bed, which looked chaotic to the untrained eye, but the piles made sense to her. Maybe Ryan and Esposito would have a breakthrough in Florida, but maybe they wouldn't, so she needed to keep pressing on with what she had. "I really think that-"

"Hang on." He interrupted as he took two steps closer to her. "Can we—can we talk for a second?"

Taking note of the uncertain expression on his face, she turned and asked, "About what?"

He gestured towards the bed. "About this. All of it. Kate… you have to stop."

"What?" she responded, genuinely confused as to what he was talking about.

"You have to stop, Kate. Everyone associated with this case is dead. Your mother, Raglan, McCallister. They're coming after you next."

"I know that's why I-"

"No, you don't know. You don't know!" His voice was atypically aggressive as he repeated himself. He scrubbed his hands across his face and then looked at her, his expression revealing frustration and a little bit of disgust. "Or maybe you do or you're just being too stubborn to care. They're going to kill you, Kate."

She shook off his claim, which she found absurd. "I'm fine Cas-"

"Don't give me that bullshit! You're not fine and you know it!"

She was so startled by his shouts that she took an unconscious step back and stared at him wide-eyed. He took a challenging step forward, stared her down, and continued as serious as she ever heard him.

"They are going to kill you, Kate. There are no second chances then. No do-overs. They're going to kill you, and if you don't care about yourself, then at least think about the people that love you. Your father just called me. He's so worried about you, did you know that? Do you know what it would do to him if you were killed, too? That's what he told me—that he doesn't want to lose you like he lost your mother."

"I…he's my father," she defended weakly. "Of course he's going to worry that-"

Again, he cut her off before she could finish, "So what about me?"

Her eyes flared wide and her heart rate sped. She searched his face for a moment, confused, for certain he had not intended to imply that he… No, that wasn't possible—or so she thought; yet he confirmed it a second later.

"Yeah, that's right—I love you. This is definitely not the way I saw myself saying that to you for the first time, but it's true. I love you, Kate. I love everything about you. You're frustrating and challenging and incredible in every way." He paused for a moment and skimmed his hand across his mouth; all she could do was stare and try to breathe. "I used to bring you a cup of coffee just to see you smile, but now I see that every day, here in our kitchen and I… I'm your partner—hell, I'm your husband—and I'm asking you to stop."

Somehow, the word "husband" snapped Kate out of her trance of disbelief. She reacted to the word as thought it was cold water splashed in her face. "Our marriage isn't real," she snipped while turning back towards the bed.

Castle reached out and grabbed her arm, forcing her to turn and look at him. "Isn't it? You think the last six months have meant nothing? Yeah, you're right, we don't have sex, but we have intimacy. When we share meals or sit on the couch and read together. Look me in the eye and tell me that isn't real."

They stared at each other for the better part of twenty seconds. Twice Kate opened her mouth to rebut, but she couldn't make the words come out, because she knew they would have been a lie. The relationship she had with Castle was as real as any as she'd ever had, but this was not the moment for that type of a discussion. Lockwood was out there, and they had to bring him in.

Stepping towards the bed she continued with, "Look, we just have to focus on-"

"No! You have to stop!"

The word "stop" exiting his mouth resulted in Kate feeling a tether inside her snap. She hated nothing in the world more than anyone trying to control her life—trying to tell her she couldn't do something. She'd lived enough years on her own to know what she could and could not do, to know how far she could push herself and a case and she had not yet hit that spot—she knew it. Yet, there stood this man before her. She knew that he cared for her, but that didn't matter in that moment. All she could see was a red octagon around his head as though his face had morphed into a stop sign preventing her from living her life. Her gut now churning with anger, she snapped at him. "This is my life, Castle. You're not the puppet master here."

Appearing offended, he returned, "When did I claim to be? I'm asking you—no, at this point I'm begging. Please don't do this Kate. I don't want you to get hurt; it would break my heart. I know this is your mother's case, and I'm not saying we can't find away, but it's not _this_ way. Not _this_ path. It's going to get you killed and you have so much more to live for."

She heard the desperation in his tone but couldn't bend for it. The idea of terminating her investigation into her mother's case felt akin to telling her lungs to stop breathing—especially when she was this close. She had to find that third cop and that would be the key. That would open the door. Then he'd see that she was right, and this was a worthwhile fight—a fight she could and would win.

The longer he stared at her, it became obvious he would not change his mind, which meant she would need to continue the investigation alone, but that was fine; she'd been doing it alone up until that point; she was used to it.

"I don't have time for this." She muttered as she walked towards the bed and began to gather up the piles of papers.

"You don't have time to consider your own life?"

"No, that's not…this isn't—ugh!" She growled and continued to collect the papers. She felt those iron padlocks on her heart snapping back into place as she spat back at him, "You don't have the right to say that stuff to me right now."

A flabbergasted expression crossed the writer's face. "I don't have the right? Why the hell not? Who has more right than me, the person who's stood beside you day after day since—what are you doing?" he asked when she brushed past him, her arms loaded down with papers.

"I have to go." She walked over to her closet, snagged her gym bag from where it sat on the floor, and unceremoniously dumped the papers inside. She then zipped the bag aggressively, picked up the strap, and turned to leave the room only to find that he blocked her path. "Please move," she said quietly, but he did not.

"Kate, wait. Hang on. Let's talk about this."

Kate had no interest in talking to him. He'd made his opinion clear, and that was fine, because it was his opinion, but she didn't agree with it and now he was wasting the precious time she had to get ahead of Lockwood. Having no other way to get out of the room, Kate was forced to give him a little shove so she could escape into the hall. "I have to go Castle," she threw back over her shoulder as she headed towards the stairs.

"Hang on—where are you going? Kate!"

Kate practically ran down to the entryway and grabbed the first pair of shoes that were hers in the closet. She didn't even put them on, she just carried them with her out into the hall. As the door shut behind her she could hear him calling out her name. It caused the beginnings of tears to burn at her eyes, but she forced herself to blink them away.

She had a case to solve.

* * *

Walking back and forth across his apartment, Castle quite literally did not know what to do with himself. His heart raced, his brow sweat, and his stomach spun around in his gut like laundry in a dryer. He felt as though he was permanently experiencing the first three seconds of a roller coaster's free-fall over and over again with no signs of stopping. Simply put: he was a wreck.

Nearly two hours had passed since Kate left his apartment and he didn't know where she was, if she was okay, or if Lockwood had finally taken her out. He had decided against literally chasing her out of his apartment for fear it might shut the door on their relationship forever. Instead, he'd texted her asking her to please come back so they could talk. Ten minutes later he called her, but the call went straight to voicemail. He left a message, called back ten minutes later, and repeated the process. By the time forty minutes had passed and he had not heard from her, he regretted his decision not to chase her more than ever, but it was too late; the city was too vast for him to search every inch and even if he could check some obvious locations, he worried about the off chance of her coming back to the apartment while he was out, so he decided to stay put and continue to try and contact her.

As the first hour passed, Castle's stress and despair began to bubble over into anger. Why did it feel like he cared so much more about Kate's life than she did? What the hell was wrong with her? Yes, she could be stubborn, and that was fine, but this was just absurd! Surely she had to know that the choices she made were closely nearing life-ending ones. Why was she letting her convictions overrule her self-preservation? Didn't she want a future? To experience the next fifty-some years of life? To have children and a family? And didn't she want those things with him?

In the end, that had been the heart-shattering moment. He had put it all on the line—his heart and soul. On his way up the stairs, he hadn't been sure of how he might try to convince her, but when he saw the determination on her face he knew he had to go for broke, so he'd used the only weapon he had to wield: his heart. He'd told her all the things he'd wanted to for years but was too afraid for fear they'd scare her away. He opened himself to her fully, hoping it would be enough to convince her not to throw her life away, but it hadn't been enough.

God, why hadn't it been enough?

Fury rearing up inside him once more, Castle stalked into his office, grabbed the glass of whisky he'd been nursing, and emptied the contents into his mouth. As the liquid burned its way down his esophagus, he stared across the office at his shelf of Nikki Heat books. He felt his hand start to tremble with rage. God damn, why was he cursed to love such a stubborn, frustrating, reckless woman? Why couldn't she see how wrong she was? She was going to get herself killed. She was going to die, and how the hell could he not feel like it was partially his fault?

As the rage bubbled over, Castle let out a scream and threw the empty glass in his hand at the bookshelves, where it exploded and clattered to the floor in a dozen pieces.

Barely five seconds later his mother swished into the room proclaiming, "Richard?! My god…what happened?"

"Sorry, Mother," he muttered before huffing out a breath, shaking his head, and leaning heavily against the edge of his desk.

"What's going on? Does this have anything to do with that case you and Katherine have been working on?"

Castle nodded his head. For their own safety and sanity, Castle had told his mother and daughter as little about the case as he possibly could, though with each passing hour they did not find Lockwood, he was getting ready to send them off on a spur-of-the-moment vacation to the West Coast—just in case. Now he didn't know what to think.

"Kate is… we had an argument over the case and she stormed out. There's a man after her and I believe he's going to try and kill her. She's…I don't know. She has to know how dangerous this is but I think she's too stubborn to realize she can't outsmart this guy. Or, the odds of outsmarting him aren't high enough to risk it and I'm just so…" His voice drifted off as the emotions crushed him once more.

"Go on," his mother encouraged softly.

Castle huffed out a breath and sat down in the chair by his desk. His mother sat across from him and he gazed at her with a defeated expression. "You were right."

"About what?"

Feeling his heart stutter a bit beneath his ribs, Castle wrung his hands together as he continued. "You were right about the real reason I agreed to marry Kate when she asked. I always thought she was tentative to jump into romantic relationships without facts, without proof. She didn't want to risk it, but I thought this marriage would be an in-between. I thought I could show her what we could be really like and...and then she'd want to be with me, too. And…" He breathed out heavily and shook his head. "You were also right that I got hurt in the process. I'm in love with her...I was before, probably at least a little bit, but now after all these months..."

"You should tell her."

A mirthless laugh escaped his lips. "I did. I told her that I loved her, and she left anyway. If she didn't love me, I...I could find a way to handle that. I could," he repeated as though he needed to convince himself while his heart felt as though it was being torn in two. The mental image of Kate standing before him being polite and kind yet firm in saying she didn't feel the same way about him actually made him want to vomit. He loved her far more than he had loved any other in his life, of that he was certain, and that kind of heartbreak would be wrecking, though rationally he knew it would not be insurmountable.

"I...it would be hard, really hard. I'd probably have to stop working with her and writing Nikki, at least for a little while, but I could find a way through. If she didn't want me, I could get past it, but if she dies? If she's dead, then how—Kate!"

Castle gasped when he saw her appear in the doorway of his office. The movement had caught his eye, but he half-expected it to be just shadows from the lamplight not the partner who had aggressively stormed out of his apartment a few hours earlier. In fact, he was so stunned that all he could do was stare at her until she cautiously stepped into the room, looked at mother and son in turn and confessed, "Sorry to interrupt; I can come back."

"Oh, not at all darling." Martha stood and sashayed her way towards the exit as though nothing out of the ordinary at all was occurring. She gave Kate's arm a squeeze as she passed. "I was only saying goodnight—now I'm off to take a nice, long bubble bath before bed."

Kate gave her a gentle smile, "Goodnight, Martha."

Castle watched his mother disappear towards the stairway and then turned his gaze back to Kate. If he was not mistaken, her eyes appeared red and slightly puffy as though she might have been crying. _Good_, thought the vindictive part of his brain. She had all-but broken his heart storming off the way she did, so her being upset only seemed fair. He only let that feeling linger for a moment, though, before he pushed it down. He would not let his feelings sour whatever moment they were about to have, especially not if—

_Shit_. His feelings! He had been confession to his mother when Kate arrived home, which meant it was possible she had caught some if not most of that conversation. Not that he'd said anything he hadn't previously made clear to her, but still, he was curious. Standing slowly from his seat he asked, "How much of that did you hear?"

"Enough." She took two steps towards him and continued. "I decided to go to the Twelfth when I left here. I figured I could work in a conference room there without being interrupted. It was starting to rain a little bit when I stepped out of the building, so I decided to take a cab. About halfway there we stopped at a red light and a couple crossed in front of us. They were huddled under an umbrella together, smiling at each other. Just as they walked in front of us the man leaned over and kissed the woman on the forehead and I…I just started crying." Her tone made it clear that she was surprised even then by the heavy emotions that had overtaken her.

"I'm not even sure what happened. One moment I was thinking about Lockwood and then I saw that couple and all I could think about was your face. The thing is: no one has ever told me they love me before, not like you just did. I've had relationships, most meaningless, but this... I guess I was a little like you, in a way. You said that you wanted to marry me to show me what a relationship could be like, but I thought the opposite. I agreed to get married—for the money, yes—but as a test. I stubbornly told myself, 'See, this will prove it; this will prove you don't belong with him,' but I only thought that out of fear." She paused and gave him a sad little smile.

"In truth: I thought I'd be no good at a marriage, even if it was kinda fake. I thought I'd feel crushed and suffocated, or at the very least constantly annoyed. I thought I'd be in your way, or that I'd annoy you and we'd constantly snip at each other, but that's not what happened. We don't snip or argue. And I…I like living with you. I like eating dinner with you and when we read together. It's so much better than being alone." She shut her eyes and a tear slid down her face.

Castle felt his heart lurch in his chest. He started to lift his hand and reach out for her to brush the tear away, but then he stopped himself. He wanted to comfort her, but he didn't want to ruin the magic of the moment. A few minutes earlier he'd been equal parts furious with her and fearful that their chance at a life together was over forever. Now, she stood in front of him saying everything he dreamed of hearing for years, certainly since they'd gotten married, and that was a miracle far beyond what he'd hoped for.

She took a few seconds, brushed her fingers beneath her eyes to remove the tears, and then continued in a steady voice. "I want to solve my mother's murder, Castle. I have to; I'm driven to, but I've been working on that a long time with limited success. Maybe this is my shot. Or maybe this will end up another dead lead. Or maybe I'll be the one that ends up dead. But as I sat in that cab, I thought...you know what I've never experienced before in my entire life? I've never had a man tell me he loves me when I love him too. I never thought I'd get that. I never thought I'd have anything like it. And now I want it. I want you. So, I had the cab turn around."

"You…" Castle began, but no more words came out. His brain was short-circuiting with all the information it was trying to process. Kate loved him. Kate wanted him. Kate abandoned her mother's case for him. She _loved_ him. She was standing in the middle of his office with tears on her cheeks telling him everything he'd ever dreamed of hearing from her and—"Wait," he said, when his brain stopped on a key point. "You had the cab turn around, but you've been gone two hours…"

She gave a little shrug and a guilty expression crossed her face. "I've been sitting in the lobby trying to get up the nerve to have this conversation with you."

"Oh." He half-laughed at the confession.

Kate took two more steps so that she stood directly in front of him. She lifted her hands and placed them flat against his chest before saying, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry that I hurt you. I don't want to hurt you. I want to try and be better. To try and be someone who's good enough for you to love."

"Good en…" His lips couldn't finish the words because they felt so desperately untrue. Lifting his hands, he cradled her face and whispered, "You are—god, you are." Then, unable to wait another moment, he lowered his lips and pressed them against hers. He kissed her again and again, lightly testing the waters as her fingertips curled against his shirt, but when she slid her hands down his chest and under his arms to grip at his back, he decided he couldn't hold back any longer. He placed the pads of his fingers at the base of her neck, held her fast against him, and parted his lips around hers. A soft moan escaped her mouth as she took him in, and he instantly knew that moment was the best of his life.

"Kate…" He breathed out her name with no small amount of relief, for she was there, safe in his arms. He let himself fully believe that she was okay and would no longer face danger from Hal Lockwood and his body trembled as the stress faded away. She was going to be okay. She was going to be with him.

He slid back from their embrace just enough to gaze down at her and see the soft smile on her lips. God, she was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen, and he didn't want to wait another second to have her. Moving his hands down to her hips, he began to gently nudge them backwards towards the second office door that led to his bedroom. Within a few steps she must have realized where they were going, and a hesitant look crossed her face.

"What?" he asked softly. "Too fast?" He wanted to make love to her, but only if she wanted that as well; the last thing he wanted was for it to be something she regretted.

"No, I just…just one minute." She slid her arms away from him and walked behind his desk to grab a tissue to mop up her face.

Deciding it would be best to give her a minute alone, Castle walked into his bedroom, turned on the lamp beside his side of the bed, and cringed slightly at the mess he'd left behind. He took a few seconds to pick up the discarded laundry and neaten the pillows and duvet cover. He had it mostly straightened when she walked into the room. Without saying anything, slid her arms around his waist, and gave him a tight hug. He was all too happy to hug her back, but as he stroked his hand down her spine he asked, "Are you okay?"

She looked up and nodded. "Just relieved. And maybe a little nervous."

He smiled broadly at her confession as it made him fall in love with her all over again. "Well maybe I'm a little nervous, too."

She arched an eyebrow at him. "Are you really?"

"I'm nervous, and excited, and happy, and," he paused to grip her hips and spin her so that her back was to the bed. Lowering his lips to her ear he whispered, "anxious to see you naked."

"Castle!" she groaned as her fingertips poked into his ribs. He merely grinned and nudged her backwards so he could help lower her down onto the bed. Then he climbed up beside her and lowered his lips to hers once more.

For the better part of the next hour they kissed, caressed, and explored each other's bodies. Whenever Castle had allowed himself to fantasize about his first time with Kate, he typically imagined it as a rough, rushed, highly passionate event, but the reality was quite the opposite. Perhaps because it was immediately in the wake of a life-fearing event that love and passion wore out over the frantic release of three years' worth of pent-up sexual tension, but whatever the reason was it didn't matter, because the way it happened was perfect.

Castle was never more in awe of Kate than as they slowly undressed, and he saw her soft, shy expression mix with playful, eager ones. They tugged at each other's clothes and laughed when the zipper on his jeans became stuck. When there was nothing left between them he took his time exploring her breasts and belly with his lips, looking up every once in a while to see an expression of adoration on her face. And the moment they finally joined together was one he doubted he could have described in words even if his future career depended on it.

After, they lay tangled in each other's limbs, their heads sharing one pillow. Her hand was across his chest, her fingers drawing lazy circles on his sternum, and his was tangled in her hair with his fingers pressed against her scalp. They remained in that position, sated and dozing, for ten minutes before Kate began to slide away.

"No, don't." He grumbled, his eyes still shut as he clung on to her. "Don't move yet."

"Have to."

"No." He grumbled again. As she was sliding away, he clung onto her waist and rolled towards her. He clung on to her and pressed two kisses against her shoulder blade. "Another few minutes and we'll go for round two…"

She chuckled and began to peel his fingers away one by one. He continued to re-seat them until she half-laughed, half-scolded, "Seriously—I have to pee."

"Fine." He relented in a childishly grumpy tone, finally allowing her to slide away from his grasp. When the bed creaked as she got up, he opened his eyes and watched her walk naked to the adjoining bathroom. Castle smiled at the delightful vision of her backside and the remembrance of the petite tattoo he'd discovered at her right hipbone. Kate Beckett was always surprising him—and he loved every minute of it.

He watched the bathroom door for her return, but to his disappointment, she did not return to the bed when she reappeared, but instead walked around until she was out of his view. "What are you doing?" he asked, rolling on his back to see her, but she'd somehow disappeared. Confused, he sat up and found her crouched on the floor, so he repeated his question.

"Just…looking for my phone…" She grunted as she slid her hand beneath the bed obviously in search of the device.

"No, you're definitely not going to need that until morning."

She lifted her head just enough for him to see her eyes, but not the rest of her face. She quirked an eyebrow and said, "What if I'm going to put it on silent so it doesn't interrupt us."

"Oh." He chuckled. "Well then don't let me stop you."

"Ah hah!" She proclaimed when she retrieved the object. She stood with it in her hands and he watched as she unlocked it. He briefly dipped his gaze to take a peek at her gorgeous breasts, but when he looked back up at her face, it was clearly distorted with concern.

"What's wrong?"

She looked at him. "I have sixteen missed calls. Three are from Montgomery...the rest are from Espo."

"Sixteen…" He echoed as that was indeed a high and unusual number. "Hang on…" He tossed back the sheet and slid out of bed to find his phone. It wasn't in his pants pocket, so he walked into the office to find that he'd left it on his desk. As he walked back through the doorway, he told her, "I have five missed calls from Ryan. I wonder—what is it?" he asked when she spun around and he could tell that her face had gone ashen.

"Epso texted me." She turned the phone so that he could read the display, but before he could she told him what it said. "It's Montgomery; he's the third cop."

* * *

**A/N**: :)


	17. Chapter 17

**Seventeen**

With a heavy heart, Richard Castle pulled his darkest black suit out of his closet and hung it on the hook behind the closet door so that he could dress. That suit, when combined with a black shirt and tie, was his unofficial funeral attire. He supposed he was lucky that he had not had many occasions to wear such an outfit. True, part of that so-called luck was born of the fact that he didn't have very many family members at all, which he did not consider lucky at all. He was grateful that not many people close to him had died, though he knew that would change the older he became. He feared the deaths would always come as a shock, just like the most recent one had.

Four days earlier he and Kate should have been secluded in his bed, spending their first night as a real couple exploring each other's bodies and loving each other to the fullest. Instead, they found themselves racing across town only to arrive half an hour too late. Roy Montgomery was dead and so was Hal Lockwood. Though no witnesses were left alive, and no security cameras were in the area, the only conclusion that could be drawn based on the evidence was that they killed each other in a shootout.

As the night wore on, Castle stood by his partner's side as she experienced an array of emotion. When they'd left his apartment, she'd been silent with rage and frustration since they discovered that the man she'd been seeking had been right in front of her all along. Worse yet: he was someone she had trusted as both a mentor and a friend, which made his betrayal cut so much deeper. When they found out he had died, her rage dissipated into confusion and hurt—so much hurt. She'd buried her face into his shoulder and cried not just for her loss, but for the realization that so many of her questions would go unanswered the foremost of which being: Why? Why was he involved in her mother's murder and why had he tried so hard to throw her off the trail?

When they returned to Castle's apartment at two in the morning, they were both exhausted, but he also knew his partner's anger had returned. Castle's biggest fear in that moment was that she would shut him out and use that event to raise up her walls once more. He asked her to come to bed with him and she initially refuted the request but when he tried again with, "Please? I just want to be beside you," she agreed. He could tell she was tossing and turning for what remained of the night, though he didn't mind, and when he awoke just after seven, she was gone. A text message told him that she'd gone into work and she wasn't sure when she'd be home.

For the next two days they didn't see much of each other. As one of the more senior officers in the department, Kate felt the loss of their captain meant she needed to step up and be as present as she could, at least until an interim captain was assigned. Castle tried to give her space, not just because she was busy with important work-related duties, because she was grieving not just Montgomery, but the death of a very serious lead in her mother's case. He truly wasn't sure which was hitting her the hardest.

When Ryan and Esposito returned from Florida, the four of them had met together in Castle's office and agreed not to sully the name of their dead captain. They would keep Montgomery's involvement in Johanna Beckett's case to themselves in order for his family to have the closure—and the memory—they deserved. Kate was the one who made that decision (not that any of the others could have made it for her) and it would have been obvious to any of them how difficult it was to her, but Castle could see it in every millimeter of her face. After the boys left, Castle had asked if she was okay with it and she had responded, "No, but it's the way it has to be."

Further complicating Kate's processing of the event was the fact that the day prior she'd discovered a voicemail from Montgomery on her desk phone. She'd been aware that she had two unheard messages on that phone, but simply hadn't had time to get to them. Instead of listening to the message then, she forwarded it to her cell phone and listened to it with Castle that night. Hard as it was to hear, Castle considered it a personal victory that she'd chosen to share that moment with him.

In the message, Montgomery told Kate that he was sorry for everything he'd done that had hurt her, including the actions he had taken that ultimately lead to her mother's murder. He said that he could not tell her who was behind all of this, for he knew it would get her killed, but he promised that the steps he was taking that night would end what had started and would keep her safe. His final line was to apologize again and say goodbye.

They sat in silence for nearly five minutes after the message played. Finally, Kate stood up and moved to walk out of his office, but he stopped her by saying, "Kate, please. Talk to me. Tell me what you're thinking."

She turned to him with a sad smile on her face and said. "I can't. Not yet. But I will."

That had been the night before, and she'd shut herself in her room immediately after. That morning, she had again disappeared before he was awake, but texted him the message that she would be back at eleven to pick him up for the funeral, since they were both chosen as pallbearers.

As he readied himself that morning, Castle was unsure what to think of how that afternoon and the following days would progress. On one hand, he too was still processing Montgomery's sudden death. While he appreciated the fact that Montgomery had attempted to save Kate's life by sacrificing his own, the writer inside him craved the answers none of them would ever get. Plus, as he loved his partner and believed her fights to be his as well, he shared the frustration that Montgomery had been deceiving them for so long, particularly over the prior few days when they were searching for the alleged "third cop" who ended up being Montgomery after all.

Selfishly, Castle found himself torn between those thoughts and the ones focused on his budding relationship with Kate. They had one incredible hour together before everything had fallen apart and that simply wasn't enough. He loved her and she said she loved him; they needed to be together. He understood why she hadn't shared his bed again in the prior few days, but they hadn't kissed or hugged either. Kate had the right to grieve in whatever way she needed to, but that didn't help him from being afraid of her falling back into old patterns and shutting him out. The prior night when she'd brought Montgomery's voicemail message to him had been promising for sure, but he remained concerned. He wanted her, he wanted _them_ and hoped after everything that day they could broach the subject once more.

"Castle?"

He heard Kate call his name and responded with, "Almost ready!" He quickly finished tying his tie and then walked over to his dresser to choose a watch for the day. He was still fastening it when he turned around to see Kate standing in the bedroom door wearing her dress uniform and looking very official, yet strangely sexy. "Oh wow, look at you," he said.

"Right back attcha." She smiled softly, then walked over to him and gave his tie a small adjustment.

Castle lifted his hands, placed them at her shoulders and brushed his thumbs gently against the edges of her shirt collar. She was so close to him—closer than she'd been in days. He wanted nothing more than to kiss her, but wasn't sure that was the right moment—not with them literally about to leave for Montgomery's funeral. The last thing he wanted to do was make her feel uncomfortable, so with great restraint he merely lifted his right hand, dusted the pad of his thumb over her jaw and asked, "How are you doing?" he asked. She gave him a look that clearly indicated she thought his question absurd, so he relented with a head nod. "I know, I know, but how are you?"

She shook her head and walked away from him. When she turned back, her arms were tightly folded over her chest. "I'm…angry. And frustrated. And I just feel so betrayed. I still haven't decided yet if the voicemail made it better or worse. I just… I just keep asking: how could he do this to me? All these years…he knew I was looking for her killer and he just sat on that information and I…I don't know." She concluded before flopping down on the end of the bed and burying her face in her hands.

Castle sat beside her and placed his arm around her waist.

"And today…they want me to give the eulogy. His wife came to the Twelfth yesterday and asked me to represent the department because Roy spoke so highly of me, and I… I have to do it, and I have to preserve his memory, but..." She paused and placed her hand against her chest. "It just hurts so much."

"I know." He sighed and nuzzled his face against the top of her head. He kissed her temple and said, "Just remember you're not in this alone."

She looked at him and smiled. "I do know that. I'm just not sure if this speech is-"

She stopped talking when Castle's cell phone rang loudly. He cursed under his breath and scrambled from the bed to retrieve the phone he'd left on his nightstand. "Sorry, sorry—I thought it was on silent. I…it's so weird—this is the fifth call this morning I've had from this same number."

"You think they're trying to reach someone else and have your number by mistake?"

"Possibly. They never leave a message. I guess they'll eventually stop calling…"

Her brow wrinkled and she stood up off the bed and walked over to him. "But yet that doesn't pique the curiosity of mystery writer Richard Castle?"

He shrugged. True, had the circumstances been different he probably would have answered the call after the third one, but that was no ordinary day. "I have other more important things on my mind. Clearly. And eventually—what…" His voice drifted off when Kate snatched the phone from his hand and answered the call just before it was redirected to voicemail.

"Hello?... This is Mr. Castle's personal assistant, what is this regarding?" She stared at Castle directly when she spoke, and he frowned. They didn't have time to mess around with bizarre wrong number calls; they were going to end up being late to the funeral.

After fifteen seconds, Kate merely held the phone out to him as a clear indication he should takeover the call. "What?" he asked her softly.

"There's a man on the phone," she said, holding the phone out more insistently, "He says needs to talk with you about your wife."

* * *

If Kate Beckett had been forced to list the worst days of her life, she would have struggled to keep it a reasonable length. Sad as it was, she had a lot of terrible days starting with the day her mother was murdered, continuing with the day of her mother's funeral, and at least half a dozen or more days during the darkest times of her father's drinking. Now, she could add the day of Roy Montgomery's funeral to the list.

Given the circumstances of his death and the mystery that still surrounded it, the day would have been difficult regardless, but being forced to eulogize a man she'd once respected with the nauseating taste of betrayal in her mouth was one of the hardest things Kate had ever done. With her partner standing loyally a few feet away, she managed to get through it, and the subsequent burial service, but sadly that was not the end to their tumultuous day.

When Kate had answered Castle's phone just before they left for the funeral, she truly had not expected anything other than a scam call, or perhaps an individual desperately seeking someone they thought had Castle's phone number. Hearing a man on the other end of the phone solemnly telling her he needed to speak with Castle about his wife had set the hairs at the back of her neck standing on edge. Her gut told her that somehow that phone call was related to all the other events they'd faced over the prior few days, and her gut had been right.

The man on the phone, who identified himself only as Mr. Smith (a name Kate assumed was a fake), wanted to meet right away, but when Castle told him about the funeral, he agreed to meet after. Thus, Kate and Castle could only make a brief appearance at the wake held at Montgomery's home before they had to sneak out while receiving many curious stares on the way.

They traveled back to Manhattan in almost complete silence and met Mr. Smith in a mostly empty parking garage per his request. Smith's first act as he cowered in the shadows was to scold Castle for not coming alone, but before he could say a word in his defense Kate chimed in with, "Yeah well he doesn't have a personal assistant either."

Evidently realizing he had no choice, Smith went on to explain that he received a file from Montgomery the night before—a file that contained information very detrimental to the mastermind behind all these events; the man Kate referred to as The Dragon. As long as Mr. Smith was in possession of that file, Kate would remain safe—assuming she did not continue to investigate The Dragon or dig into any of his dealings. That was the deal Montgomery had struck and the one Mr. Smith would now inherit.

Of course learning this sent Kate down into another spiral. She demanded to see the file repeatedly, much to the aggravation of Smith. Before things became too heated, she felt Castle's hand curl around her bicep as he excused them for a moment and pulled her back towards their car. While she breathed fury in his direction, he stared at her calmly as he said, "Kate, this deal is going to keep you safe; keep you alive and, after everything that's happened, I'd really prefer that you stay that way." She'd grumbled and attempted to fight until he cupped her jaw, brushed his thumb over her cheek and implored her with a desperate gaze and the whisper of, "Please."

Immediately, Kate thought back to the night of their fight, the night Montgomery died. She remembered how she'd hurt Castle, and how deeply she regretted that act. Though in some ways it tore her up inside, she nodded her head, and agreed to Smith's terms. She hated giving up on that chance to solve her mother's murder, to put her killer behind bars for good, but for the first time in her life, she did not just have herself to think about. She had _him_.

After they shook hands with Smith, they returned to their apartment where Castle announced he would get whatever takeout she wanted for dinner, but she refused as she had little appetite. Instead, she went to her room, changed out of her dress uniform and into loungewear, and then sat in the center of her bed with her legs crossed beneath her and really thought about her life and how the trajectory of it had changed so dramatically in such a short period of time.

A week earlier, she had really only thought about herself. Yes, she was technically married, and considered Castle both her partner and friend, but when it came down to it: she made decisions on her own. True, she might ask for advice now and then, especially if she thought the topic was something someone like Castle or her father might have more insight on, but when it came to the decision it was hers and hers alone. It truly wasn't until she watched Castle fight for her life while she brushed it off that she actually considered that a real partnership—the romantic, marriage kind—meant considering others feelings as well as her own. Of course she was aware of such a concept intellectually, but it wasn't until she saw the heartbreak in his eyes that it really hit her.

Thinking back on those moments, Kate realized how stupid she had been. Lockwood had been gunning for her, quite literally. At any time he could have broken into the loft and killed her and either Castle or his family could have been collateral damage. They could have been caught in the crosshairs or maybe Lockwood would have just killed them for fun. Worse: what if The Dragon tasked him to kill Castle as a way of sending Kate a message. Hell, he could still do that with another henchmen if she didn't heed to Smith's agreement.

Thinking such thoughts had tears steaming down Kate's face as she cursed herself for being so stupid. It wasn't just about her anymore. It hadn't been since that day in January when she and Castle put rings on each other's fingers, but it had taken a terrible series of events like that one to make her realize that she could no longer be selfish—not if she wanted to have the kind of life she'd only dreamed about.

For many years, Kate thought it wouldn't be possible for her to open up fully or have a real relationship until she put her mother's case to rest. She thought she needed that piece of the puzzle to complete herself but sitting there that night she knew that was wrong. Perhaps she would in some ways feel incomplete or unfulfilled, but that didn't mean she had to stop living her life. She only needed to find something she valued more—something worth putting aside her insecurities and imperfections; something that made her want to live more than anything. Thankfully, she had found all those things in a wonderful man who, by some miracle, seemed to love her despite her faults, insecurities, and shortcomings, and god, she loved him.

Making love to Castle for the first time was something Kate knew with full certainty she would never forget. When it came to her past relationships, she'd always found herself diving in to the physical stuff while leaving her heart behind, locked in a box in her apartment where it would never be let out, not even for a moment. To that point, she had been fine with those types of relationships, but being with Castle had put all those moments to shame. She finally knew what she had been missing all those years, and it was incredible and she wasn't ready to let it go.

After several hours of thought and reflection, the growls in Kate's stomach won out and she descended the kitchen to make herself a mug of tea and half a sandwich. After she ate, she went and sat in her favorite spot in the apartment: the window seat bench that allowed her to look out upon the city. By that point, the sun had set, so the world below was lit by street lamps and headlights. She wasn't sure how long she'd been gazing down at the traffic when she heard, "Would you like me to draw you a bath?"

"Hmm?" She turned her head to see Castle standing a few feet away with his hands in the pockets of his jeans.

He took a step towards her. "I could draw you a bath—you've had such a stressful day, you look like you could use it."

She smiled softly and shook her head. "No, I'm fine."

"Are you sure? You could use my tub; it has massaging jets."

"Maybe another time."

"But you still seem so…" He sighed, walked over and sat against her knees. He placed one of his hands on top of them and said, "I hate seeing you this way."

Giving him an appreciative smile, Kate landed on of her hands atop his and brushed her fingers against his wrist. "I spent the past few hours thinking… a lot of thinking, but I finally decided that I'm okay with not looking into my mom's murder anymore. I want to; you have no idea how much I want to. The old me would have thrown Smith up against a car in that parking garage until he showed me that file and I ran with it until either I solved this thing or I ran myself into the ground, but…" She dropped her chin and gave a little guilty shake of her head. "That can't be me anymore; not after this week."

She let a few moments of silence go by before looking back up to see he gazed at her, curious. "After this week—after Lockwood and Montgomery—all I could think was: what if I took a run at them and I failed? This guy, whoever, he is, is well-protected. He'd have to be with all the things he's gotten away with after all these years. I could have failed, and then what would have happened? If they came after me, that's on me, but what if they came after my family. My father, you, Alexis, your mother."

She watched as Castle's expression first turned to one of surprise, but then it slowly relaxed as she steadily held his gaze.

"I just… If something happened to them because of me, I would never be able to live with myself, and that's why I have to stop, because I know my mother wouldn't want me to solve her murder while sacrificing someone else's life—particularly the lives of those I care about."

Castle smiled gently, squeezed her knee, and then turned over his hand so that he could lace his fingers through hers. "You know," he started softly, "we never got a chance to talk about what happened the other night. I completely understand that everything that happened after with Montgomery took precedence, that's fine. Now, Smith has given us all this new stuff to think about and…well, the point is: if you still want to wait a few days to talk about it, to decide, that's fine, too. Please just know that I'm here for you and I want to be with you—when you're ready."

Kate felt her heart swell at her partner's sentiments. God, this sweet man; this sweet, kind, incredible man. How had she ever been so lucky to find him? She had already made the decision nights earlier, and being with him had solidified it. Now she merely wanted to shout it from the rooftops, but perhaps that was a little much. She had needed time after Montgomery's death to process, but now that she had, she didn't wait to wait a second longer.

Leaning forward, she cupped her hands under his jaw, and drew him in for a sweet kiss. As she brushed the pad of her thumb against his chin she promised, "I'm ready. I really am. Especially after today I think there's some things we both still need to process, but I'd like us to do that together. The past week has only reaffirmed just how short life can be and that the realization I had the other night is truer than ever. I want to be with you. I want this to be a real relationship, and I'm going to try really hard…I just might be a little bad at it," she added with a little laugh.

He grinned broadly and said, "I think you'll surprise yourself." Then he leaned in and gave her a sound kiss. She curled her fingers into the collar of his shirt and held him close even has he hummed out, "Mm I love you."

Her heart swelling so much she thought her ribs might break open, she said, "I love you, too." Then, she stood, grabbed onto his hand, and tugged him along with her. "C'mon."

"Bubble bath?" he asked hopefully.

She turned with a sly smile and shook her head. "No, to bed. We've got some time to make up for." His response was a half-groan, half-growl that made her laugh—and practically run the rest of the way to his bed. They really did have a lot of time to make up for.

* * *

**A/N**: thank you for all your reviews - so glad you all enjoyed the last chapter :)


	18. Chapter 18

**Eighteen**

Standing in the kitchen of the loft, Kate finished arranging her plate of cheese and crackers just as she heard a knock at the door. She hurried over to it, glanced out the peephole and then quickly whipped the door open greeting her friend with a silly little wave and a, "Hey."

Lanie gazed at her incredulously as she stepped over the threshold. "Hey? After the insanity of the past week all I get is a 'hey?'"

Kate merely shrugged as she shut the door. "Had to start somewhere."

Lanie hummed and walked further into the loft, looking around as though she'd just entered a museum. She had been there before, but only once, and very briefly to pick Kate up when they went out to dinner. That evening she was invited all the way in as she and Kate were having a girls' night.

Since she lived with two other adults and one almost adult, Kate rarely had the apartment to herself, and that was fine since she still saw herself as a guest in the space. In consideration of recent events, however, Kate felt more comfortable staking a bit more claim to the apartment, which was why she had invited Lanie over. She knew that both Martha and Alexis would be out, and Castle had promised to make himself scarce so the ladies could feel free to talk about whatever subjects came up. From his tone, Kate knew he implied he would be part of the topic of conversation, but she didn't want to give him the satisfaction so she merely thanked him and ended the conversation.

"I put some cheese and crackers on the counter, and of course I'll get us some wine," Kate said as she led the way towards the kitchen. When she glanced back over her shoulder, Lanie looked incredulous.

After Kate asked her what was wrong, Lanie said, "Who cares about cheese, crackers, or wine—I want to start with: what's it like now that you and your lovely husband are finally sharing a marital bed."

Kate spluttered slightly at the boldness of Lanie's question, even if it was expected. "Wha…I…why would you think that?"

Lanie pressed her left fist to her hip and gave her a sassy look. "Girl, please—it's written all over you. Between the extra bounce in your step and the lightness in your voice it would have been obvious, but you definitely have a…" Lanie paused and drew a circle in the air in front of Kate's face before saying, "'extremely satisfied from orgasms' look to you."

"Lanie!" Kate half-gasped, half-laughed. Knowing that her cheeks would be turning pink at any moment, she quickly walked over to the counter by the refrigerator where she'd left the wine bottle and glasses and carried them closer to the island where the cheese plate waited.

Nonplussed, Lanie slid onto one of the stools and shrugged, "What? It's about time. You haven't had that look in…well maybe as long as I've known you."

Kate busied herself pouring the wine for a moment while she thought of a delicate way to confirm that yes, she and Castle were now intimate, and it was certainly as fabulous as Lanie implied. Was it the best she'd ever had? An argument could certainly be made, but that was not the conversation she was about to have with her friend. As she passed off the glass of red wine she confessed, "Okay, yes, Castle and I have-"

Lanie squealed and wiggled her body so dramatically she nearly slopped wine onto the counter. "I KNEW IT! Okay—tell me everything. How did it happen? Who kissed who first? And what does Castle look like naked?"

Kate rolled her eyes and picked up a cracker and square of cheese together. "Obviously I'm not answering that."

"But obviously I had to ask." She winked.

Kate laughed, appreciating the lighter moment before diving into the tale. It was difficult to explain to Lanie what happened while still keeping Montgomery's secret, but she'd practiced the version of the story she was going to tell her friend, so it went well. She told her about Lockwood, and their dead ends with the case coupled with her stubborn determination to keep gong at all costs. She explained the fight she had with Castle, how she'd stormed out, and then finally the emotional revelation she'd had in the cab driving down a rainy Manhattan street.

"… and that's when I finally figured out that he was more important. That the life we could have was a once in a lifetime opportunity that I just couldn't throw away."

A gentle smile crossed Lanie's face and she concluded, "You're in love with him," in a tone that indicated both jealousy and amazement.

Kate dropped her chin for a moment then looked up with a soft smile. "Yeah, I am. I realized it a few weeks ago, actually. I came home after a bit of a rough day and he was here and he just… It wasn't anything extravagant or over the top. It was just him being him, but something about that moment was different and I finally realized. Or I guess I should say I finally admitted it to myself because I think I felt it longer than I was willing to admit. But that moment…we were sitting right here actually, and it was so simple, but I think that's how it was always supposed to be for me. Something ordinary, not a grand gesture. Of course…immediately after I realized it I pushed it down because I was afraid."

"Why?"

With a guilty shrug she admitted, "Because I've never been in love like this before. I've never been in a relationship that was so…I don't even think serious is the right word."

"Likely permanent?" Lanie offered.

She nodded. "Yeah. It's scary. I've conditioned myself to only think about the negatives in relationship—like how he might hurt me or how I might hurt him. It's hard to relax and focus on the good, but I'm trying, because the good is…it's really, really good." She could feel the so-wide-it's-almost-painful creeping back on to her face—the same one she'd been wearing for a few days, ever since Montgomery's funeral, but she couldn't bring herself to be mad about it; being happy felt too good.

Lanie reached out, squeezed Kate's arm and said, "Ohh I'm so happy for you—you're married for real now!"

"No." Kate corrected quickly as she and Castle had a conversation on the topic two nights prior. "We're dating."

"Kate!"

"What? I told him I wanted to take it slow, and he agreed, so we're dating."

Lanie blinked. "Except for the part where the outside world knows that you're married."

Kate nodded. "Admittedly, its complicated."

"You're crazy."

Kate laughed. "Probably, yeah."

"So, now that I know about you and Castle, how about everything else? We haven't really talked since Montgomery's funeral…"

Kate nodded and again took a moment to choose her words carefully. "It's been difficult. Having him die in the line of duty is obviously hard to think about and process, but I also think about how I could have been there. He called me a couple times while Castle and I were in bed. He didn't leave a message, but I can't help but think maybe he… I don't know." She skimmed her hand over her mouth and shook her head.

"Maybe, terrible as it is to think, you were in the exact place you were meant to be."

"Yeah, I do think that…but it's still hard. And the new captain, Gates, starts on Monday so I know that will make it…difficult, just because we're still processing Montgomery's death and now we'll be staring over, learning the workings of a new captain."

"She's from IA, right?" Lanie asked.

Kate nodded. "Word on the street says she's a real hard ass."

"Please." Lanie waved her hand flippantly. "You know you're always the teacher's pet, especially when it comes to your case closure rate."

She smiled softly. "Maybe, but I'm not sure how open she'll be to letting my husband consult on my cases."

Lanie hummed and nodded. "You guys are still going to do that? I mean, being married and working together isn't…a lot?"

Kate smirked. "Is that your nice way of asking how I'm not sick of him yet?"

Lanie gave her a pointed look. "Castle can be a lot to handle…"

"I know, and you're right—I couldn't do it every day, but he still wants to consult now and then and…I dunno." She shrugged and swirled her wine glass. "I'd miss him if he didn't."

Laughing, Lanie said, "Girl you really are in love."

"Yeah, I am."

"Well then." Lanie lifted her glass and waited for Kate to do the same before tapping them together. "Cheers to that."

* * *

At the unfortunate hour of 5:45 a.m., Kate's alarm began its obnoxious beeping. Wrenched from a deep sleep, it took the detective several seconds to roll onto her side, reach out, and smack the appropriate button to silence the noise. Beside her, she heard grumbling and felt the bed shift as her companion rolled over onto his back, though he never fully woke.

Rolling her head towards the center of the bed, Kate took a moment to appreciate the sleeping form of her partner. Though he was barely visible in the dim light of the bedroom, she could still see the outline of his nose and jaw line if for no other reason than she'd memorized them long before they began sharing a bed, though their nights together had solidified the image. Despite the fact that she knew she needed to get up. Kate tucked her hands beneath her cheek and took a few extra moments to watch her partner sleep. Despite the early hour and the tiredness that still burned her eyes, an ear-to-ear grin began to slowly creep its way across her face.

Though it was the fifth night in a row that she had done so, Kate still found it hard to believe that she was really there, spending the night beside him—her partner. The man she loved.

In all her previous relationships Kate found herself struggling to be comfortable sleeping beside a new person in those early weeks and months of a relationship. Of course there were the obvious challenges like snoring or restless sleeping, but for Kate the issue usually boiled down to trust. It took her a while to fully trust a new partner (though the argument could be made that she never _fully_ trusted anyone until Castle came along) and that made sleeping difficult. With Castle, that had never been the case. Granted, she had never before been as emotionally invested in a relationship before the sex began, so that was probably a large contributing factor.

As silly as it was, Kate loved the fact that they were now regularly sharing a bed. She liked the way he snuggled with her before they fell asleep, and the way his hand would occasionally find hers beneath the covers in the middle of the night. She loved the mornings when she didn't have to get up promptly and they could lay tangled in each other. And it had barely been a week! She knew there would be many more wonderful experiences to come—and she couldn't wait.

After reluctantly getting out of bed, Kate tip-toed her way across the loft, which was silent save for the hum of the refrigerator. She ascended the stairs with the dopey grin still on her face. She thought back to the way Castle had made her toes curl the night before, and as such completely stopped paying attention to where she was walking, which should have been fine before six am but it appeared she was not the only early-riser that morning since she nearly ran smack into Alexis just outside their shared bathroom.

"Oh! Hi…" she said a bit dumbly, never feeling more like a deer in headlights.

Alexis's gaze flicked down across her body and she said a cool, "Good morning."

It wasn't until the young red-head smirked that Kate remembered she was wearing one of Castle's Derrick Storm t-shirts and very little else. Deciding that outright ignoring that fact was the best course of action, she instead said casually, "You're, um, up early."

"I'm meeting some friends for breakfast before we go to school."

Kate almost laughed with surprise, thinking the answer might have been that she needed to cram for a test; however, on second thought she realized that would have been very un-Alexis. "Wow, kids didn't get up this early in my days. Have fun."

She'd only taken two steps around the girl when she was stopped by the sound of her own name.

"Kate?"

She spun around slowly. "Yes?"

Alexis gazed at her steadily for a few seconds before requesting softly, "Please don't break my dad's heart."

Equal parts startled and confused, Kate could only respond with a dumb, "What?"

Alexis's gaze turned solemn. "I don't know if you guys are trying to keep it a secret for a little while longer or not but, well, it's pretty obvious what's going on. Not that it's really my business but... he loves you a lot and sometimes... I just don't like seeing him get hurt."

Kate felt her heart clench beneath her ribs. She hated that Alexis had lumped her in with all the others—the past girlfriends of Richard Castle, most of whom had shattered his heart in some way or another. Though her gut reaction was to be defensive, Kate realized that she had actually come by the accusation honestly. Up until a week or so prior, she had been hurting him, however unintentional, because of the way she'd hid from her true feelings in an attempt to protect her heart. Though she wanted to confidently say those days were behind her, she knew she could not make such guarantees, but at the same time she was honestly trying and she wanted Alexis to know that.

"I don't want that either and I feel the same about him, I promise."

Alexis stared her down for several seconds, almost daring her to blink or give some sort of tell that she was lying, but Kate never did, so the younger girl nodded her head. "Okay."

Before she could step away, Kate suggested, "Maybe...maybe you and I could hang out sometime. Not at six am," she added with a little smirk. "We haven't really done that, you and I, but we should."

A smile slowly blossomed on Alexis's face and she said, "I'd like that. Talk to you later, Kate."

"Have a good day," Kate told her. Then she hurried off to her bedroom so she could get ready and not be late for Captain Gates' first day.

* * *

After receiving a summoning email in her inbox, Kate stood from her desk, straightened her blazer, and strolled confidently towards the captain's office. Though it had only been a few hours, Kate believed she had a favorable opinion of the woman from IA known as "Iron Gates." The new captain was certainly to-the-point and appreciated hard work, but Kate had no problem with that. She was there to do her job and do it well.

During roll call that morning Gates had given a brief speech, during which she'd requested to be called "sir" rather than "ma'am" and informed the group that she would be meeting with them all one-on-one in the coming days. Kate had not expected to speak with the woman only hours later, but she wouldn't complain about getting their meet-and-greet out of the way.

She rapped her fingers sharply against the doorframe of the captain's office and said, "You wanted to see me, sir?"

Gates waved her forward. "Yes, Detective. Come in, please. I have to say it is a pleasure to be meeting you after all the good things I've heard about your team."

Kate stopped just in front of Gates' desk, clasped her hands together in front of her, and gave an appreciative nod. "Thank you, sir. We work hard and try not to let any obstacles stand in our way."

Gates picked up a pair of reading glasses from her desk and balanced them on her nose. She glanced down at a file on her desk, read it for a moment, and then looked back to Kate. "You were also the youngest female detective in NYPD history. Is that correct?"

"Yes."

"And with all the other commendations you've received, your resume is quite impressive." Gates took off her readers, put them back on the desk, and then folded her hands as she looked up at Kate in an almost challenging way.

Gazing at the elder woman steadily, Kate said simply, "I don't do this for the accolades, sir." Of course she was proud of all her accomplishments, but that was far from why she worked tirelessly to bring justice to every one of the victims she came across.

"Well that's good to hear. Is it correct that your team typically has a fourth member? A…civilian consultant?"

Kate felt the skin at the base of her neck prickle at the question. Both Ryan and Esposito had speculated that Gates would not be as approving of Castle's presence as Montgomery had been and it was one of the things that concerned her the most. True, things were now completely different between them and whatever happened with the NYPD Kate knew that Castle would remain a part of her life and that she would see him every day. Despite this, not being able to work with him at least occasionally would be severely disappointing for both of them.

"Yes, Richard Castle."

Gates looked out towards the bullpen then back at Kate. "I don't see him here today."

"No, sir. He typically only works one or two cases a month these days."

"I see. So, you feel that your team needs a civilian consultant."

As she had prepared a response for such a question, Kate responded calmly, "I wouldn't say needs. We solve plenty of cases without Mr. Castle, but he does bring a unique perspective to the table. Most of us have been trained to see mostly the facts and evidence; he sees beyond that."

"He ignores evidence?"

Not taking the bait that could have flustered her, she continued calmly, "No. He sees the story that puts it all together."

Gates stared at her for several seconds before offering a small smile. "Well. I look forward to meeting him and seeing just how he consults." She let a beat go by before adding, "Mr. Castle is also your husband, is that correct?"

"Yes sir, but our working relationship is always professional, I assure you."

"Well, as I said, I look forward to getting to know everyone a little bit better over the next few weeks—and seeing how you all work."

Kate nodded, glad their meeting was wrapping up. "Of course, sir. We're all glad to have you here."

"Thank you and thank you for you time, Detective."

Kate nodded again then swiftly escaped the room, only letting out a breath of relief when she was at her desk. All things considered, the meeting went well, but she made a mental note that she would need to remind her partner to be on his absolute best behavior the next time he stopped by the Twelfth. That way, they could remain in Gates's good graces.


	19. Chapter 19

**Nineteen**

Standing off to the side in the ballroom Black Pawn had rented for his fifty millionth book sale celebration, Castle surveyed the crowed, took a deep breath in, and let it out slowly as he appreciated the moment. He had an amazing life, truly. He'd known for many years just how incredible his life was, but somehow it just kept getting better.

He thought all the way back to his youth when money had been tight and his mother was doing all that she could to keep them afloat while keeping the career that she loved. Then, she was nominated for a Tony, which opened doors that enabled them to have a more stable existence, but that was around the time that Rick was struggling with himself—struggling to believe he was good enough and fearing he might never be. If someone had told him then he would be standing where he was at that moment, he most certainly would not have believed them.

Even after the success of his first few books when his career was really beginning to take off, he never thought about selling tens of millions of copies of his novels—not even in his wildest dreams. To be fair, he didn't think much about the details of sales numbers at all. He had enough income to take care of his family in the way he wanted and that was the most important thing. Everything else was just a minor detail.

Gazing around the room filled with several hundred attendees, Castle began to feel his throat tighten with emotion. That little boy inside him who had worried for so many years if he was good enough had nothing but evidence before him, yet some days it was still hard to believe. He had made it. He was more successful than he'd ever dreamed both personal and professionally and that was something he never wanted to take for granted.

"Another champagne, sir?"

Castle's thoughts were interrupted by a waiter standing just a foot away holding out a tray of fresh glasses and wearing a polite smile on his face. The writer glanced down at the empty flute he held loosely in his grasp. That was his third in the evening and while he certainly wanted to celebrate the night to the fullest, he also suspected Gina would want him to give some sort of speech he would prefer to be coherent during so he shook his head and said, "Not right now, thanks." The waiter nodded, collected his empty glass, and then walked away.

Still not yet ready to rejoin the festivities, Castle hung back around the outskirts of the room and did the thing he did best: people-watched. Black Pawn certainly did know how to throw a good event. The ballroom was gorgeously decorated, the food was all superb, and the alcohol seemingly endless. Truly, he had not expected anything like this when he made arrangements with his publisher to have the party the last weekend in July. He thought maybe they'd have a nice dinner at a restaurant or rent out a small gallery. Knowing that all these people had come there just to congratulate him was…something. Then again, he supposed Black Pawn was celebrating for themselves, too, as he was not the only one to profit from the sale of fifty million books.

Walking a few steps further, Castle was finally able to see the table at which his family was seated. His mother and daughter plus Kate and her father. Along with them sat Ryan and Jenny and Lanie and her date (Esposito had been invited but had a family commitment that conflicted, so he couldn't attend). Watching them all smiling, laughing, and talking together filled his heart with great joy; he appreciated every single one of them and how they'd helped him on his path, even if it was just a little bit.

Castle watched each of them for a moment, but his eyes lingered longest on Kate, whose gorgeous smile lit up the room far better than any chandelier ever could. Barely more than six weeks had passed since the onset of their romantic relationship. In the grand scheme of things that was such a short period of time, but to Castle it felt like forever—in the best of ways. Being with Kate felt right; it felt like home. He already could not imagine a day when he didn't wake up beside her, or, in the case of those days she had a very early shift, sit across from her at the dinner table. Crazy as it seemed, in that moment he also found himself grateful for Michel Bernard, for without him he and Kate would not be married, and their romantic relationship would have taken much longer to blossom.

"Rick?"

Castle turned to the side and saw his ex-wife approaching. He nodded politely to her. "Gina. Quite an incredible party, isn't it?"

She dusted her fingers over the lapel of his tuxedo jacket and nodded. "Well Black Pawn appreciates its bestselling authors and wants to make them feel important."

"Well…I guess it worked," he said with a slight laugh.

She hummed and turned her gaze towards the table with his family. Nodding to it she said, "As if everyone here isn't already jealous of you, one look at her makes them feel it even more."

Castle smiled softly as Kate's snug, lacy dress in siren red had certainly made his jaw drop when he saw it. She looked exquisite—far more incredible than he'd ever seen her look before, and that really was saying something. "Mother took her shopping."

"Then we should be glad she isn't in leopard print."

Castle laughed. "Kate actually said something to that effect when she got home."

Smiling back at him, Gina said, "Happiness looks good on you, Rick. And now I guess I owe you double congratulations."

He arched his eyebrow as he looked at her. "Double?"

A sly grin crossed her face as she nodded back towards Kate. "Your marriage is real now, isn't it? I saw the way she was looking at you earlier."

Castle cleared his throat and casually looked away from her saying, "Ah…no comment."

"Uh huh," she hummed in a knowing tone. Then, before she stepped away she said, "I'd like you to give a little speech in about ten minutes, okay?"

He nodded to her. "Thanks, Gina." She smiled, patted his arm, and then walked away to continue working the room.

Castle took the next ten minutes to use the bathroom and think though the words he'd been rehearsing in his head. When about ten minutes had passed, he walked up to the stage where Gina was waiting. She introduced him to the crowd, and they all applauded. Castle hugged Gina as he took the mic from her and then stood in the center of the stage to give his thanks to all that had turned up to celebrate him.

"I'd like to thank everyone for coming. It's been so nice seeing so many familiar faces here this evening and catching up with some of you. Some days it's hard to believe I've been in this business for nearly twenty years…but then I look at that number," he paused to gesture towards the banner hanging on the wall behind him, "and I guess it makes more sense.

"Fifty million… it is humbling to think of how many people have read my works. Truly, I am forever grateful. Thinking back to my early days when I was getting more rejection letters than I knew what to do with, it would have been impossible to believe that I could make it here, but I have and there are some very important people I'd like to thank. The team at Black Pawn, of course. They took a risk on me and I guess it paid off. All the publishers, editors, and agents I've worked with over the years—they've been a great bunch. I wouldn't have made it this far, however, without three very important women. My mother, Martha, who provided love and encouragement even from a young age. My daughter Alexis, who inspires me and makes me proud every single day. And my wife, Kate. I can say with one hundred percent certainty that I would not be standing here if it wasn't for her. She gave me a reason to write again, and for that alone I'll be forever grateful. That was back when we were just friends, but now that I can call her my partner always…well, that just about makes me the luckiest guy around. Thank you, everyone. Have a great night."

Castle placed the microphone back in its stand then hurried off the stage as applause surrounded him. He then made his way to the table where his family sat. His mother was first in line to hug him and kiss his cheek. "Oh Richard, darling, lovely speech!"

"Thank you, Mother."

Alexis pushed her way into his arms next, saying, "We're so proud of you, Dad!"

He kissed her head and patted her back with, "Thanks pumpkin."

Next, Castle turned to Kate, who though still gorgeous with her smoky makeup and curled hair, now also appeared rather flustered. "You, I mean, it's-"

"Mr. Castle?"

Kate was interrupted by a photographer barging his way into their group and asking, "Could we get some pictures of you with your family?"

A little caught off-guard, Castle stammered at first before agreeing. "Oh, um, sure, I guess. Where would you like us?" The photographer gestured towards the stage with the banner, so Castle put his arm around Kate and Alexis, smiled at them both, and then led the way towards the stage.

* * *

Kate stood in the loft kitchen sipping on a glass of water while she watched Castle say goodnight to his mother and daughter with more hugs and cheek kisses. It truly had been an amazing night for him, and she couldn't have been happier about it. She was happy both for him, because he deserved every possible accolade for his successes, and for herself for being able to attend the night and celebrate along with him. Despite that enjoyment, she still found herself rather shocked and still processing all that had occurred.

When Castle first told them about the sale of his fifty millionth book, she'd been shocked and ecstatic. That number seemed so improbably high, yet she was thrilled to hear he would be honored by Black Pawn. She had been a fan of his long before they ever met, so she would have been happy for them even if the copycat murder case never brought them together, but as he was her best friend, she was positively thrilled for him. By the time the actual party date had arrived, she had also fully committed to her love for him, which meant she knew her pride and adoration would be spilling over at the event. That was why she'd let Martha talk her into going shopping for a dress, and on that point she was confident none of them were disappointed.

As the night began, Kate was all too happy to hang on his arm, fawn over him where appropriate, or simply be there to support him. The night was his and he deserved every second of it. Halfway through, though, she found herself torn between supporting him and processing all the incredible things he had said about her during his speech.

Kate found herself quite stunned by what Castle said about her. He had seemingly credited her entirely for his fifty million book sales when she knew Nikki Heat's portion made up only a fraction of that number. Even if it had been the bulk of it, she still didn't feel she deserved most or any of the credit. He was the one who crafted tales so wonderful and intriguing that millions just had to read them; she was only the cop who'd answered the call on a case relating to his books.

As she was still trying to process those words, she'd been pulled into Castle family photos. She'd wanted to protest, thinking that the night should be about him and his real family, but then she remembered to the outside world they _were_ real family, so she smiled and put his arm around him, hoping she didn't look too stiff for the pictures. She did insist that he take some with just his mother and just his daughter to commemorate the evening, but he only agreed if there could be photos of just the two of them.

Immediately after the photographer stepped away, Kate's old fears resurfaced, and she began to feel guilt over the photos. What if she and Castle ultimately got divorced? That had been the original intention, after all. If they divorced, would he always see that night as trained, even though it should be one he remembered for the rest of his life?

Just as those thoughts swirled in her mind, Lanie approached to say goodnight since she and her date were leaving for the evening. Kate hugged her friend and before they separated Lanie whispered in her ear, "You two just look so perfect together—I can hardly stand it!"

As Lanie walked away, Kate turned back to Castle, who caught her eye and winked at her. Despite the turmoil in her chest, Kate smiled in his reflection as she always did and suddenly, the weight on her shoulders felt a little lighter. _What if_ they didn't divorce? _What if_ the photos they took that night were added to the Castle family piano photo gallery? _What if_ one day they showed that photo to their children? Kate knew she wasn't yet ready to think seriously about having children with Castle or even to talk seriously about declaring their marriage official, but the thought of those ideas was not nearly as scary as she thought it would be. In fact, those thoughts brought her hope.

"Hey."

Castle's voice pulled Kate from her continued reflection and she glanced up to see that he approached. He finished untying his bow tie then leaned an elbow casually against the counter as he gazed over at her. "You've been quiet most of the night. Are you feeling okay?"

She hummed. "Yes, I'm fine. I just…I've been thinking about your speech."

He scrunched his nose. "Was it that lame?"

"Oh gosh, not at all." She reached out for him and placed her hand over his. "Actually, I was thinking about…about what you said about me."

Castle picked up her hand, kissed her knuckles, and said seriously, "I meant every word."

Kate felt her cheeks flush and she shook her head as her brain still refused to accept the notion. "But you wrote all but three of your books before you even met me."

"And I would have stopped writing completely if it wasn't for you and how you inspired me."

Again, she shook her head. "You wouldn't have, though. Writing means too much to you." Would he have struggled for a while to come up with a new idea after killing off Derrick Storm? Probably, but knowing him as well as she did them meant she simply could not believe what he said. Writing was a part of him, and she did not believe it would be possible for him to put away his laptop forever.

"Maybe I would have, maybe I wouldn't have; I'm honestly not sure." Using her hand, he tugged her a little bit closer until he grabbed ahold of her waist. "What I do know is that meeting you inspired me in a way I never had been before and not just when it came to writing Nikki Heat, but…everything. You made me want to do something meaningful, to be a better man. You still do—every day."

As she stared up at the man gazing down at her with more love than she ever imagined possible, Kate found herself at an absolute loss for words. Her heart stuttered, her breath almost ceased, and had he not been anchoring her, she might have swayed on the spot. She had no idea how she had been so lucky to find a man who loved her with such depth and absolution. She still wasn't even sure that she deserved it, but she appreciated him more than words could say. With that in mind, she merely picked up one of his hands with hers and gave him a little tug.

"Where are we going?"

"I was going to show you how much I love and appreciate you. Do you have a problem with that?"

He grinned and willingly followed her towards the bedroom, "Not in the least."

* * *

The following morning when Kate awoke, she opened her eyes to see her partner's face smashed down into his pillow and facing her direction. His hair was mushed at awkward angles, his mouth hung open and he was drooling slightly, but despite that she found him adorable. His position was indicative of completely sound sleep after being utterly exhausted—and she had no problem taking full credit for that exhaustion.

As it had not yet been two full months, Kate considered their sexual relationship to still be in the newer stages. While they'd had some sweet, sensual moments together and some rough and highly passionate ones, she knew that at the very least she was holding back a little bit. Not because she didn't trust or love him—because she did, completely—but because sexual intimacy was something new between them and it wasn't something that could be rushed. As she'd always held herself back in romantic relationships, she wasn't sure she'd ever fully let go with anyone. With Castle she felt she was at around eighty percent, though getting every closer to one hundred and the prior night had been a glimpse of that.

To thank him for the incredible things he'd said about her during his speech at the party, Kate had gone far above and beyond, applying all the skills in her repertoire. At one point, Castle had been whimpering, simultaneously begging her to stop and to never stop. She'd lost track of the number of times he'd let out a string of curses while telling her she was incredible. He'd also fallen asleep almost immediately after, which Kate took as a compliment; her intent had been to wear him out and she had clearly succeeded.

As she lay there watching her lover sleep, Kate realized how foolish her thoughts from the prior night had been. Her heart felt so full when she looked at him. A relationship like theirs was something she never expected to find yet was more grateful for than she could ever express. She had tried very hard over the prior few weeks not to hold back, and to love him as fully as he loved her, and she felt she had mostly succeeded, but thoughts like the ones she had the prior night would be her downfall if they continued. If she obsessed and worried about whether or not their relationship would fail, it might become a self-fulfilling prophecy. She needed to do all that she could to banish those thoughts from her mind and simply be happy.

About ten minutes after she began watching him, Castle began to stir. He snuffled a bit then opened his eyes, blinking them a few times before they focused on her. Then, a dopey smile crossed his face.

Kate reached out, stroked her finger down the side of his cheek and sighed, "Good morning."

He turned his head just enough to kiss her inner-wrist. "It is a good morning isn't it?"

She chewed lightly on the inside of her bottom lip before asking, "So you had fun last night?"

His eyes lit up, presumably at the memories, before he confidently concluded, "The most fun. You're awesome."

She laughed and gave his ear a little tug. "You're not so bad yourself."

"Seriously," he said gruffly, sliding his hands across the sheets until they reached her torso. He grabbed ahold of her waist and pulled her body closer to his. "It's good we didn't know how amazing that would be or there's no way we could have waited six months. Hell, there's no way we could have waited over three years."

She hummed and reminded him, "But it wouldn't have been the same if we'd had slept together after that first case."

"Still would have been fun."

"Yeah."

He then yawned and pulled his left hand away from her so that he could rub his fist over both eyes. Sighing, he snuggled back against the pillow and said, "Mmm, okay; I'll get up in a few minutes and make us pancakes."

"I can make breakfast."

He smiled softly. "But I want to. Just…just a few more minutes."

When he shut his eyes, Kate did too, figuring they'd maybe get in a power-nap together. She felt his thumb brush against her ribs and didn't think much of it until his whole hand slid up her torso until it cradled her breast. Her eyes popped open and saw that he still appeared to be trying to sleep, but it was obvious he was faking. Considering she had no complaints about his activities, she didn't say anything—at least not until his hand drifted southward and found the juncture of her legs.

"Rick!" she half-laughed. One of his eyes opened. "What are you doing?"

"Well," he began casually, pushing himself up on his one elbow and then rolling over on top of her. "I thought about sleeping…but then I thought I could thank you for your 'thank you' last night."

"Is that soo—ohh! Castle!" She gasped when his fingers grazed over her most sensitive spot. He smirked at her then lowered his lips so that he could kiss her neck, then her collar bone, then the space between her breasts…

Kate shut her eyes and rolled her head back against her pillow as Castle used his mouth to bring her to whimpers and moans. God, she would never not be amazed at the fact that his mouth used to be her least favorite thing about him and now it was far and above her favorite. He was an incredibly talented man in many, many ways.

After he'd made her fall apart, he crawled out from under the sheets, winked at her and said, "I'll start the pancakes; take your time getting up."

She had no intention of responding verbally as she didn't think she could form words yet, but when she saw him walking towards the hall she managed to call out, "Pants!" as a reminder.

Castle stopped, gazed down at himself almost as though he'd completely forgotten he was naked, and grumbled. Turning back to the bed, he grabbed his discarded boxers from the night before and pointed to her, saying, "In two weeks when we go to the Hamptons we're having a naked breakfast." Then, with that, he grabbed his robe and left the room. All Kate could do was chuckle and smile; she really was too sated to do anything else.

* * *

**A/N**: remember 1 more chap + epilogue :)

thanks for reading!


	20. Chapter 20

**Twenty**

Kate Beckett huffed out a breath when she found her path on the sidewalk blocked by a trio of twenty-somethings walking side-by-side at an agonizingly slow pace. Given how they were gazing upwards and pointing, she figured they were tourists continually amazed by size of Manhattan's high-rises. That was all well and good and she hoped they had a good trip—but not at the expense of making her later than she already was! Finally, when they arrived at a street corner she was able to scoot around them and continue on her path uptown.

Now that it was August, Kate was coming to the full realization that she had hardly enjoyed her summer—which honestly was not too much different than any other year. After all her years on the force, Kate had drawn the conclusion that summer in New York was more like a constant full moon; everyone was crazy. True, the population was reduced by those spending the majority of their time out on Long Island, but there was a high influx of tourist. Plus, those that usually caused trouble did not have the funds to summer at the beach. Instead, high heat and humidity made everyone that remained a little crazy—herself included on some days.

When it started, she'd hoped that week would be a relaxing one, or at least a run-of-the-mill one since she was taking half of Friday off to go with Castle to the Hamptons. What she got was anything but. The week had begun with a triple murder that had her team on edge and their new captain breathing down her neck. Within the first day, the investigation had involved too many bizarre twists to count, so Kate invited Castle to help, much to the chagrin of Captain Gates.

Sadly, Gates' opinion of Castle had not improved much in the two months she'd been at the Twelfth. Every time he showed up no matter how chipper his attitude was, he was always greeted by her scowl. Kate found herself continually frustrated, for she loved working with her partner, but Gates' intensity through out certainly detracted from the joy she usually felt with him by her side.

Somewhat miraculously, that week Castle not only proved himself to be a worthy consultant, but actually made a connection that made Gates say, "Very impressive, Mr. Castle." They both had been overjoyed. While they were able to close their shocking case, Kate didn't even get to relish in that victory for more than a few hours before she was informed of a lawsuit that was brought up against the NYPD, specifically her team. The man suing them had been a suspect in one of their cases but had an air-tight alibi and was thusly let go. As it turned out, he also liked to dabble in frivolous lawsuits and was suing Kate and her team for allegedly mistreating him while he was in custody. Of course, they had not done so, and it was not the first time she'd been sued by someone looking for money, but the knowledge of this new case did not add to the pleasantness of her week.

Now, on that Friday afternoon she was running late because a meeting with regards to the lawsuit had run long. Rationally she knew that she was most likely not late enough to actually affect their dinner plans. They probably just wouldn't have as much time to settle in before they went to the restaurant, and that was fine. Still, she found herself frustrated because she knew how excited Castle was about their first official weekend getaway with just the two of them.

The first time Kate had been to Castle's Hamptons home had been in the middle of May. She was hesitant about going and intruding on his time with his mother and daughter, but, as per usual, he'd refused to take no for an answer. The house was, in a word, impressive. She was certain she had never been in a more beautiful home and enjoyed her weekend there very much. Since then, she had visited two other times, but only one of those was after the official start of their romantic relationship, and his family had been with them at the time. This weekend they would be alone and, as he continued to remind her, naked most of the time. She wasn't so sure about that part of the trip, but she was very anxiously awaiting spending time alone together particularly since in her mind it would be the precursor to their solo trip to St Lucia in just a few weeks.

As Kate approached the Third Avenue coffee shop where she'd agreed to meet her companion, she saw his Mercedes parked half a block away and smiled to herself. The weekend really was upon her—finally. She practically ran to the shop and burst through the door excited to see him. Her eyes scanned the room and she'd half expected to see him relaxing back in a chair with his phone in his hand that she was completely thrown off balance by what she actually found.

"Wha—I…what are you… Why do you have a baby?" she asked dumbly for seated just a few feet away in a table by the window was Castle. On his thigh he held a baby boy dressed in dark pants and a white Yankees shirt.

He glanced up to her and smiled as though nothing at all was out of the ordinary. "Hey Beckett. Ready to go?"

"Castle—why do you have a baby?" she repeated as that was clearly the most important question that needed answered.

Castle lifted the baby's arm and had him wave in her direction. "Isn't he cute?"

"Wha…where did he come from?"

"They're for sale down the street." He deadpanned. Then he smiled and continued with, "Kidding. It's this lady's baby."

Only when he nodded to his left did Kate realized there was a woman sitting at the table beside him. "Hello," she said politely. Still in shock, all Kate could do was stare at her in silence.

"Sorry Julie; this is my wife Kate."

Julie stood and reached out her hand to shake Kate's. "Oh it's, so nice to meet you; I'm a big fan of your husband's books."

"Oh. Okay." Kate nodded and shook the woman's hand as the pieces of the puzzle started to fit together. Slowly recovering from her shock, Kate looked down at the baby again and found that he was smiling up at Castle. "He is cute. What's his name?"

"Harrison."

Kate bent over at the waist, so she was more eye-level with the baby and said, "Hi Harrison," while waving at him. He glanced briefly in her direction, but then turned back to Castle and reached a pudgy hand up towards his face. Castle lowered his chin and caught the baby's fist between his lips, pretending to gnaw on it. The baby let out a laugh.

Turning back to Kate, Castle asked, "Are you ready to go or you want some coffee for the road?"

"Coffee," she said conclusively. As she walked up to the counter to order her caffeine fix for the road, Kate could not help but be utterly amazed that Castle had been handed a stranger's baby to hold. Of course, knowing him he'd probably asked to hold it. Still, the woman had agreed, and Kate found that also baffling. Her partner's adoration for small children and animals was one of the most endearing things about him, but somehow she could not help but wonder if there might be a point at which it ever went too far.

When she turned back around, she was surprised to see Castle now sat alone by the window. She couldn't believe she didn't hear the woman and child leaving, but her thoughts had drifted back to the lawsuit as she waited in line. "Where'd they go?" she asked when she returned to where he sat.

"Her husband called, and they had to leave."

Kate hummed. "So, do fans usually let you hold their children? I don't think I've seen that before."

"No, not usually. I was just sitting here reading and waiting for you when all of a sudden these cute little fingers curled around my newspaper. At first, I just tried to play peek-a-boo with him, but then Julie noticed and recognized me, and we got to chatting. He was reaching out to me, so I thought why not."

"Ah…"

He stared at her for several seconds before concluding, "You're not a baby person, are you?"

"Wha—no...I mean, they're fine. I mean they can be cute. I..." When he arched a skeptical eyebrow in her direction, Kate let out a huff. Obviously, her attempt to causally cover up her true feelings had failed so she finally confessed, "I guess no, I've never been a big baby person." Truth be told she never really saw the appeal. Had she seen the occasional cute child now and then? Of course. But she had never been the type of person that had to hold a baby when it was being passed around, or even go up to pinch his chubby cheeks. She did not dislike children by any means, but a baby person she was not.

"So, you don't want kids?" he asked, his voice tentative.

"I didn't say that." She responded instantly. Then, at the cautiousness of his expression, she felt her cheeks flush. This was not a question he was asking conversationally, but a serious question he was asking the woman he was sleeping with—the woman who was also technically his wife. He was asking her if she wanted to have kids, but really, he was asking if she was open to them having kids, so she took a few seconds to come up with the best wording for her answer.

"I honestly never gave the idea of having children a whole lot of thought. I'm definitely not opposed to the idea, but for so many years all I could focus on was my career. I wanted to graduate the academy, make my way through the ranks, become a detective and solve murders. Personal goals were never really part of that list. I promise you that I'm not opposed to the idea, I was just never really in a place to think much about it before."

He nodded to her. "That's fair."

She bit down on her bottom lip as she observed the hints of disappointment in his eyes. "You want more kids," she said as more of a conclusion than a question.

He nodded. "I always liked kids and even though she wasn't planned, having Alexis was such a joy that I knew I didn't want to stop at just one. Then…well, as the years have gone on, I was never certain if it would be in the cards for me again. I mean, hell, Alexis is almost a legal adult, so…" He let his voice drift off with a shrug.

Kate felt her heart clench in her chest. She wanted to sit down beside him, put her arms around him, and promise to give him the children he wanted, but she wasn't there—not yet. She wasn't ready to trust it yet—the feelings she had for him; the ones he had for her. Everything was still too new, but she also didn't want him to be sad or disappointed, because if there was anyone in the world she could see himself having a family with, it was him.

Reaching out, she brushed her hand down his arm and said, "Why don't we talk about this again some other time. Like after we've been together more than two months."

"But it's been eight!" He countered. Then he winked. "Kidding—I knew what you meant."

Rolling her eyes, she reached out for his hand and said, "C'mon—let's go to that big fancy beach house of yours, Mr. Castle."

He hopped out of his seat, all too eager to follow her.

* * *

When he felt himself being pulled from sleep, Castle groaned and fought it as much as he could, but it was too late; he was awake. He opened his eyes and stared up at the ceiling feeling disappointed. It was Sunday morning, which meant only half a day remained of the first vacation he took with Kate and he didn't want it to end. To that point, it had been wonderful, and though he knew they would have other weekends together, the first would always have a special place in his heart.

The moment they drove out of the city on Friday Castle could feel Kate's stress melting away. He held her hand as they drove, every once in a while leaning over and giving it a kiss. They were running a little behind due to traffic, so they didn't have much time to settle into the house before going to an early dinner reservation. Once they got home they drank more wine and got into the hot tub where they later made love, an event that he happily classified as one of the sexiest of his entire life.

On Saturday they started their day with coffee and muffins on the deck before going for a hand-in-hand stroll down the beach. They then went shopping to gather supplies for dinner and intended to use the pool, but a brief downpour kept them inside, which was perfectly fine with him, because they ended up making love while listening to the rain. Making dinner had been a fun adventure of stolen kisses and "accidentally" (but purposefully) bumping into each other again and again.

Now on their final day together, he wanted nothing more than to spend every second in her presence starting with the breakfast he'd promised to make her while he was naked (well, naked plus an apron—for safety reasons, of course).

Feeling his stomach gurgle at the thought of food, Castle turned his head towards the center of the bed but was surprised to find the opposite side empty. He looked in the opposite direction and saw his companion standing in front of the glass door leading out to the balcony off the master suite. The sun had already risen, meaning light was streaming into the room despite the blinds. Given the angle, he could only see Kate's silhouette against the door. He could tell she wore a short robe and had her hair up in a loose bun and though he could not see her face, he imagined she looked breathtaking—angelic. He took another moment to watch her, amazed by how much every moment with her made him happier than the last.

Castle knew with one hundred percent certainty that the third time was the charm and he'd finally entered into a marriage that would last forever. He and Kate would make each other happy every day of their lives. They would have many more mornings like that one with just the two of them. Then, hopefully someday they would wake up to their child scrambling into bed with them. It was going to be extraordinary, and he wanted their forever to start right then, but he also knew he couldn't rush her. Their time would come and he could be patient—even if it would drive him a little bit crazy.

When he finally pushed himself out of bed, Castle arched his back in a stretch, rubbed his right eye with his fist, and then shuffle-walked over to his lovely companion. He slid his hands around her until he captured her hipbones and could tug her body back until it met the wall of his chest. He then dropped a kiss onto her shoulder and nuzzled his head against hers while sighing out, "Morning, love."

She tiled her head back enough for her lips to brush across his cheek. "Good morning to you, too."

"Are you watching the sunrise?"

"No, I didn't get up in time for that. I was going to just watch the water, but then I noticed something in the neighbors' backyard. They have a crew setting up a big white tent. It must be really windy outside because they keep losing pieces in the sand."

"Nice." He commented. Then he craned his neck around her so that he could see what she was talking about. It did indeed seem that his neighbors would be hosting some sort of event in their yard that Sunday. The humongous tent now seemed fully erected and he could see stacks of white chairs being loaded inside.

"They must be going to have some sort of party."

"Or a wedding," Castle added without much thought.

"On a Sunday?"

Castle shrugged. "Weddings happen a lot out here. I…" His voice drifted off when he realized they'd inadvertently landed on the subject he'd just been thinking about: marriages. Specifically, his marriage to Kate. He promised himself that he would stay true to his word and not push her, but that didn't mean he couldn't have a little fun. "Actually, big beach houses like these are perfect for weddings."

"Is that so?" she asked, her tone a mixture of curiosity and nervousness.

He hummed and slid his arms around so that they banded together over her waist and he could hug her from behind. "Mmmhm. Just something to think about."

He felt her diaphragm stutter and her hands closed gently over his wrists. "Castle…" Her tone was warning, but it didn't need to be; he was done having his fun.

Castle leaned around and kissed her cheek saying, "I'm not going to say anything else I promise. I'm just letting you know how I feel." He then snuggled his head against hers again, intent on hugging her a few more moments before bringing up the subject of breakfast, but she surprised him by spinning around in his arms. She lifted up her right hand, brushed her thumb over his cheek, then leaned in for a kiss. She swept her tongue across the seam of his lips and then kissed him long and slow. When she pulled back, she smiled at him, a little sexy and a little bit shy, then simply walked off towards the bathroom without another word.

Even after the bathroom door shut Castle remained rooted to his spot. The mysterious Kate Beckett had rendered him speechless yet again—and he wasn't even mad about it in the least. Something about the way she kissed him and the loving gaze that followed told him that she felt the same—that she could see them having a wedding in a white tent outside on the beach. He knew in his heart that she felt the same as he did; that their marriage was real and would be the one that lasted.

And he couldn't have been happier.

* * *

**A/N**: The epilogue (which I promise is very long - the length of a full chapter) will be up Saturday :)

Oh also in the last chapter's notes i forgot to say my 'fun fact" - When i originally outlined this fic i had it set during early S4 and the "climax" (pun intended) was going to be the end of the book release party...but then i thought about it and decided that Season 3 was obviously a better setting for a Caskett fake marriage :P


	21. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

As she sat on the couch Kate absentmindedly brought her index finger to her lips, moistened it with the edge of her tongue, and then moved it slowly towards the book she held so she could more easily turn the next page. With the next page turned, she tucked her free hand back beneath the blanket draped over her lap. She was so engrossed with the story, that she paid no attention to where her partner was until she felt the couch sink with his weight. A moment later his hand landed on her thigh and he rubbed it tenderly but didn't say anything until she finished the page she was reading, lowered the book, and turned her head in his direction.

"Hi."

He dipped his head, kissed her shoulder, and then gave her a dopey smile. "Hi. How are you?"

Kate flicked her eyes up and down her partner, then studied his face for another few seconds. "Well now I'm wondering what you're up to."

"Me?" he responded with his voice half an octave higher than usual. "Why would you think that I'm up to something?"

"Because you have that 'I'm up to something' look on your face."

He grinned. "I'm not up to something—not yet, anyway. I was just thinking about our anniversary in a few weeks."

"What anniversary?"

He practically choked and his eyes bulged wide. "What anniversary? Beckett! Our _wedding_ anniversary!"

Kate groaned and tossed her book onto the couch beside her. Of course, he was bringing up _that._ Really, she should not have been surprised. It was barely more than two weeks away and he'd yet to mention anything or drop any anvil-sized hints, but in the end Kate did not feel the anniversary of the day they fake got married did not need to be celebrated with anything other than a brief mention the day of (and that was only because she was certain he would be offended if she didn't at least do that).

"Oh, Castle…that's sweet, but no."

"What do you mean no?"

"We're not celebrating the anniversary of our fake marriage."

"Beckett!"

She huffed out a breath at the tone he used; it was the half offended one he always got when she referenced the fact that their marriage wasn't real. She knew that every time she said that, a part of him felt like she was calling their relationship or feelings for one another into question, but that could not have been further from the truth. She loved him and valued their relationship more than anything else. And while they had discussed that no, they would not divorce at the one-year mark of their marriage as they had originally agreed upon, she also very much looked forward to marrying him again on her own terms. That was the point at which she would consider them husband and wife.

"I'm sorry, Castle, but on that day it was supposed to be fake. Why would you want to celebrate that?"

"Why wouldn't we celebrate that?" He countered. "Come on—the day you and I got officially hitched! That's one for the books! So…weekend getaway?"

She laughed and picked up her book once more. "No."

"Dinner reservation? Oh—dinner and a show? What do you want to see?"

She wrinkled her brow and shook her head. "No, it could be snowing. Let's just stay home. I'm sure we can celebrate here," she added in an enticing tone while running her hand up and down his forearm.

His expression fell slightly and he mumbled, "I just want it to be special."

Not wanting his feelings to be hurt, she rotated her body so that her knees and torso faced him. From that angle she easily placed her hands atop his shoulders and brushed her thumbs gently on the side of his neck. "Oh Castle, that's very sweet and I know you mean well but I'd rather save something extra special for celebrating our real anniversary—I know, I know." She quickly interjected when he opened his lips and she knew a protest was about to emerge. "This counts too but you know what I'm saying."

He grumbled for a moment, but then nodded. "Fair enough. I guess I… well, I mean obviously I want to celebrate all our anniversaries because I love you and love an excuse to celebrate, but I guess I was worried that our real anniversary is tainted."

"Tainted?"

He gazed over at her sadly. "Because it's the day Montgomery died, and we found out about everything he did."

Kate's hands dropped from his shoulders and she leaned back, surprised. So that was why he was pressing the issue of celebrating their wedding anniversary so much—because he was worried she wouldn't want to celebrate their real one. Her heart clenched in her chest, for that could not have been further from the truth. Yes, technically the onset of their relationship also happened to be on the same day as one of the worst events of her life, but she didn't connect the two in her mind. That was: she did not let one poison the other as he feared. She had never once thought that and knew she never would.

"Castle, I don't think of it that way—not at all. Yes, it is unfortunate those things happened on the same day, but I refuse to let it taint those moments we had together."

A soft smile crossed his face. "Technically it was an hour and seven minutes."

A laugh bubbled out of her chest and she could not help but reach out and brush her thumb over his cheek. "Right. The hour and seven minutes that were some of the best of my life. I never…I never thought I could experience a moment of pure happiness like that, but I did, and it was incredible, and nothing can ever take that from us, so I don't mind that being our real anniversary."

He turned his face so that he could kiss her palm. Then he brought his hand up to join with hers saying, "It was pretty amazing."

"Yeah."

"And we've had some pretty amazing times since then," he added with a naughty eyebrow wiggle.

"Yeah I can think of one or two," she said, feigning a casual tone. Then she leaned in and gave him a quick kiss. "We'll have dinner on our anniversary, okay? Nothing too extravagant."

He leaned back with a careful expression, "So I should cancel the three dozen roses being delivered to the Twelfth."

"Castle!"

"Kidding. It was only one dozen. Hey!" he whined when she poked his arm aggressively.

She shook her head and said, "You're terrible."

"Nah." He refused. Then he stood up, brushing his lips against her head as he did so. "I'll make us dinner—but it'll be an amazing one."

She gave her head a gentle shake and said, "I would expect nothing less."

* * *

Castle made sure to take his steps very carefully as he moved from the kitchen to the dining area, where his lovely partner awaited him. He held in his hands a carefully balanced—and surprisingly heavy—tray on which their desert was perched beneath a large silver roasting pan. This, of course, was not the presentation he was aspiring for, exactly, but it wasn't until after he'd made the dessert that he realized he did not want Kate to see it before he placed it on the table in front of her and the roasting pan was the only item he had large enough to cover the whole thing.

"Okay, my dear, are you ready for your extra special dessert?" he asked as he walked the last few steps towards the table.

"Sure," she responded with a slightly nervous laugh, but Castle didn't pick up on that, he was too excited to present his creation.

All in all, their anniversary dinner had gone quite well. Though it pained him to do so, he refrained from making their evening too elaborate. He'd made salmon and roast veggies as he knew that was one of her favorite meals. Thankfully she was able to work a regular shift that day so their meal did not have to be atypically early or late. She arrived home just as he was lighting candled on the table. She'd laughed, said he didn't have to, and then disappeared into the bedroom to change out of her dress pants. Castle watched her go with a secret smile on his face; he'd suspected as much, which was why he'd altered his original plans to ensure a surprise.

They dined together with great wine and conversation. He'd insisted on them running-down their favorite moments of their one year of cohabitation. He thought she would be more receptive of a retrospective if he kept it about their living arrangement rather than the marriage she didn't like discussing, and she was. He was pleased to hear just how many of her favorite moments involved the whole family. To him it only reaffirmed what he already knew in his heart; they were going to be together forever.

"Okay, here we go. Voila!" He slid the tray in front of her and felt his heart beat just a little bit faster as he wiped the roasting pan of and then moved his gaze immediately to her face to see her reaction.

Her eyes shifted back and forth over the cake for two seconds before she said, "Oh…oh! You made this?" she gazed up at him with slight surprise.

He let out a slight laugh and looked down at the cake, which was meant to be in the shape of two interlocking hearts and iced in light pink frosting. Then, in red frosting he'd piped out their initials and what ended up being a tragically misshapen Cupid's arrow. Unfortunately, 'misshapen' seemed to be the theme of the cake, because while the hearts looked mostly recognizable before the frosting, in the aftermath they became very blob-like. The only thing he was really proud of was how neat their initials looked. Thus, he was not at all surprised when he saw a flicker of disappointment in Kate's eyes initially; a cake decorator he was not.

"Yeah…I know it looks a bit wonky. I tried really hard, but I guess I should stick to coffee art."

"Oh no! No—it's really thoughtful and sweet." She reached out and grabbed his hand to give it a squeeze. "I love that you did this; thank you."

He smiled at her, then went to the kitchen to get a large knife and two small plates. When he returned to the table, he saw her gazing down at the pink mess with a bit of a sad expression, and he felt his heart clench. "Listen, I know it looks a bit disheveled, but I promise it tastes good," he said confidently for he had eaten the leftover cake pieces from his heart-creation surgery, and of course he'd licked the spatula after he was done with the frosting.

"What? Oh no its really great, Castle."

"Are you sure? You looked kind of…sad."

"No, no. I was thinking—imaging you trying to design this cake by hand. They make baking tins already shaped like this, don't they?"

He shook his head as he began to slice up the heart with "KB" in the center. "No—I checked several stores. I could only find a pan shaped like a single heart, not two interlocking."

She hummed and happily accepted the slice of cake from him saying, "Well who cares what it looks like when it tastes delicious, right?"

He winked and said, "I was hoping you'd say that." He then dug into his slice of the dessert—a white cake with a hint of lemon and a raspberry filling—and found it was even better when he ate all the parts together.

They were quiet for a few moments before Kate reached out, patted his forearm and said, "Thanks for doing this, Castle. I…I know I was being a bit of a stick-in-the-mud about celebrating, but this was really great. Really."

"Thank you. And I wouldn't say you were being a stick-in-the-mud; I get your reasoning. I just…well, I'm always going to take any opportunity to celebrate how much I love you. You should get used to it."

She let out a light laugh, and he could see the joy shining in her eyes. "Thanks for the warning."

"Speaking of…" Again, his heart fluttered, and he cleared his throat. He took a quick sip of water before continuing with, "I also want to warn you that I did get you a little something."

She let out a heavy sigh and set her fork down against her plate. "Oh Castle…you really didn't have to. I didn't get you anything and now I'm going to feel-"

"Don't feel bad." He interjected. "The thing I got you is small—really small, actually."

She arched an eyebrow at him. "How small?"

He merely shrugged. "You'll see…just finish your cake. It can wait."

She finished the two remaining bites of her cake, licked the excess icing off her fork, and then proclaimed, "That was delicious. And I still think you should put out a book of recipes someday."

He laughed. "Well, I'll pitch it to Gina next time we talk. I'm sure she'll love that idea," he said knowing the exact opposite was true, though she would probably get a good laugh out of it.

"So where is this small gift?"

"It's in the bedroom."

"Really?" Her voice rang with surprise, presumably because she had passed through their bedroom to change her clothes when she came home from work and she had not discovered anything. That was, of course, all part of Castle's plan, but he didn't want to spoil it, so he merely hung back and watched as she walked towards the bedroom. Then, after a few seconds, he followed.

He stepped into the doorway just as she turned on the lamp and gasped. Rising up on his toes enabled him to peer over her shoulder and see that his secret elf had done her job well; his plan was going perfectly.

"Oh Castle!" Kate gasped, her hands pressed against the center of her chest as she looked back and forth between him and the rose petal covered bed. She jerked her head back and forth for ten seconds before demanding, "How—how did you—but—you never left my sight!"

He casually shrugged his shoulders and confessed, "Alexis helped."

Kate's gaze flitted back to the bed with a bit of uncertainty, then she turned back to him and asked, "Alexis agreed to do this to our bed?" in a tone that indicated both surprise and a little bit of concern.

As she had yet to see the actual surprise, he could not blame her for this reaction, for her very much doubted his daughter would have been up for doing something to aid his sex life. When she heard the real reason he needed her to sneak into their room via the extraneous door in his walk-in closet, she was all too happy to help, but of course he could not give that away—not yet. So instead he merely smiled and focused on the fact that she had referred to the bed as "theirs," which it was, but only for the prior two months—after he'd _finally_ convinced her to move the rest of her belongings out of the guest room.

"Why…why don't you take a closer look?" he suggested, trying his best to keep his voice even when his heart was hammering against the inside of his ribcage.

She took two steps towards the bed and he held his breath for twenty seconds before she turned around with a soft smile and shrugged. "It's cute. Looks like her heart-creating skills are on par with her father's. Not that I could do much better," she added with a light laugh.

"Wha…" Castle croaked when Kate's reaction did not match near what he thought it would be. What was going on?

Confused and now a little bit anxious, he walked around Kate to the foot of the bed to see that yes, Alexis had tried to create two concentric hearts in the middle with more petals surrounding, but this wasn't right! They had agreed she would put the ring box in the center of the middle heart, but it was extremely obvious that there was no ring box there. How had she forgotten the ring box?!

Refusing to accept that not only was his proposal going totally awry, but that his perfectionist daughter had failed to complete her most important task, Castle shot his hands towards the center of the bed and began to dig around. It only took him a few seconds for his fingers to come in contact with a solid object and he pulled it out with a gasp of "Ah!" Evidently, Alexis had gone against their plans and put only the ring—not the box—in the center of the bed and it had inadvertently been buried among some petals.

Turning around, he saw Kate watching him with a glassy-eyed expression of awe and his stomach lurched in his gut. Shit! This was not how his proposal was supposed to go!

"I, um, I…" He glanced between Kate and the ring he pinched between his right thumb and index finger then dropped his chin with a bit of a huff. "I'm sorry—I guess that kind of backfired. I thought we agreed that Alexis was going to put the ring box in the center of the bed and—hey…what is it?" His tone turned soft when a tear slid down her cheek and she turned her head away from him to hide it. He stepped up to her and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. "Is it too soon? Are you upset about the timing because-"

"No, no." She turned back, shaking her head as a few more tears fell. She rubbed her fingers underneath her eyes to collect them and then confessed with a squeak, "I thought it was going to be in the dessert!"

"What?"

"The dessert!" She stepped away from him and walked over to the bedside table to snag a tissue. "You were making such a big deal about how special it was—I thought you'd put the ring in it."

Castle nodded slowly as the events of the prior ten minutes processed in his mind. He had been right—Kate did look a little bit sad as she looked down at their cake, but not because she thought it was hideous, but because it was only a cake! "You were disappointed?"

She shrugged a little bit, then, after a beat, nodded. "I didn't expect to be. When you went to get the cake I sat there, panicking a little bit, trying to figure out what you might say so I could be prepared. I thought maybe I'd ask for more time or…or…I don't know." She combed her hands back through her hair and then looked at him and made her next confession as thought it had been one she'd hid her entire life. "And then you took the lid off that cake and it wasn't there, and it was the worst feeling in the world."

His heart fluttering with hope and love, he stepped up to her and said, "Do you still think it's too soon?"

She reached out for his hand, as though she needed the anchor to say what came next. "We've only been dating six months. I never would have even considered after that short of a period of time. Not before, but then…I also never would have expected this. You."

From the love pouring out of her gaze, Castle knew it was safe for him to continue with what he'd wanted to say before the SNAFU with the ring. He brought her hand to his lips, kissed her knuckles, and then sunk down onto the floor on one knee. "For one full year, all I could think about was how much I wanted you to be my wife for real. For more than a year, actually. But on that day, as we looked into each other's eyes, I wanted it so much, but even then, I didn't know how much I could love you. How much I would love our life together. How much I cannot begin to fathom what it would be like to not be with you every single day. Now I know how wonderful it is to be beside you, and I know I want that for the rest of my life. Us, together, just like this. So…Kate Beckett." He paused to hold up the ring in front of her. "Will you continue to be my wife?"

"Yes." She breathed out her answer like a prayer and he shot to his feet immediately, smothering her with a kiss. Her arms banded around his waist and she held him so tight he never wanted her to let go.

When he pulled back, they shared a laugh, and he slid the ring onto her fourth finger where it clicked against her wedding band. He then dipped his head and kissed her knuckle beside the rings. Then he locked his arms around her waist, pulled her against him and sighed, "I love you so much Kate."

"I love you." She kissed him and then brushed her thumb against his cheek adding, "Let's get married this summer in the Hamptons."

Stunned, he half laughed. "Really? I mean—sure. Yes. Absolutely. I just didn't expect you to want to plan the wedding immediately."

She gave him a happy smile and said, "I never expected to want to marry you this much."

With a grin he said, "Well, you won't hear any complaints from me." Then, he pulled her body closer to his and smiled to himself, knowing he could not wait to start their life together.

* * *

**A/N**

I want to thank everyone who read and gave reviews. This story became my most reviewed story ever on this website and that its pretty incredible. I started writing fanfic about fifteen years ago so to have the one i intend to be my last be my most reviewed is something special. From the bottom of my heart, thank you to all of you who have read and reviewed; that means a lot to me. Maybe i'll write something again some day, maybe for another fandom, maybe note, but I will always appreciate everyone who has supported me over the past several years. thank you.


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